Dear Readers,
Revising has never been fun for me, but it is something every writer has to experience at some point. I usually feel that my work, while not perfect in its “final” product, is highly adequate in expressing my thoughts. This time, however, I accepted that revision was necessary – not because it’s a mandatory aspect of the assignment, but also because I knew very well how inadequately delivered my tale came out to be. I wanted to make my writing feel more…solid, so to say. For that I decided to use some of the advice bestowed upon me by my peers and professor first, and then add in personal changes after.
One piece of advice that I found was necessary to follow was to include more information about my “friend,” the guy who essentially allowed this entire story to take place. I tried to add enough details about him to make him seem significant without digressing from the actual events. In naming Adhemar and defining my relationship with him I hoped to give you, my readers, a deeper impression. I also tried to avoid using the phrase “It was” at the beginning of several sentences, in the same space where I identified Adhemar as my friend. My original intent was to create a sense of repetition, but that phrase does seem a bit clunky and non-creative. Instead, I rewrote those sentences with new beginnings while attempting to retain the repetitiveness of the subject, my friend.
To be honest, I feel that my revision could have been stronger with a bit more time and focus, especially the ending. I still have trouble ending any piece of writing satisfactorily. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being the highest, I would give my revision a 7. As much as I am dissatisfied with the ending, I still feel that my story has been given more depth and less formality, a goal try to achieve in anything that I write.
