I think one of the greatest problems we face when it comes to completing written assignments is the revision process. I often find myself typing up my agenda on a spreadsheet so I could assign certain tasks on specific days. However with my literacy narrative, I would say I initially underestimated the time it’d take to revise and finalize my writings. Firstly, I would prepare myself for revision:
Okay! Headphones in. Laptop is fully charged. Do I have my cup of tea? Yes. Now play the lofi playlist. Alright, let’s see what I’ve written so far.
A few moments passed by and I started to feel an overwhelming sense of uncertainty.
After reading my unfinished essay, I felt disappointed in my writing. Although we’ve all had terrible first drafts, I was swamped knowing that I had so many thoughts that weren’t typed up. It may sound quite simple to add onto my work since I already had planned out what I wanted to include. However, I felt that the notions in my mind were all over the place. Over the past week as we were peer reviewing our essays, I started to gather new ideas from some of my classes’ lectures I had that week.
I decided I’d pull out a piece of paper and hand write my brainstorm process again. And as I reached the end of my thoughts, I realized I had an abundance of concepts I wanted to mention. At this point I thought that including all of my ideas would seem overly excessive and confusing to the reader; consequently, I scribbled out certain lines in hopes that it would make the writing process easier. I proved myself wrong going on with this action when I discovered that I still wasn’t satisfied with my composition; the feeling of discouragement settled within me and I suddenly lost interest.
Nonetheless, I completed multiple hours of alterations. Over time, I began to gather more creative ideas again. Trying to find a balance between the matters I want to include as well as staying in accordance with the guidelines presented in this assignment was deemed more difficult than previous writings I had done in the past. I think one of the reasons why this felt like such a struggle for me was the amount of time I had gone on without the opportunity to write freely. In simpler words, I felt limited when it came to expressing my creativity in the past.
Going about my narrative, I wound up going back to my ideas that were crossed out and tried to find that spark of creativity again. I kept reminding myself to avoid clichés and the more broader ideas that most people would assume. Staring up into the sky as I thought hard striked me. I realized I was capable of incorporating my own literary devices with not just my mind of imagination, but with the nature around me too. Often times I would neglect my surroundings in an attempt to focus, but before I can do that, I must zero out the noise and focus on what’s around me first. Doing so granted me ideas that I wouldn’t have thought otherwise. I urged myself to integrate more realistic dialogues of other figures within my piece, and I did, however I found myself rambling on which is another flaw I struggle with.
Aside from the guidelines I focused on and the ideas I had written out, it made me think even deeper about my discourse community. As we write our narrative, I don’t think we realize how much of an impact our communities have had on us. It’s almost a sense of saying to yourself:
Oh my gosh, I’ve made it this far and I wasn’t aware how much I’ve experienced! I’ve never acknowledged that I was living in the moment that would contribute to my exposure to this community.
Taking a trip down my memory lane revealed memories I didn’t know were there; it brought up new realizations and continuously thinking about them made me recognize its importance to include in my essay. It’s possible some of my peers may not agree, but these are the feelings I’ve gathered as I narrated my story. My greatest takeaway from this piece would be the memories that were “renewed” internally. While paying mind to my struggles of writing, learning to dig for the deepest recollections and constantly reflecting upon myself will in fact help me in not just my future writings, but also planting new seeds of confidence within my growing mind.