College itself is a big leap and difference from highschool. In highschool I was able to go to class and just do my work. Never did I ever have to actually go home and study. I always managed to get 85+ on every and anything that I did. Stress wasnt a word in my vocabulary. Now that really has changed. I thought that I could do the same in college. The worth ethic is so much more challenging and there seems to never be enough time to have a social life. I’m a person who is extremely lazy. I either have to sleep at least 8-10 hours or else I wouldnt want to do anything productive the next day.
When you think of college besides all the stress that you hear comes with it, you hear that you will have a lot of fun. I do have some fun times but those experiences were not really the definition of fun for me. I like to hang out with my friends at night, go to parties, and because of this I usually come home really late. This is a problem because the next day I have to wake up at seven just to go to school. In highschool my first class started at 10:30 and my last class ended at 1:30. Along with that, I was only about ten minutes away from my highschool. This is a big difference to what I have to go through now. I guess I can’t complain though, it’s just something that I have to adjust to.
Another thing that is hindering me is the fact that I can’t follow what is going on in class at times. This is a big struggle for me. For as long as I can remember, I always knew the lessons that were going on during class. Never did I ever have to stress about not knowing what was going on in class. Now this is a major set-back for me. It doesn’t make me want to go to the SACC or go to tutoring of any sort. It honestly just makes me want to give up. If I knew what was going on, I’d be motivated to do more work and want to help others. Because I don’t know what is going on I just feel lost. This is not a comfort zone for me. I feel like now that I try to make a come around and try to do my best, my best isn’t good enough. What is there left for me to do? I guess I have to change my study habits and notice what my priorites are. I have to put school before anything because I know that this is my future ahead of me. I’m going to be living my own life. I can’t depend on friends or hanging out to help me out. Cramming the material the night before won’t help me either. At times I think I will feel like college has taken over my life. I don’t want to be stressed out all of the time. I want to be able to have free-time and some time for myself. I guess that comes with time. For now I have to get the hang of things and when I feel comfortable with the way that these things are going maybe I can have some time for myself.
Last, the thing i feel that is hindering me the most is that I feel like I haven’t gotten a break from school at all. It is true that during my senior year of highschool I did only have a few hours of school. But I had a lot of challenging classes that assigned a lot of projects and written assignments. It took alot of my time to get it done. If I was to go home at 1:30 I would still end up doing my work and finishing around 3:30 which is the same time that normal school comes out. The night before the placement test at Baruch, I admit that I did go out with my friends. We ended up partying real late and the next day I woke up with a hangover. I ended up bombing the placement test and a few weeks later, I got a letter in the mail saying that I should take a summer course. I was so pissed. Not only did I have to go to school in the summer, but it started at 9 in the morning. I had to sacrafice alot. During the summer my family likes to take exotic vacations and this summer when we were supposed to go to hawaii again, I had to stay home because I had school. Now that I think back, I’m not going to complain anymore because that’s life. God works in mysterious ways, and hopefully He has great things in store for me.
