Bonjour mes amis! My name is Maggie He and I am afraid of change. I lack confidence, which causes me to become embarrassed extremely easily. I am hypocritical, and a very bad liar. I laugh too much and am oh-so ashamed of my smile! I love shopping & s h o e s. I strive to be a devoted Christian, but materialism always gets in the way. I am the eldest child in my family, but the one with the smallest bed! My sixteen year old sister has had two growth spurts and I have had none; she’s practically 5’8’’! My eight year old brother is ALMOST as tall as me too! I am clearly not the leader of the two but the one with the most responsibilities. As unfortunate as I am , I absolutely love love love them with all my heart. Growing up in Brooklyn for ten years and being taken away from the big family I was so used to seeing everyday and night was definitely a huge contrast to the life I have now. Moving to Staten Island has stripped me of my piano, dancing, and swimming lessons. I have never been able to fully accomplish any of those abilities. I guess that’s why I’m afraid of change? Because changing has impacted my life in so many ways.
My low self esteem has led me to my top three concerns about college. “I’m not smart enough, I can’t do everything that needs to be done.”, “What if no one likes me? How can I differentiate between those who really like me and those who are just trying to be nice?”, “Will all of the hardships of college lead me away from my focus on God??” I know I just have to work harder, “High school is nothing compared to the real life, Maggie!”, so I have been told, “You have to grow up someday!”. Grow up? That’s another major change! ):
My Baruch experience is one hundred percent different from my high school experience. There is definitely more time between classes and everything is so independent, it’s scary! I can feel my mother’s pain while she fills up the car with gas after all those years of driving me to school when I pay for the express to get to Baruch. I need to pay hundreds of dollars for textbooks which compared to high school’s is nothing. Everything is different in my perspective.
The first year in college will change me completely. Being active in classes is a must. Time management is something that will be engraved in my mind for the rest of my life. I have to wake up on time. I have to catch the bus on time. I have to get to class on time. I believe if I try hard enough, I can do anything I set my mind to. Go me!
Absolutely love your 1st paragraph! Its interesting how the oldest child can be the shortest sometimes yet still have so many responsibilities to juggle.
I also very much like the questions/concerns that you raised. It is not easy to determine the real folks from the posers and liars who are fake to your face for lord knows what reason.
Also, I am interested in why you titled your post like this. Please share! =]
Keep blogging and read the posts of your classmates por favor =}.
Being short isn’t always a bad thing 😛 I have many friends who consider themselves short and I always tell them that they should be happy and content with the way they are 🙂 Also, the same thing happened to me when I moved from Queens into Long Island. I lost the opportunity to play violin and guitar, be coached in tennis, and worst of all I lost all of my childhood friends that I grew up with when I was four years old. None of those things should be holding you back from trying to do new things though. Don’t be afraid to try something different! In the long run it can be rewarding 🙂
After reading your blog I find that we have alot in common. I get embarassed quite easily as well making it difficult for me to speak up. I understand your concerns about this new change but sometimes its for the best and we will eventually adjust to it overtime. I hope this new change at Baruch allows you to gain more confidence in yourself in order to help you realize your full potential.
Maggie I also find that we have a lot in common. I know how it feels to try to be a devoted Christian but materialism getting in the way because I to like to shop even though I am guy. How I fear the temptations college life brings will lead me in the wrong path. In middle school I suffered from that idea of do people like me. In middle school I was short and dressed and acted completely different from everyone else due to the fact I went to a completely different middle school from the rest of my friends so I didn’t know if the kids accepted me or just think I am a loser. Also since I am always the loud kid people are constantly telling me to grow up stop acting like a kid your in college you cant do the same things you did in high school. But one thing that helps me block that out is to realize I must stop looking at myself through the eyes of other people if they don’t like me forget them, they just telling you to grow up because they are made they got old and have no youth. Don’t be ashamed of your smile your smile is amazing everyday when I walk in to school completely dead in the morning and I see your bright cheerful smile it brightens up my day I wish I smiled as much as you did. I hate change as well but change is the only constant in life, and as long as you have friends (which I consider myself a friend of yours) they will help you embrace the change as well as stay on track in high school. As for your confidence learn to walk like a pigeon because a pigeon poops were ever he wants and doesn’t care he is that confident. YES GO YOU MAGGIE
Hey Maggie, I agree with what Evan and Juan have said. Don’t let change stop you from doing something new, and honestly thats what I like most about change. I think it works to the benefit of us to not get used to just the same thing. “Too much of anything isn’t good for you.” And what Juan said is very true as well. Your friends will always make change an easier transition, and I look forward to all of us being friends.
Goodluck Maggie! Hope you can the best you can!