LC 14

I am a daughter, niece, cousin, granddaughter, and friend. I try to please everyone. I hate when I disappoint someone. When I try my best, it’s sometimes never good enough. I value my education, family, and friends. At the end of the day all I have is those three. I miss my carefree days when all I had to worry about was getting good grads which was easy for me since I learned pretty fast. I miss my childhood evenings where every evening we would go out to play. I miss some of my friendships. I don’t know where, how, or when those friendships ended. Even if I tried to fix it, I guess things will never be the same.

a. I don’t see myself any differently post-monologue.

b. I have been made aware of all the different things Baruch has to offer and I feel that we grew as an LC.

I still see myself as a senior in high school even though graduation was one heck of a bittersweet day.

I see myself as someone who is in need of a lot of things. I know no one is just going to hand it to me. I finally realized that  I need to get my act together and start doing what  I need to do. I guess through freshmen seminar I was able to get to know my classmates a little bit better and learned a lot of things about Baruch.

I want to go home. Why am I still here? It’s not like I hate the people here, they seem to be a nice group of people. I know I have to do well in school, but I lack the motivation to do so. Classes are getting harder, but I find myself to be a slacker. I don’t have a social life here, nor do I get good grades. I guess I’m just a sleeper according to that chart that Ana Lucia showed us. If there is one thing that I truly love, it has to be basketball. That one word could put the biggest smile on my face and make me forget about my problems. Kobe Bryant, my role model. I wouldn’t have an answer for you if you would have asked me the difference between college and high school. Actually in high school I guess I had more of a social life. But that’s about it. Pen to paper. Pen to paper. That’s all that I hear right now. One thing that I truly fear is bugs. Yea. People ask me, how can you be so afraid of bugs? I mean look at me.. I’m a pretty big guy yet I still fear those tiny creatures that fly around. It’s getting better though. I need money. I need a job. I need some friends. I’m a needy guy. I hate being sick. I have a weak immune system. That’s what I hate about myself. But I like the fact that I get sick a lot because then my girlfriend has to come take care of me. Oh, I forgot to introduce myself. My name is Matthew Song.

In the past five weeks, I have gone through at lot of experiences. I was exposed to a whole new type of school social life for one. In high school, I knew everyone. My graduating class was less than two hundred students. At Baruch, there are thousands of students. Although I have met a lot of new people, I still rarely run into anyone I know because there are so many people. I love seeing new faces. It makes me wonder who the people behind these faces really are. This is why I love getting to know new people. Everyone I’ve met at Baruch so far is pretty open about their experiences and interests, which I love hearing about. Meeting new people has definitely been my favorite aspect of college life so far.

Post-monologue I still see myself as the same person, but I’m glad that I got to talk about how much I’ve enjoyed meeting everyone. People don’t get to show their appreciation for meeting someone new too often. I’m glad I got to share that information with some of my newest friends, my peers in LC14.

Free writing has been my main form of development in freshmen seminar. It’s a nice way to talk about the things on your mind. It’s also nice to be guided by questions. This opens your mind to simple questions that you, surprisingly, do not ask yourself as often as you should.

I am a sister, I am an aunt, I am a best friend. I’m a joker, I’m a writer, I’m a thinker. I am complex, but I like the adjective “colorful” better. I’m really comfortable with who I am and with the friendships I’m making. As for my grades, I’ve been working really hard and pushing myself to do well. Although I dropped Calc for pre-calc, I’m still worried about math. Math is really not my subject. I work better with words than with numbers. I like breaking molds and doing what people don’t expect. Most of the girls in my school go to Brooklyn college, but I decided to come here instead. Being “on my own” gives me an opportunity to grow and develop as a person apart from the community I live in. But I miss my friends. I wish I had more time to hang out with them. I wish I had more time for myself too. In college it’s pretty easy to feel lost in the crowd, but I just think of the song “shine on” by The Kooks and I don’t let anything dim my inner shine. I just really I want to have fun!! I’ve had tons of fun so far, and I’m finally starting to get excited about college.

—I’m sort of weird, but I love that about myself. I can ALWAYS make myself laugh 🙂 I think of myself as pretty open to talking about myself. I like to share things, and I like when people share things with me. I liked hearing people’s monologues because it gave me a sense of who they are. Also I realized that a lot of us are struggling with the same problems in college which is very comforting. Freshman seminar kinda taught me that none of us are alone. We’re all going through similar things, so we should all be there for each other. I don’t think Freshman seminar has changed me, I think it just taught me more about my surroundings and has made me more comfortable at Baruch. Is that considered change? I don’t really know lol….

 I loveee being silly! Especially with my friends, we can get reaaaaallly wild lol. We may embarras ourselves at times, but if we’re having fun we don’t really care

My monologue:

HOW’S IT GOING? THANKS FOR ASKING. IT’S OK I SUPPOSE. IF YOU’RE WONDERING WHY I AM WRITING IN CAPS, IT’S BECAUSE I LIKE TO FEEL LIKE I’M YELLING BUT NOT ACTUALLY BE DOING IT. Well, at least I hope I’m funny. People tell me I am. But then again, people always tell you nice stuff at least to your face. I hate the way I treat people sometimes. My family is super super important to me because I owe them so much. I would be nowhere and have no motivation without them. I know that sounds cheesy and stupid but I’m completely serious. I enjoy meeting new people. There’s so many different people here. I love it. Gosh I wanna get better already! I hate colds. I’d rather have a fever than a cold. Cause i can just sleep off fevers then I’m all better. Colds last like 1-2 weeks. It’s torture. FREAKING TORTURE. My personal motto or theme song…Life’s tough, get a helmet. Those are words I live by.

Post monologue: I see myself as sorta weird I guess. I’m kinda random a lot of the time. And as i was listening to all the monologues and writing the free write afterwards, I realized that I laugh at almost everything even if its completely inappropriate. ugh. lol but i just can’t help it. So sorry if i offended everyone by all my laughter. I guess i’ve developed quite nicely in freshman seminar? I like that it gives you a lot of tips about classes cause some of them turn out to be kinda helpful. And i feel like i’ve learned so much more about everybody in LC14. so that’s pretty nice.

I see myself as silly, funny, and i wanna say fun to be around? but maybe i'm not all those things. who knows. and that's my dad btw.

Doc2

When I started college this fall, I started a new stage in my life that meant a lot of change was coming. For one, I was definitely growing up and forever putting my childhood days behind me. Now I feel like I have to be mature all the time and have my focus for my future clear. All that could be overwhelming and some days I feel like there are a ton of bricks being piled on top of me one. This makes me afraid of the things that lay ahead. On the one hand I’m excited about graduating college, and being self-sufficient. On the other, I want to rewind time or maybe just slow it down a little. Just the other day, I remember walking into the new halls of my highschool as a freshman student. And four years later I’m here again.  I don’t want to get so caught up that I forget to enjoy life and remember all the important things like friends and family and love. Lately, I feel like I am always running out of time. I guess that’s just something I have to get used to. Anyway, I admit to being nervous but I am mostly excited.

so its been really hectic trying to manage everything, but I think I can deal with it. 🙂 I like the clubs so far. But I feel like I should be doing something productive. Like a businesses sorority..(or not) Coming to Baruch… I dont regret my decisions but still I feel like the opportunities are very limited here. I felt proud– first of all, when I got into colleges..which I highly doubted during my last semesters.  I was concerned with the whole “college” thing– I knew that my experiences in high school havenot prepared me enough. In some classes I feel like Im behind..already; hmm.. OH  “Learning Communities” is a very good idea. I feel that the friends i met here will be the ones that i would end up going to. 😛

After Monologues: I don’t feel any different, but I did learn what other people were thinking 🙂 which I related to alot. Freshman Seminar is …good.. for freshmans.. 😛 I learned of all the different things I wasn’t aware of.

Being in college is currently enjoyable. Being thing about college is the freedom. Freedom to choose your class and teachers, freedom from being told what to do. This new-found freedom makes me more responsible. I hate listening to other people telling me what to do, i like deciding for myself whether it is necessary or helpful for me to do it. Being taught by actual intellectuals is a nice change of pace. In highschool most teachers lacked the intelligence needed to understand their own material. They just recite what they read in a textbook. I feel that college professors are generally intellectuals for whom i may garner some respect. This makes learning and listening easier as well as more enjoyable. As for the work load it is far easier and less then i was led to believe in H.S. The work is overestimated compared to what i had in my AP classes in highschool. However the material is more challenging as well as we have to learn more in one month of college then in 4 months of highschool. Im enjoyign and having fun i ncollege atm.

a. Nothing new. I dislike talking about myself and nothing can change that. Still see myself exactly the same, nothing else i can add to this

b. No change… nope… nothing at all… is there supposed to be a change? if there is im quite lost on where exactly we should have changed. Still exactly the same as i was in my senior year of highschool.

c. Karsa Orlong, from Malazan: Book of the Fallen, a character i like and respect and feel like i can compare and relate to him. An extremely sneaky and clever character who carries demons with him wherever he goes. He believes himself a monster but he always manages to do the right thing and fights on the right side. It is him against the world and he always ends up winning. He is a huge braggart but he always manages to back his words up. He doesnt care who he pisses off because, in his eyes, hes the best there is and no one can stop or hold him down.

Karsa Orlong