Hmm, I sit here thinking, what to write, what to write… and realize the annoyance of my indecisive personality. Usually, I don’t mind being indecisive, it provokes a curious side of me and I learn lots of things through it by skepticism and criticism. I also can get away with not actually having to pick sometimes. However, obviously there are times when I inexcusably have to side with a certain wing of a dilemma and make a decision.
I used to think that my indecisiveness was due to my carelessness, but I don’t think I’m so careless as I used to think I am. So I’m often left wondering whether I’m indecisive because I don’t care or because I care too much and don’t want the responsibility of possibly having made the wrong decision.
I’m not picky, I don’t care what I eat for dinner or where I eat, as long as it tastes good and fills up my stomach. I don’t care what we do when we hang out, whether it’s going to the movies, shopping, beach, volleyball or just staying in and playing Wii, as long as we spend some time together and have fun. I do care however about my grades, taking care of my responsibilities, and the overall consequences of my actions.
Learning about all the different kinds of decision-making ideologies in my ethics class, like ethical egoism and consequentialism, I realize that I’m not as odd as I sometimes think. It’s not like I’m indecisive about every singe action that I take. Most of what I do is pretty straightforward. So I think I can easily conclude by saying my indecisiveness splits into two parts. Sometimes I’m indecisive because it’s something so small that it really doesn’t require me to do any thinking. Other times I’m indecisive because my decision actually matters and I worry about the results. With that said, I’d prefer you not ask me to make decisions… and not call me a hypocrite if I criticize yours.
I chose this picture because it represents a small part of me. I love taking jumping pictures; I think that a picture of a person in the air is so lively, exciting and natural. It puts a smile on your face every time you look at it just because it looks like fun and stupid simultaneously to jump for a picture. I love the process because it’s always associated with laughter, silliness, childishness and it creates unforgettable memories that you think of every time you look at the picture.
I also love the beach, especially at sunset. It helps to live right next to the beach because I have the opportunity to go out whenever I want, to just sit on the beach or walk around on the boardwalk. The reason I like it so much is because it’s the perfect place to ponder, the calming sound of the water and the sun shining on the water as it sets, help the flow of your thoughts and relieve you of any concerns.
The two descriptions are completely contradictory and that’s the beauty of it, its like yin and yang. I love being loud and obnoxious with my friends because its fun but I also love the relaxing affect of nature. This might be a little insight as to why my best friend calls me a living contradiction. 🙂