How you telling me the sky is the limit when there’s footprints on the moon?
Hai, I’m Elvin. To begin to define who I am, I wouldn’t even know where to start. To scratch the surface, I suppose I’m a 17 year-old, Chinese-American, attending Baruch College. The glass is always half-full for me, and I try to always maintain my joyous attitude. I strive for success but I lack motivation. I’m sleep-deprived almost all the time, it’s like I have permanent jet-lag, but I get by. I like getting my name out and network as much as possible, it’s not so much attention I want, but recognition, reputation, and respect. I’m proud of who I became through the struggle of identity I had throughout my life. With the guidance of God, I’m so much closer to the person I imagine myself to be. I trust others easily and I open up to others a lot. I don’t like being labeled, it’s stupid and juvenile. I’m a bit self-conscious about how I present myself to others but who isn’t, right? Oh, and I have terrible commitment issues.
Baruch College is a new chapter in my life. My major concerns for this chapter is responsibility, failure, and change. College to me represents more responsibility, as a student, as an adult, and as an individual. As a student, there’s no more calls or letters to my parents from my teachers stating that I’m borderline-failing their class. I am responsible for my own grades, for handing papers in on time, for double-checking when I have an exam. I need to step it up and prove myself that I can be responsible for my academics, employment, and taking care of myself. Another concern I have is failure. Failure to me is unacceptable but the lack of motivation contradicts this. As much as I hate failure, and strive to be successful, I just don’t have motivation to push myself. The support from my friends and family only goes so far and I need to pull my weight and shoot for the stars. I refuse to fail and I won’t allow it to happen while I’m here at Baruch. The last concern I have is change. I want to change for the better. I’m not a perfect person, actually I’m far from it. But I work to make myself better day by day.
Obviously college is an entirely different experience than high school. The 4000 student body of Bronx High School of Science is incomparable to the 17000 student body of Baruch College. Because it was a smaller environment, people knew of and spoke to each other more often than how it is in Baruch College. The classes in Baruch College is also different in that the class will move on whether you fully comprehend the lesson or not. In high school, the class would go over lessons that caused confusion among the students. I feel that in high school, we were pushed to go to class every day, do our work, and pay attention. Contrarily, in college we choose to attend class, take effective notes, and study.
I think the first year at Baruch College will shape me into a more responsible, respectful young adult. Hopefully I will learn to mange my time better, and complete my academic work in a timely fashion. I think Baruch College will be a stepping stone to a successful future for me. I hope the changes will be positive toward becoming a better individual.
I’m walking on air, living on a prayer.
I look up at the sky, and I feel like a millionaire.