Who Are WE? We're PR3!

I found the panel discussion to be quite boring so honestly, I can not really say I did not doze off during it, but I did hear something about reality while Charles Li was speaking, which had me wondering about it myself.  Reality has a lot to do with life.  Generally our perception of reality changes as we grow during our lives.  In my eyes, as youths we tend to often live in a fantasy world, whether it be because we are ignorant, oblivious or anything else.  As we grow older, we mature and start thinking about our responsibilities and realize we have to take control of our futures.  So, in our adult years reality kicks in and we see the world in a new light where more is expected of us.  Later in life if you become old and senile then life once again is a fantasy.  I think that is a problem with many people today, they do not live in reality until it kicks their ass and by then, sometimes it is too late.

I’m a naturally shy and quiet individual.  The thing I like most about myself is that I’m an honest, genuine person and if I care about you, it won’t be hard to figure out, the same goes for if I don’t particularly like you.  Another thing I like is that I’ll always be myself and that I won’t change for the approval of anyone.  One of my qualities that I’m not all that fond of is my laziness; it tends to prevent me from doing as well as I could.  Procrastination has never helped me and though it has developed into a habit, I know I can change it.  Another bad habit I have is that in order for me to do well, I usually have to do bad first before I have a motive to do well.

The most important things in my life are family and friends because I know I can always rely on them or confide in them whenever I have a problem.  Besides my family and friends, music and sports, in particular basketball has a big impact on who I am.  I watch games whenever they’re on and play in the park when I have time.  Music is sort of my escape from everything because it helps me relax and focus.

What I’m afraid of most is losing the things I care about most because when you really care about something, you develop an attachment that is nearly impossible to let go.  To me, losing something I care about is like losing apart of yourself, so that is why my personal motto is to “Cherish the moments that make you happy.” My mentality is that if there’s no happiness in life what else is there to live for.  Without happiness all that’s left is pain, regret, and sorrow.

It’s always hard to take a look at yourself and define who you are.  I see myself as an Asian American male who tries to go above certain expectations  of those who know me.  Not because I aim to please them but because I know it’ll benefit me in the future.  I often find myself exploring because I’m not sure if i have a set identity.  As I live my life, I change and I think that’s one of the hardest things in life to accept.  We all have our moments in life and some wish that they could just stay in the period for the rest of our lives.

One of my concerns as a freshman at Baruch College is that I won’t be able to push myself to use my time efficiently and do my task before the last minute.  I’m a lazy individual so doing everything I have to is almost never an option.  Another one of my concerns is that I may not pass everything because I’m not one to study or exactly do everything I’m supposed to.  I fell under the impression that if I just go to class then it’ll all be alright because of my past education.  Clearly that’s not going to happen.  The last concern of mine is that I’ve heard we have to do all these presentations in our later classes and years, and I’m guessing it won’t be easy for me because I’m naturally a shy person.

I think my experience in college will be different from high school in that I’ll have a lot more freedom and no one will be there to guide you and help if don’t want to seek out help by yourself.  Also that the courses will be more demanding and the work will be more detailed.  I guess since we are paying for our education, it’s expected that we want to be in college and we find our own way to succeeding and actually learning.  Another difference I see is that everyone is focused unlike high school where everyone is forced to be there and I guess it creates a different environment and vibe.

I think my first year at college will have a few surprises with my courses and how college will impact my life.  My first year will probably make me more responsible in regards to my time management and my ability to accept the fact that I have to set my priorities.   College is like another portion in my life because every experience changes you whether it be good or bad.  With all the expectations of the students to do well and use what they learn to help out in their careers, I find it kind out hard to believe that I will become one of those people.  It’s not exactly who I am but I guess college is already changing me because otherwise I would be writing this blog at a different time.