I am my own person.

I’m Gabbie.

She’s Jackie.

My sister and I were born together, making us twins.

We were raised together, making us sisters.

But like everyone else, we have our distinctions.

I have my likes and dislikes and so does she.

I like food and going out with friends.

She likes dieting and staying indoors.

I’m into romance and drama, while she’s into action and sci-fi.

I love the water and being able to tan,

Jackie prefers whitening lotion and covering every piece of skin.

We even look different:

I’m shorter with wavy hair and darker skin.

She’s taller with long straight hair and lighter skin.

I prefer the casual look with just a hoodie and pair of jeans,

She likes dressing up in skirts and heels.

We even went to different schools, making separate friends.

Trying to create an identity for ourselves.

But everyone seems to still classify us as one.

It’s become annoying and stressful.

It sometimes feels like I’m being forced to have both of out personalities.

My name isn’t “Twin” or “Kambal”-

I’m Gabbie.

She’s Jackie.

Stop calling me one of the twins.

That’s not my name.

College is very different from high school. First, the whole atmosphere is different, you are treated with more respect and the people around you are very mature. You are also very independent in college. In high school, I was able to get away with not doing most of my work and fooling around, but in college, the work is very serious. For the past few weeks, I had a chance to think to myself and realize how much responsibilities I have. So far everyone I met is very nice and I hope to meet more people like that. I am both scared and excited for the future experiences I will face in college.

I have all the time in the world, yet that clock keeps ticking. I close my eyes in an attempt to disregard it, but I can’t seem to block out the sound, that omnipresent tick. I open them once again to find that my whole world has stopped moving. I’m the only one not frozen, yet I don’t have it in me to move. Only my head is mobile, turning from side to side. But somehow, I don’t know what’s left from right, my mind failing to make sense of any direction. Somehow, I get one of my feet to step forward, the other one following slowly. I walk until identical doors suddenly appear in front of me. They have glass windows, however, all giving me previews of different trails. I stare blankly at them all, taking my time to decide which knob to turn.

But I hear the ticking again and I look up to see another clock. It seems to be floating in midair, pressuring me to pick a path. Overwhelmed by all my options, the same foot that stepped forward earlier now takes a step back. I find myself once again searching for something, when I finally find it: a simple, black button with the word “Success” in white, bold letters. It’s floating, too, and when I try to reach up to press it, it moves away. The button passes through the window of one of the doors. And in a hasty attempt to follow it, I open the same door and run through it, keeping my eye on that elusive button. Once I go through the doorway, however, the door in its entirety disappears. I look around my new environment and realize that the button chose for me. Did the button actually exist? I push the question into the back of my mind as I take it all in. Maybe I’ll learn to like it here.

The hardest thing in life is losing someone that is close to you it changes the way you act and live your everyday life. Every second you are thinking it can all be taken away from you because you have had that feeling before.  It also changes the way you think you start to do the things that you enjoy and stop worrying about what others around you will think.  Losing someone is a life changing experience because it shows you what is really important you start to focus on the big picture and not the little things in life.

Everyone has had an event that has changed his or her life and mine was when I started college. For most students, entering college is a scary and overwhelming experience. This is because most people are afraid of the unknown. Not knowing if you’ll make friends. Not knowing if you’ll do well. Just not knowing anything.

The transition from high-school to college was rough. Many changes were happening around me and they were all happening so fast. I would no longer be with the same people I’ve come to grow close with for years. I would no longer be told where to go at what time and I would no longer have my parents take care of my problems. I was now an adult. Nobody would constantly check up on me and make sure I was doing what I supposed to. I had to take care of myself.

Going to college changed my life a lot. It transformed me from a little boy to an adult and it taught me many things. College taught me to stick up for myself. College taught me how to manage my time correctly. But overall, college taught me responsibility. I am my own person now and I will keep changing as I experience new things. THIS IS HOW I VIEW MYSELF

Guys, we should start taking down our tent. It’s our last day out in the open – let’s finish this right. Remind me to say something at our meeting later today. I wrote something I want to share with you.

I’m happy the trip is close to over – mostly. I enjoy the carefree nature of the wilderness. I enjoy how days end as quickly as they started and I enjoy being free to do as I wish out here. But life out here gets repetitive. Setting up a tent, preparing food, digging cat-holes, walking for hours on end can only happen so much before it becomes a bore. The tundra all looks the same. It’s beautiful but its beauty is so abundant; it’s easy to grow tired of it. Every day there is a view of the mountains and clouds that are always at least partly cloudy. Occasionally those mountains will be covered in snow but that’s as diverse as the scenery gets. The Jacksina is brown everywhere, even where it starts. Rocky drainages and creeks in other places only provide so much clear water. The only other scene that is different is the dense forestry that forces us to bushwhack, but the immediate threat of a bear, and the chore that is bushwhacking distracts one from the beauty of the forest.

Hiking began as something we had to do. Sometime during this trip it became something we enjoyed doing. However, towards the end people started forging their own intimacy barriers. This made hiking feel like a chore again. People are too scared or unwilling to show how they truly feel. They are also unwilling to share experiences too personal to them. This intimacy barrier hinders us from getting to know one another to the best of our abilities. Once a person decides to close up, once he has exhausted all he is willing to share, the relationship becomes more focused on the present.

But maybe that’s a good thing out here. Maybe it’s OK to only live in the present – away from past regrets and disappointments and away from future anxieties. Maybe it’s OK to live life one task at a time and rather than focus on the past of a person, to focus on their growth happening right before your eyes. That’s true beauty.

I feel my mother’s tight grip on my hand and watch my father’s back as he is running down an enormous hall, pushing his way through the crowd. It has been such a long flight. Almost twelve hours of crowded seats, awful food and that dreadful lift off and landing when your ears get clogged. But now we are finally here. My heart sinks as I discover that this is no vacation; we’re here to stay. We get out of the airport only to find out that the streets are worse than the crowded airport. The pavement is covered in trash, the buildings are tall and grey and it so cold outside, in September! The people here are nothing like the people back home. Nobody smiles, everyone looks unhappy, and not one person has stopped to pinch my cheeks and tell me how cute I look. I am in New York City at the age of four, and I hate it here

Moving from Long Island to New York City was the biggest change I’ve ever had to face. The past 18 years I’ve lived with my parents and brother, so moving out to live with my roommate in a city we lived only 2 hours away, from but barley knew was scary. I was lucky enough to room with my best friend from high school, so it made the experience a little easier. I went from doing everything with my family to doing it on my own but with my best friend by my side. I finally realized what real responsibility felt like and I was living a whole new life. I felt a sense of freedom the day our families left us in our new home located on the Upper East Side. Overall living on my own has been a huge change, but an amazing one. Even though it’s only been a little over 2 months, I believed I’ve grown up and have become a new, independent person.

I have a hard time accepting my Chinese culture because of stereotypes. When people say all Asians are nerds, I feel annoyed, but at the same time, impartial. Most Asians would take pride in that comment by saying that we are naturally smart, but I believe our culture pushes us to strive and do the best we can in anything we do. Living my life in a city, with everyone being as judgmental as they are, has made the struggle to accept my heritage easy and hard. Being in a city means that there is diversity, and yet, there are still stereotypes that differentiate each race.
Walking down the street and having people yell, “Ching chong chang” or “Ni hao” as I walk by is ironic in my eyes. Due to family mishaps when I was younger, I do not know much Chinese; I understand very little and barely know how to reply in Chinese. As much as it shouldn’t bother me, it actually does, which makes me respond to them. Why should I have to live like that when I would never want to make anyone feel inferior because of their culture? No one expects a little Asian girl to talk back to them and stand up for herself. This shocks most of them to the point where they are speechless and walk away, but others may add another comment. I do not understand what people get out of making other people feel bad, much less someone you do not know. There are certain instances in which I will get into an argument with someone over a comment they make about any Asian, and then there are others who just make stupid assumptions and I am just left standing there, speechless. I’ve just learned to stand up for myself, and my culture, dealing with judgmental people along the way.
Most people have said to me that their comments are not meant to be offensive, but they will never know the effect of their words on a person. Everyone has their own opinions on different matters, so how are their comments any different? Learning from my own experiences, I have learned to try not to judge anyone by anything that would be discriminating. It’s hard because oddly enough, some people might fit into their stereotype, which is probably why they exist. But even so, I would never make anyone feel bad about their culture, race or beliefs. I have always tried to be the bigger person. This has also made me appreciate the friends that I do have, that accept me for all my flaws. As the years progressed, I realized that my culture is something I shouldn’t be ashamed of.

I feel like I am very hard on myself when it comes to my grades because it was engraved into my mind ever since I started school, and honestly this is pretty accurate…