Author Archives: fj144823

I still don’t give a fuck. It’s really not that bad here, but its not that great either. I guess I’ll try out some clubs during fall term and see how that goes for me since I didn’t really do any of that yet. Classes aren’t that bad (as yet) but most of the work I just don’t care about. Common core classes shouldn’t be allowed to give any out of class assignments. But for the most part people here are pretty chill, and I am slowly getting motivated to care about stuff, so hopefully next term will be better. Cause if it’s not I’m probably gonna dip. Nah I’ll probably just switch to part time student if it sucks. Yeah that’s it.

About the pic: I got it from a Google search but here’s the original website link, or at least the one that was pulled up by the search.

http://www.motifake.com/facebookview.php?id=41810

I still don’t give a fuck. It’s really not that bad here, but its not that great either. I guess I’ll try out some clubs during fall term and see how that goes for me since I didn’t really do any of that yet. Classes aren’t that bad (as yet) but most of the work I just don’t care about. Common core classes shouldn’t be allowed to give any out of class assignments. But for the most part people here are pretty chill, and I am slowly getting motivated to care about stuff, so hopefully next term will be better. Cause if it’s not I’m probably gonna dip. Nah I’ll probably just switch to part time student if it sucks. Yeah that’s it.

About the pic: I got it from a Google search but here’s the original website link, or at least the one that was pulled up by the search.

http://www.motifake.com/facebookview.php?id=41810

actionplan

1. I didn’t really learn anything new about myself. Most of the things it told me are what i already knew but just never thought about.
2. It told me things I was already planning to do.
3. It let me know that there a definitely more options available to me than what I had planned.

actionplan

1. I didn’t really learn anything new about myself. Most of the things it told me are what i already knew but just never thought about.
2. It told me things I was already planning to do.
3. It let me know that there a definitely more options available to me than what I had planned.

actionplan

1. I didn’t really learn anything new about myself. Most of the things it told me are what i already knew but just never thought about.
2. It told me things I was already planning to do.
3. It let me know that there a definitely more options available to me than what I had planned.

I don’t know man, I really don’t. I thought I was going places; I was going to make it big. Then it all went away. I don’t even know what happened. It seems I should go home and tell my mom I’m a failure, that I wasn’t good enough. But that won’t do. I’m not a failure. How can I fail if I haven’t even attempted anything? Yeah, I was going to make it big, but make it big in what? I never had a plan, but more importantly I don’t think I ever wanted a plan. Maybe just hanging on to that sentiment was enough. Hanging on to the feeling that I was making a difference was fulfilling. And I never really cared that I wasn’t actually doing anything. And I don’t really care now either, to be honest.
I guess sometimes you ask yourself questions that you already know the answers to just to feel better. I just want to live my life. I want to have fun with my family and friends, the people I care about, and not worry about much. But there’s so much to worry about, and I just can’t bring myself to worry about it. Getting an education so I can get a job to support me is something that I should probably find important. I don’t find it that important at all.
Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying the world doesn’t need progress. The key to moving society forward is definitely education. But does that mean that everyone is cut out to push society forward? I don’t think so. It’s definitely not for me. Some might say that makes me a bad person. Maybe it does. But is education really the only way? As a society we’ve become so focused on technology and progress, on money, that we’ve forgotten our fundamentals. People don’t seem to enjoy life the same way I do.
Maybe it’s just a problem of the times changing. Maybe I’m just bad with keeping up. But I don’t really need to keep up. It should definitely be reasonable for everyone to coexist, leading different types of lifestyles, but it’s becoming harder by the day. Society has a way of making us focus on things such as getting a degree, or settling down. I just want to adventure. I want to experience the world in its natural state, to go around having exciting experiences, meeting interesting people. Granted, it is definitely possible to do these things in today’s society, but it still doesn’t warrant a sense of carefree-ness. Yeah, I think I just made up a word, but it’s accurate.
I guess I’ll just have to deal with it. Maybe it’s just a problem of me not experiencing enough yet. There’s probably something that I’ll find enjoyable. That’s part of the reason I’m even in college. I’d be content with just a regular job, just getting by, but I really want to gain more perspective. I’m sure everything will work out.

The piece that I liked the most at the Rubin museum was the Lotus Mandala of Hevajra. To be honest, at the time I am writing this, I don’t even completely remember what it looks like. I also don’t know what its actual religious meaning/purpose is. All i remember is that it looked cool. It was such a complex piece yet it wasn’t very large, which made me think of all the hard work that the craftsman had to put into it. There were many elements to it, but it was simple. It presents a powerful image from the moment you look at it. I think it was the most beautiful piece there.

http://grooveshark.com/playlist/Me/83581008

These songs don’t generally define me too well, since I listen to (or I like to think I listen to) a wide variety of music. What I have here are just a few tracks I have jammed to recently, but for the most part they either describe who i am now or a side of me that I might let out eventually.

Careless Whisper – George Michael : This has been my jam since the beginning of time. There’s a certain part of me that likes grooving to slow music, and if I was ever to start acting all smooth and suave, this would be my anthem.

I Will Survive – Gloria Gaynor : This is a powerful song. I am powerful. Nuff said.

Shadows – Lindsey Stirling : Right now, I’m at a point in my life where I am content with simply drifting along life and taking things the way they come (I phrased that pretty un-elegantly but w/e). The title of this song kinda says it all, and the actual music does well to portray it.

Bizarre Love Triangle – New Order : This song makes me happy. Idk. If I were an artist I would make music like this.

Maniac – Michael Sembello : Oh. This one doesn’t really define me. I guess it’s a good party song but I really like relaxing to it.

Don’t Stop Me Now – Queen : This is just as powerful a song as I Will Survive. Some might even call it strong. I am powerful. Some might even call me strong(loljk -_-). But yeah.

Many Men – 50 Cent : I grew up somewhat close to the south Bronx. This is the thug in me. Naw not really, but this song is bad@$$ anyway, and I would like to be that bad@$$ someday.

Fresh Vegetable – Tony Rebel : I’m Guyanese so I grew up with the Caribbean vibes. I f***s with the dancehall side of reggae as well but I like the slower songs too.

Self Control – Laura Branigan : Sometimes I feel really cool and way more important than I am for no reason. I feel empowered when I listen to this. The lyrics are great too.

Propane Nightmares – Pendulum : I can’t relate at all to what this song is saying, but it has a nice sound for jogging.

So yeah. That’s me in a playlist. Kinda. Meh.