My first essay.
Enjoy.
Will you marry me for twenty thousand dollars?
The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence.
(Proverb)
“No, God, no! Why??” I opened my eyes and saw a silhouette of Anna on the floor in the middle of my room. I jumped off the bed, went on my knees, stretched my hands towards her, afraid to touch her. “What happened?” I could hear my heart beat now. “Aaa hen djin geen” Anna’s red eyes were full of tears, her face was all wet and her mouth was stretched in a grim of sorrow. “What is going on?” Rape? Robbery? Violence?- flashed in my head. “He did it again! We just had sex in the car on the parking lot, and then told me he has a new girlfriend who lives with him and sleeps in our bed!” I went to the kitchen to get some Valerian root pills. I gave her three.
Anna came to the US from Russia 6 years ago for the summer to work as a nanny. She realized that she wants to stay in this country and the easiest way for her was to get married. “By the time you find a real husband, you may turn forty and I want my green card now”, she told me, that’s why she went for a “paper marriage” and her husband charged her 20 k, frequent sex and took her heart as an add-on. In order for the officer to believe them, they had to live together, which made them both happy for about a year, when after, as it always happens, their happiness was shattered by an everyday life. He started staying at work a little longer, she forgot when was the last time they went out together. Anna became paranoid: looking through their mutual bank account to see what he was doing, where he was spending time, read his e-mails and texts. Eventually she got her green card and soon is getting her passport. But was it worth it?
“What do you mean, he died?” screamed Svetlana in her phone. “-When did he die? Why nobody told me? What am I gonna do now?” She did not even ask why or how he died, she knew it was an overdose or death in prison- people of this kind do not have much of a choice, they all end up the same way.
Lack of work and her sick mother made her leave Russia and search for any job, so Svetlana became a go-go dancer in New York City. She was dreaming about a green card now, life in Russia did not seem to be a future for her, so she started looking for a husband. She realized soon that not only good husbands, but husbands in general are hard to find, and in her situation she was ready to marry whoever, even a bad guy, even to pay him to do that, and that was exactly what happened.
Igor was introduced to her by a mutual friend. She bought his black suit and a nice car. Later she bought their marriage. They started living together. A flow of shady people went through her apartment. Skinny, poorly dressed “friends” sneaked into his room and left with their eyes wild. “I dont know what drugs he was doing, but he was bad” she told me. “He was very aggressive, did not want to speak, did not show up on the interview for their green card and was stealing money from me. And then my hubby died.” She said she only got her papers because the officer saw everything she went through in her eyes and felt bad for her.
“What? You dont have a passport?” Victorias eyes rounded as red spots came out all over her face and neck. She felt like he was ruining her future she has been building all these years. “You went for a marriage to make me an American citizen and you have no passport?”
” I dont have money to get it, I dont work, you know.”
Victoria was so tired of working in restaurants that one day after she saved the required sum she married a guy she barely knew anything about. She saw him once before, he looked OK to her. Later she found out he never worked, does not have money to pay the rent, lives with his parents and multiple sisters, never got any degree, and those several thousand dollars she paid him was the biggest amount he ever had. And only for a couple of days.
“I hope he does not withdraw all the money from our mutual account” she told me once. “Ha ha ha, thats so fucking hilarious!” Tyrone was snorting and squealing on a couch with a huge pack of Cheetos and bright red Kool-Aid while watching Harlem Shake videos. “Does this kid even know what a bank account is?” went in my head.
This couple has not had their interview yet, but Victoria is doing everything possible for her dream to come true while Tyrone is playing video games and probably does not even remember her last name.
We always think its always better somewhere else, not where you are now. We think life is easier in a different country, but most of the times we are mistaken. The failure does not live in a particular country, it lives in you and it will follow you anywhere you run from it. Some choose to do anything to stay in America, obeying all religious and moral canons. And what are we left with? A green card and a future or a lie and a solitude? Is it better to marry a real man and start a family or a country where no one needs you? Its up to you.
