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Ronny Berlin- Communication

Baruch College

MGT 3120 Abe Tawil

Powerful Communications Skills

Presented by:

Ronny Berlin, Helix Consulting LLC

ü   Increase Communication Opportunities

ü   Improve Interpersonal Skills

ü   Develop Positive Interactions

ü   Anticipate Misunderstandings

Ronny Helicher Berlin, M.A.

Ronny H. Berlin has over twenty-five years experience as an entrepreneur, mediator, consultant, trainer and coach.  Along with her extensive mediation practice, she specializes in designing ADR systems and workshops emphasizing the effect of behavioral styles in the workplace.

Ms. Berlin serves as a mediator on the Blue Ribbon Panel for the U.S. Postal Service redress program, and is a contract mediator and trainer for the EEOC focusing on discrimination and sexual harassment cases.  She also mediates family and divorce cases, as well as workplace issues and employee disputes for the FAA.  Ms. Berlin is a certified mediator with the NYS Unified Court System mediating victim-offender, custody and community cases for both the courts and the Queens Mediation Center.

In her private mediation practice, Ms. Berlin addresses workplace conflict and mediates in the area of security, healthcare, education, manufacturing, municipalities and building management.  Ms. Berlin has been a guest lecturer in mediation at Cornell University-School of Industrial and Labor Relations and worked with Mayor Giuliani’s office on the Alternatives to Shelters-Domestic Violence Prevention Program.  As an outside consultant, she facilitated trainings in Diversity and Conflict Resolution at Con Edison,  and the County of Nassau.

Along with her mediation practice, Ms. Berlin provides organizations with needs assessment and custom design of early dispute resolution systems.  She designs and implements seminars and workshops relating to organizational development skills and these trainings include coaching and group workshops in Behavior Styles, Anger Management, Conflict Resolution, Coping and Stress Management, Team Building, Motivation, Cultural Competency, Time and Project Management, and Communication Skills. Her client list includes KingAlarm, Covenant House, The United Nations, Office of Workers’ Compensation, Hofstra University, Baruch College, Villages of Scarsdale and Mamaroneck and Yonkers, Queensborough College, Protech Security, Alarmguard, Mayflower Hotel, The Avalon Hotel, Winthrop University Hospital, Lutheran Medical Center, Northern Westchester Hospital, St. Mary’s Hospital, Brookdale Medical Center, Association of Collaborative Lawyers of Rockland/Westchester, Lancer Insurance, Town of Brookhaven and Self Defenses Inc.

Ms. Berlin holds a Masters Degree from Columbia University in Organizational Psychology with a major in Mediation and Conflict Resolution.  She is President of RHB Conflict Resolution Services and Helix Consulting LLC.  She is also a founding Director of Mediate Solutions, a mediation, consulting and training firm in New York.  Ms. Berlin’s training credentials include The Bar Association of the City of NY, The International Center for Cooperation and Conflict Resolution (ICCCR)-Columbia University, Harvard/M.I.T. Program on Negotiation, USPS Redress Mediation Program, EEOC Mediation Program, and The Center for Family and Divorce Mediation.  She is a member of the Association for Conflict Resolution.

Successful Communicators

  • Understand themselves and how their behavior affects others
  • Have a positive attitude about themselves which causes others to have confidence in themselves
  • Understand their reactions to other people
  • Know how to adapt their behavior to meet the needs of other people and particular situations
  • Stay authentic
  • Recognize the value of conflict and understand how to manage it
  • Think and act proactively, not reactively

Perceptional =

Recognition

+

Interpretation

+

Expectations

=

BEHAVIOR

Developing Effective Communication Skills

The basis of any relationship is communication.  The importance of effective communications skills is crucial and its value in the workplace is incalculable.  In organizational life, everything is about communication, and although it can be a challenge, no matter where in the hierarchy one is, taking the initiative for one’s personal communications skills should be a priority.

The following skills will enable you to communicate effectively and productively so that you can be assured that all exchanges have the greatest chance for positive outcomes.  Skills to explore:

  • Self-disclosure:  clearly telling the other person what you think, feel and want
  • Establish trust:  respect confidences, speak honestly, show respect
  • Assertiveness:  standing up for your opinions, ideas, beliefs and needs while respecting those of others
  • Dynamic/active listening:  Listening to what the other person is really saying
  • Criticism:  constructively sharing your ideas and feelings about another person’s ideas and actions
  • Team communication:  communicating is a group situation

THE BEST WAY TO START IMPROVING COMMUNICATIONS EFFECTIVENESS AT WORK IS TO MAKE IT A PRIORITY TO DO SO.

Communication and Skills Development

DISC is a valuable tool that provides a common way of communicating throughout an organization. Understanding the dimensions of DISC empowers you to be more aware, and to better understand the strengths and challenges of yourself, co-workers, employees or customers.  It helps you to expand your thinking and to more effectively adapt your behavior style in a variety of workplace situations and environments.

The objective of the dimensions of DISC is to:

  • Assist you in learning how to match one’s communication pace and content to that of the other person
  • To help people learn to listen effectively
  • To provide a tool for understanding different common preferences and needs
  • To build an awareness of individual differences in communication
  • To access effective ways to communicate with individuals in an organization

D- DOMINANCE

Strengths may include that you:

  • can make a decision when no one else wants to
  • are not afraid to confront tough issues/situations
  • accept change as a personal challenge
  • keep the team focused and on task

Those you work with may see the following limitations:

  • may come across as unapproachable
  • insensitive to others
  • impatient with others
  • try to get the team moving before it is ready

You can be a more effective employer or co-worker by:

  • developing more patience
  • toning down your directness – asking more  questions
  • working on your approachability – watch body language and offer more encouragement in conversation

DOMINANCE NEEDS RESULTS

I- INFLUENCE

Strengths may include that you:

  • are always available for others – give your time easily
  • are good at inspiring others
  • spread your enthusiasm and positive attitude to others
  • easily give positive feedback to those you work with

Those you work with may see the following limitations:

  • disorganized
  • superficial in your approach
  • lack of follow through
  • appear to not be focused on tasks

You can be a more effective employer or co-worker by:

  • listening more carefully
  • becoming more organized
  • providing more detail
  • demonstrate focus on tasks

INFLUENCE NEEDS ACCEPTANCE AND INTERACTION

S- STEADINESS

Strengths may include that you are:

  • a good team player
  • empathetic and sensitive to the needs of others
  • methodical and good at developing systems
  • good at listening

Those you work with may see the following limitations:

  • indecisive
  • indirect
  • resistant to change

You can be a more effective employer or co-worker by:

  • becoming more assertive and direct with others
  • coping better with change
  • not carrying the burden of everyone else’s problems

STEADINESS NEEDS ASSURANCE

C- CONSCIENTIOUSNESS

Strengths may include that you are:

  • thorough
  • certain to follow standards accurately
  • conscientious
  • diplomatic
  • accurate

Those you work with may see the following limitations:

  • overly concerned with perfection
  • aloof
  • hampering creativity in others with your desire to stick to the rules
  • non-demonstrative

You can be a more effective employer or co-worker by:

  • better accepting differences
  • being more open and communicating more
  • letting others know what you feel

CONSCIENTIOUSNESS NEEDS DETAILS

Listening Vs. Hearing

Hearing is the special sense by which noises and tones are received as stimuli.  Hearing is a sensory experience that gathers sound waves indiscriminately.

Listening includes more than just sound being received by the ear and transmitted to the brain.  Listening includes interpreting or processing that sound.

Active Listening is the most useful of all listening skills.  In active listening we are genuinely interested in understanding what the other person is thinking, feeling, wanting or what the message means, and we are active in checking out our understanding before we respond with our new message.  We restate or paraphrase our understanding of their message and reflect it back to the sender for verification.

We can hear something without choosing to listen. Some speech communication specialists have found that when you are listening, your heart speeds up, your blood circulates faster and your temperature rises.

Up to 85% of listening is non-verbal communication.  It’s comprised of many components including gestures, body language, inflexion, tone and pitch of voice, accents, and attitudes.  Significant communication can take place without a word being spoken.

IT TAKES ENERGY TO LISTEN AND LISTENING IS AN ACTIVE AND VOLUNTARY ACTION.  BECOMING A GOOD LISTENER STARTS WITH TURNING A PASSIVE PROCESS (HEARING) INTO AN ACTIVE ONE (LISTENING).

Components of Collaborative Strategy in Conflict Resolution

If you pursue a collaborative strategy in your communications, it will have some or all of these characteristics:

  • You consider current and future relationship between the parties as important
  • Power imbalance is unimportant because you are looking for “buy-in” from the other, not compliance
  • Communication is open and honest
  • Maintain a trusting and friendly attitude toward the other party
  • Look for a “win-win” solution
  • Emphasize shared values and beliefs
  • Accept legitimacy of the other party to negotiate with you
  • Give the other party the benefit of the doubt regarding

misjudgments and assume they are committed to working with good will

  • You will demonstrate a concern for the other party as well as yourself and search for common ground and mutually acceptable solutions

Model for Resolving Conflict

6 Steps to Begin Dialogue Around Issues of Conflict

  1. Ask the person if you can talk to them.  If the timing is not right, try

to agree on a time to talk in private.

  1. Say something positive.  This can be:

An affirmation of that person.

A validation of their position.

A reference to your past relationship.

  1. Tell the person what is on your mind.

Refer to behavior.

Acknowledge how it makes you feel.

Ask, “How do ‘I’ contribute to this situation?”

Ask, “Is there anything ‘I’ can do differently?”

  1. Listen to the other point of view.
  1. Ask for the behavioral change you are seeking.
  1. Thank the person for their time.

ALWAYS REMEMBER TO USE ‘I’ AND ‘WE’ MESSAGES.

Personal Action Plan

Identify four things that you learned today that you will implement immediately to make your workplace communications more powerful.

  1. INCREASE COMMUNICATION OPPORTUNITIES

What am I going to do and how will I do it?

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  1. IMPROVE INTERPERSONAL SKILLS

What am I going to do and how will I do it?

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

  1. DEVELOP POSTIVE INTERACTIONS

What am I going to do and how will I do it?

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

  1. ANTICIPATE MISUNDERSTANDINGS

What am I going to do and how will I do it?

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

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