By Chelsea A.
Students often come to the Writing Center to restructure their papers. They have the sense that the “flow” is somehow off, but are uncertain about how to revise to improve it. Could the paper use a transitional phrase to improve the flow between sentences, or a topic sentence to signpost the flow of the argument, or does it require a complete structural overhaul?
Restructuring a paper can mean many things, but oftentimes it means moving key sentences or ideas that are out of place. Sometimes the thesis statement is in the conclusion when it should be at the end of the first paragraph, or a quote of textual evidence appears in the introduction, when it would be better placed in a body paragraph where it can be analyzed.
In this event, one way to restructure is by literally copying the paper (with a copy machine), cutting out sentences and phrases that are out of place (with scissors), and pasting or taping them back into the piece of writing at the appropriate place. This process emphasizes that just moving a word, phrase, sentence, or unit of thought can improve a paper, and it shows that the student has already done the work of drafting: it’s just a matter of situating the idea in a place that best develops their argument. It’s a way to revise without actually having to rewrite!
This technique can be especially helpful when working with several drafts of the same assignment. For example, a student recently came to a session with two different introductory paragraphs. I made photocopies of both for us to analyze. One had a stronger organizational structure (this included an introduction of her topic, the historic and cultural background and overall context of the topic, an explanation of the key terms she would use throughout her paper, and finally her thesis statement), while the other had better supporting details and evidence for her thesis statement.
After analyzing the strengths and weaknesses of both introductions, I asked the student to use a highlighter to highlight what she felt was working in each paragraph, and to explain why she made these choices. After discussing her decisions about what to keep and what to omit, I asked her to use the scissors to cut out the sentences that were not working. We discussed why these weren’t working, which in this case was either because the placement of the idea disrupted the flow of the paragraph, or because of redundancy.
I then handed the student scissors and tape, and placed two of the original photocopies at the head of the table—a spatial-visual reminder of where she started—and asked her to rearrange the sentences that she had cut out to keep for the final draft. During this process, I encouraged the student to move the sentences around on the table—to see how the “flow” of the paragraph was strengthened or weakened simply by the different placement of sentences in the order of the paragraph—and gradually, like puzzle pieces, the essay began to shift into place.
By using this technique, the student assumes the role of the director of their work. They take charge of the sentences they’ve created and reassemble them, experimenting with sentence placement in a way that allows them to move each idea freely until it falls into place. The process of revising becomes a creative act of rebuilding and restructuring the paper until it flows logically and clearly, offering the best presentation of the student’s ideas. Much like the altered text of blackout poetry, the collage aesthetic of zines, and the text-based paintings and sculptures of artists like Bruce Nauman, Glenn Ligon, and Jenny Holzer, the act of revising becomes an act of working with the materiality of the paper to create a new version of an older text. Simply by rustling around the pieces of the paper, the flow is improved.
Published on April 12, 2018
