Category: MA1 Draft 1

Topic: 

My topic will be how remote learning will affect students. I choose this topic because it is related to my personal life. As a freshman in college, my life had changed significantly since the first day that I was in college. I have no clue whether those changes were caused by remote learning or the transition to college. The purpose of this research is to find out the answer.

Research questions:

1. How does remote learning affect students’ mental health state?
2. How does remote learning affect students’ studying efficiency?
3. How does remote learning or quarantine affect students’ physical health state?

Source 1

Aguilera-Hermida, A. (2020, September 09). College students’ use and acceptance of emergency online learning due To covid-19. Retrieved March 14, 2021, from https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S266637402030011X

Summary:

Due to COVID-19, higher education institutions, such as colleges and universities,  transitioned from class on campus to online class on Zoom. This academic journal explored college students’ perceptions of their adoption, use, and acceptance of emergency online learning. The factors analyzed in this study were their attitude, affect, and motivation; perceived behavioral control (ease of use of technology, self-efficacy, and accessibility), and cognitive engagement. The researcher had conducted surveys on 270 students, [Were all of the students the same age or in the same stage of their college career?] Quantitative and qualitative data were collected from them. The result of the surveys present how attitude, motivation, self-efficacy, and use of technology play a significant role in the cognitive engagement and academic performance of students. The findings showed that motivation, self-efficacy, and cognitive engagement decreased after the transition, and only the use of technology increased. Also, participants preferred face-to-face learning over online learning. At the end of this academic article, the author presents suggestions on how to improve the acceptance of emergency online learning.

Reflection:

This academic journal is a very effective source, it starts from real experiments that were conducted on students, instead of writing everything theoretically. This article mentioned both positive and negative impacts of remote learning on students, and it talked about it in many  different ways which were students’ attitude, affect, motivation, perceived behavioral control, and cognitive engagement. [Did anything stand out to you in particular?] The authors also provide charts with statistics to support their previous statement, which make their statement much more reliable; those statistics and charts can be a strong evidence to use in my paper. Also, after analysing all of the aspects that were stated previously, the author provides the suggestions that might fix the problems that students faced caused by remote learning, it is another resource that I can use for the counter arguments to emphasize my claim. [Did any of these suggestions stand out to you for your own essay?]

Quote:

“Self-efficacy is a strong determinant of a successful online educational experience (Albelbisi & Yusop, 2019). Consequently, I analyzed what factors impacted self-efficacy. I compared previous use and knowledge of technology with self-efficacy because if students have used technology, it is easier to use it again (Kemp et al., 2019). Responses showed a statistically significant weak positive relation between the use of technology before COVID-19 and self-efficacy, r(236) = 0.153, p < .05. Students who used technology before online learning due to COVID-19 had a better perception of their capacity for academic success.” [I would suggest paraphrasing this. We generally don’t use direct quotes unless the exact words are important for the meaning]

Reasons to choose this quote:

This quote states how important self-efficacy is in a successful online educational experience. Also, it highlights how remote learning would impact students’ ability of self-efficacy by distraction. The most important of all, this quote contains statistics, which is the most powerful evidence that can convince the audiences.

Source 2

Aguilera-Hermida, A. P. (2020, September 9). College students’ use and acceptance of emergency online learning due To covid-19. https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S266637402030011X. [This is the same link as your first article. Make sure you update this.]

Summary:

Coronavirus, a deadly virus caused an unimaginable pandemic across the globe and in order to limit its spread the lockdown and quarantine initiative was introduced. The mental health of students generally refers to the complete mental well-being and the absence of any mental disorders. This pandemic caused a major fluctuation in mental attitudes and anxiety levels of students. The main aim of this study was to analyze the attitude of students in relation to the quarantine and the mental health of students during the lockdown period. A self administered questionnaire was prepared and circulated. The results were obtained and statistically analysed using SPSS software with a version of 22 and the statistical test used was descriptive statistics. [What does SPSS mean? Also, what are descriptive statistics? You might need to include small details here so your readers understand] It was found that the majority of students had no change in relationship between friends and family and were able to counteract boredom and laugh every single day of the quarantine. The study concluded that the quarantine period had an effect on attitude and anger levels of students. [This seems to contradict your previous sentence] Teenagers were physically and psychologically affected by the quarantine due to lack of socialization and however proved to be addicted to social media which had a deteriorating rating impact on the quality of life.

Reflection:

This academic journal is an effective resource that analyzes how teenagers were affected on their mental health by the quarantine. This journal provides positive effects that quarantine had brought to teenagers; they are more close to their family, unlike the days that they were in school regularly. On the other hand, it also provides the negative impacts that quarantine had brought to teennagers; they are more stressful and increase their anxiety. The journal provides various charts and data that supports its previous argument, which I can use as reliable evidence. [Good. Just make sure you can explain what the data/charts show the readers] Lastly, the finding shows that teenagers were  psychologically affected by the quarantine due to lack of socialization and however proved to be addicted to social media which had a deteriorating rating impact on the quality of life. More awareness may be provided for the younger generation to make themselves physically active to have a balanced diet in this quarantine period.

Quote:

“17.82% of students voted for the scale ranging from 8-10 for being anxious to end the quarantine, 32.67% for 4-7 and 49.5% for 1-3. (Figure.7). 14.98% had an unaffected relationship with friends, 39.60% became more distant and 40.59% for bringing them closer. (Figure.8)” [Again, I would paraphrase this]

Reasons that I choose this quote:

This quote emphasizes how teenagers were mentally impacted by quarantine by providing numbers that show the level of teenagers’ anxiety. This is a very powerful evidence that proves quarantine does bring anxiety to teenagers.

Both of these sources relate to your topic. One of the challenges is going to be constructing your argument for the essay. Are you going to try to convince your readers that the long term impact of remote learning won’t be too bad? Or, are you going to take the opposite stance? It’s your call.

Topic: I will be researching how the depiction of the “ideal” body on social media led people to develop eating disorders and how eating disorders affect a person’s not only physical but also mental state.

Research Questions: 

1. How have various social influencers perpetuated unrealistic body standards?
2. Do eating disorders arise from body dysmorphia?
3. What leads a person to develop eating disorders?
4. Is eating disorder a mental or physical illness?

[I think questions 3 & 4 are a little to big. Also, they have concrete answers that we can easily find with a Google search. Rather than using them to guide your topic, maybe think about using these questions to help you present some background information in your introduction section of the essay]

Reference Entry #1

Jessica F. Saunders, MS,1,* and Asia A. Eaton, PhD1 , (2018). Snaps, Selfies, and Shares: How Three Popular Social Media Platforms Contribute to the Sociocultural Model of Disordered Eating Among Young Women. Libertpub.com. https://www.liebertpub.com/doi/pdf/10.1089/cyber.2017.0713

Interesting Quotes and Paraphrases of Key Points

According to Sanders and Eaton(2018), “Cultivation theory posits that increased media exposure causes people to believe that the ideals portrayed in media exist in the real world,26 and gratifications and uses theory describes the needs that drive individuals to seek out mass media.27 Based on these theories, exposure to the thin ideal and other harmful norms around appearance through SNS will convince individuals that these are appropriate realworld standards, leading to objectified body consciousness and social comparisons” (p. 344).

Reason for Selecting this Quote: This quote explained the correlation between social media and eating disorders. [I suggest paraphrasing this. We generally don’t quote large passages when we can use our own words instead]

I want to paraphrase the following paragraph because it will help readers understand how social media is linked to eating disorders.

Along with social comparisons, the expanded sociocultural model of disordered eating identifies body surveillance, or the tendency to over-focus on appearance attributes,as a social–cognitive factor linking sociocultural pressures to disordered eating. By adopting an observer perspective and internalizing messages regarding the malleability of one’s body, self-objectification primarily manifests behaviorally through body surveillance. Women who are concentrated on their appearance are also more observant of how they compare with other women; thus, body surveillance tendencies predict disordered eating tendencies, and this relationship is linked by appearance-related comparisons. 

Paraphrase of this Quote: Overly observing or focusing on certain body parts have been found to have a connection with the development of eating disorders as it leads women to compare themselves to the “ideal” body types, leading them to take certain actions to achieve their desired body type.

Summary of Main Ideas

According to Saunders and Eaton, Social Networking Systems such as Instagram, Snapchat, and Facebook have an association to the development of eating disorders (e.g.. anorexia nervosa, bulimia nervosa, binge eating disorder, etc.) among adolescent women. They conducted a research where participants were asked 4 question free response questions about their relationship with SNS to examine its effect and possible correlation to eating disorders. The results supported the research’s claim of the correlation of how representation and glorification of the “ideal” body type can lead individuals to compare their body to the ones they see online. [Nice job with this summary!]

Response/Analysis

I agree with the claims of this research as it holds statistical evidence. [Remember, in analysis writing we avoid agree/disagree statements so that we can stay objective] Moreover, comparing your body to what you see on the internet can have an offsetting effect on your mental health. What you see on the internet has been taking from a certain angle and lighting along with possible photoshopping to make it seem that way. The depiction of the body on the internet is unrealistic itself from the beginning/ And, seeing such “perfect” bodies can lead individuals to resort to becoming insecure and having lower self esteem about their body. This leads them to developing unhealthy eating habits such as restricting or overeating to achieve the “ideal” body. While, some develop such eating habits to cope with the emotions they experience from having a lower self esteem. However, it is important to mention that eating disorders cannot be tied down just there reasons, people develop them for many other reasons. [Very strong analysis! Great work!]

Reference Entry #2

Weir, K. (2016, April). New insights on eating disorders. Monitor on Psychology, 47(4). http://www.apa.org/monitor/2016/04/eating-disorders

Interesting Quotes and Paraphrases of Key Points

Quote: “Even medical definitions of eating disorders have often focused on external factors, including cultural pressures, parents’ attitudes toward weight and diet, and stressful or traumatic events that might trigger disordered eating habits.”

Reason for Selecting this Quote: I chose this quote because it helps diminish people’s general perception of eating disorders and give readers an opportunity to think more about the other various reasons that one might develop an eating disorder

I want to paraphrase the following paragraph because it will help readers understand how people with anorexia respond to people with bulimia.

“An important piece of the altered reward system seems to be dopamine, the neurotransmitter that motivates us to cut a second helping of that chocolate cake. Dopamine activity is altered in both bulimia and anorexia — but in opposite ways, according to research by Guido Frank, MD, a professor of psychiatry at the University of Colorado Anschutz Medical Campus.”

Paraphrase: According to the research by research by Guido Frank, MD, a professor of psychiatry at the University of Colorado Anschutz Medical Campus, an individual with bulimia responds differently to eating a certain food psychology as opposed to someone with bulimia. For instance, anorexic individuals tend to produce more dopamine during eating than individuals with bulimia, leading anorexic people to have control over what they are eating while people with bulimia tend to be more numb throughout their whole experience.

Summary of Main Ideas

This article gives an overall description of bulimia and anorexia. The author also explains how the psychological thought process when eating differs for a person with normal eating habits compared to one with eating disorders, debunking the misconception of how eating disorders only arise from the society and environment. Moreover, the author also talks about the negative effects these eating disorders can have on a person’s both physical and mental health. For instance, people with anorexia are sometimes at risk of dying from overly restricting their food intake. [This seems like it might be a good source for giving general background information.]

Response/Analysis

This article gives a basic overall description of the two main eating disorders I will be focusing on. I will use this article to connect how comparing your body to the “ideal” body types can take a mental toll on a person. Moreover, I can use quotes from this website to explain how a person changes their psychological thinking about food, leading them to develop an unhealthy relationship with eating in general. [Great! This will be a good ouse of this source.]

Topic: How has Covid-19 impacted the world of soccer.

The reason I chose this topic is because I am a soccer fan and I would like to talk about how Covid-19 has changed this sport for more than a year now.

Primary Research Questions:

1.How are the main institutions of soccer dealing with the current situation of the pandemic?
2.Will there be additional restrictions or will the actual ones change?
3.What is going to happen with the development of teams?

Remember, good research questions should not have clear and obvious answers. Check your first two questions again. We can easily answer these questions with a few simple Google searches. Your third question is a little more open, since it is asking about future practices. I suggest trying to focus your efforts on this question or a similar one that explores the impact that COVID has had on the more unpredictable elements of soccer in general. For example, are the risks associated with playing more compact schedules too high Will this eventually lead to less competitive matches, especially for smaller market clubs? 

Entry 1

Reference Entry:

Mota, Santos, & Marocolo. (2020). Change in Soccer Substitutions Rule Due To Covid-19: Why only Five Substitutions? Retrieved March 12, 2021, from https://cuny-bb.primo.exlibrisgroup.com/discovery/fulldisplay?docid=cdi_doaj_primary_oai_doaj_org_article_145ea01988f549659ea54f3e178f00b7&context=PC&vid=01CUNY_BB%3ACUNY_BB&lang=en&adaptor=Primo+Central&tab=Everything&query=any%2Ccontains%2Ccovid-19+soccer&offset=0

Summary:

The sport with the highest number of injured players is said to be soccer. Statistically, players have a higher chance of getting injured during games than during training, this due to multiple factors, such as fatigue, collisions, nature of the match, etc. Therefore, some of the rules of the game have been changed, and one of them is the substitution rule. In March of 2020 soccer seasons were interrupted worldwide to prevent the spread of coronavirus. Leagues resumed but this caused an overlay of the schedule where teams had to play several games in a couple of days, which logically increases the risk of injuries. Hence, FIFA (International Federation of Soccer) temporarily authorized the increment of up to five substitutions for each team per game as compared to the standard rule of only 3 substitutions for each team. Soccer is a physically demanding sport, therefore this rule was amended to help decrease the injury rate of the players during a game.

Reflection:

I believe that the rule of allowing teams to make 5 substitutions in a game is much needed for players and teams as well. [We want to try to stay away from agree/disagree or “I believe” statements for this research/essay. Instead, we want to focus on simply providing an analysis of the work we are reading.] The reason I think so is because playing 3 or 4 games per week is very risky for soccer players because they are being exposed to the probability of getting injured and this may affect their season or even their career. When a player gets injured, he loses his form and will need time to go back to his old form, thus his spot in the starting line-up is questioned. This scenario usually happens with long-term injuries, but it may happen even with short-term ones. The reason this rule is beneficial to teams is because they can’t afford to lose their players, especially important ones, due to injuries. If this happens, then their chances of competing for a cup or league get smaller and smaller. That is why I think FIFA made the right decision when they added the 5 substitutions rule.

Quote:

“Modern soccer has several matches with 72–96 h between matches, generating congested schedules; an issue for clubs and medical staff (Ekstrand et al., 2004; Dellal et al., 2015). Now, with seasons resuming, this issue is exacerbated as most soccer clubs are involved in upwards of two matches each week.” (page 1).

Reason for choosing to paraphrase this quote: This sentence clearly shows how soccer players might become injury prone due to the excessive fatigue caused by overloaded schedule. As mentioned above, playing a couple of games in a week may affect players’ performances.

Paraphrase of this quote: There is a time period of 3-4 days between games in modern soccer which is considered to cause a very tiresome schedule for teams. This problem is not addressed to clubs only, but also to the medical staff of the teams. With the continuation of the season, this issue has become worse and worse since soccer clubs will consequently participate in more than two games per week.

Entry 2

Reference Entry:

Cole. (2020). How is COVID-19 affecting the Football (Soccer) Industry? Retrieved March 13, 2021, from https://www.masterstudies.com/article/how-is-covid-19-affecting-the-football-industry/

Summary:

Fans who have watched a game of soccer from the standings of the stadium are now watching them from their home. There are lots of challenges that the sport is facing, and here are some of them; changed routines, matchday innovation, youth players thrive, developing technology and relationships, financial hit not as bad as predicted etc. People not attending the stadiums means no income for clubs from sold tickets, which leads to inability from signing big name players who cost millions of money. This results in the thriving of academy players, who can make it to the first team and will cost no money. However, the financial loss is not as bad as predicted where leagues were said to lose billions of money. Soccer businesses are also evolving with institutions opening up to offer degrees for those deeply interested in the sport. [I think this source might be good as an introduction/background information about how COVID has affected soccer in general.]

Reflection:

I am with the same mind that soccer has irreversibly changed, hopefully not for too long. Even though the article suggests that the financial hit is not that huge, some big clubs are in debt of billions of euros. This has happened mainly due to the lack of generating income that fans and stadiums bring. Also, I agree that players of youth teams are getting more chances in the first teams, and this again due to the small capacity of income. Transfers are hardly being made since the value of the players is too high for some teams, therefore they look up to their academies to find the players they need. Overall, the article does well in explaining the drastic changes that are occurring in soccer which otherwise, I believe, would not occur if it wasn’t for the pandemic. The safety of people ( players included) is of course what matters, but as a soccer fan I would like to see the stadiums packed with fans again. [Similar to my comment on the previous reflection: you have some good information here but stay away from offering your opinion; and instead, try to give more analysis about what this means.]

Quote:

“Instead of investing tens of millions in headline-grabbing signings, managers and coaches will invest unprecedented time and care in their youth squads, therefore promoting local talent.” (page 1)

Reason for choosing to paraphrase this quote: I strongly believe that one positive effect of the pandemic in soccer is the decrease of players’ market price. During the past decade, the price of decent players has gone so up ( for example $80 million) that in my opinion it is inconceivable to think that he is worth that much. I am not quite sure if it has to do with the currency or with business, but some players don’t justify their worth with what they show on the pitch.

Paraphrase of the quote:

Coaches are looking to improve their teams by using the local talent that they have at their disposal, with many academy players trying their hardest to make it to the first team. This, however, is an unusual event since coaches prefer to spend millions of money on signing players from other teams.

You’re off to a good start with this topic. We just need to focus on narrowing your focus so that you are researching/writing about a topic that is smaller and more argument-focused. 

Topic: I’m researching the impact the Covid-19 Pandemic had on increased cases of depression in ethnic minorities living in the united states. [Great! This is a very focused topic with a clear audience in mind]

Why I picked this topic: I chose this topic since its a big issue we are currently living through. The pandemic has impacted millions of working class people, of those people many are minorities. I would like to research exactly how these minorities are being impacted mentally.

Research Question: How has the pandemic impacted cases of depression in ethnic minorities in the united states?

• How does a person become depressed? What environment do they have to be in? [This might be a little too big because there are so many contributing factors. But, you might be able to pin-point a few that directly relate to the group of people you are writing about/for]
• How does ethnicity affect mental health?
• Relations between minorities and their social class.
• How did the pandemic affect the working class?

Reference Entry #1

Berman, R. (2020, September 19). US cases of depression have tripled during the COVID-19 pandemic. Retrieved March 12, 2021, from https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/us-cases-of-depression-have-tripled-during-the-covid-19-pandemic

Interesting Quotes and Paraphrases of Key Points

• According to R. Berman (2020), “…individuals with less than $5,000 in savings were 50% more likely to be experiencing symptoms of depression than those who had more.”

Reason for Selecting this Quote: The quote helps emphasize the idea that those with lower incomes and fewer economic resources, most notably seen in minorities, have been affected by the pandemic.

I want to paraphrase the following paragraph because it highlights how economic and social status play a role in the impact of a persons mental health.

The CLIMB survey also questioned participants regarding the various stressors associated with the pandemic. These stressors included the death of a friend or loved one and financial worries, such as the loss, or potential loss, of personal income. The survey found that symptoms of depression had risen in response to the pandemic across all demographic groups. According to the survey participants, the predominant driver of depression was concern regarding personal financial well-being. Lead study author Catherine Ettman says, “Persons who were already at risk before COVID-19, with fewer social and economic resources, were more likely to report probable depression.”

Paraphrase of this Quote: In the CLIMB survey questions related to possible causes of stress during the pandemic where asked. The most notable group that had seen an increase in depression were those with financial issues. According to Catherine Ettman, those with fewer economic resources had a higher probability of reporting depression.

Summary of Main Ideas

The article written by Berman focuses on the cases of depression increasing in the United States after the pandemic. More importantly, it talks about those struggling with their finances and how that becomes a huge struggle that could possibly lead to a toll on a persons mental health. They use information from a survey that shows a difference of 8.5% of adults reporting depression, while after covid the number of reports increased to 27.8% Not having savings was also addressed in the article and the author stated that those with low amounts of saving ($5,000) would be very likely to experience depression or symptoms associated with depression.

Response/Analysis

This article highlights how financial issues play a huge role in mental health. While this article doesn’t entirely focus on ethnic minorities, it can still be tied with minority groups. Most minorities struggle with finances and are part of the working class. [If you could find some data to support this claim, you’d be able to connect it to the information in this article]  Knowing that their were many jobs lost during the pandemic, you can see how many people became stressed. Leading to the possibility of depression. This will be tied into research of ethnic minorities and their social class, along with what financial issues they face that could lead them to stress.

Reference Entry #2

Rura, N. (2020, September 30). Poll: 61% of U.S. households with children report facing serious financial problems during the coronavirus outbreak. Retrieved March 12, 2021, from https://www.hsph.harvard.edu/news/press-releases/poll-61-of-u-s-households-with-children-report-facing-serious-financial-problems-during-the-coronavirus-outbreak/

Interesting Quotes and Paraphrases of Key Points

• “…59% of households with children in the U.S. report experiencing serious problems during this time…  among working households, nearly one in five (18%) reporting serious problems getting childcare when adults need to work.”

Reason for Selecting this Quote: Based on the survey conducted it brings to light the issue of how low income families rely on assistance during these times in order to earn money for them to live off of.

I want to paraphrase the following paragraph because it focuses on exactly how minorities have been financially affected by the pandemic.

Boston, MA – According to a new NPR/Robert Wood Johnson Foundation/Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health poll, 61% of U.S. households with children report facing serious financial problems during the coronavirus outbreak. Serious problems are reported across a wide range of areas during this time, including depleting household savings, serious problems paying credit card bills and other debt, and affording medical care (see Table 1). Many of these problems are concentrated among Black and Latino households with children, households with children that have annual incomes below $100,000, and households with children that have experienced job or wage losses since the start of the outbreak. Serious financial problems are reported by large majorities of Latino (86%) and Black (66%) households with children, as well as about half (51%) of white households with children. In addition, about three in four (74%) households with children that have annual incomes below $100,000 report facing serious financial problems during the coronavirus outbreak.

Paraphrase of this Quote: The Harvard T.H. Chan School of Public Health poll found that around 61% of U.S. households with children faced financial issues during the pandemic. These include financial savings diminishing, debts, and medical care issues. Most of these issues come from minority households. 86% of Latino and 66% of Black households stated they had major financial issues.

Summary of Main Ideas

In this survey we take a look at exactly how how serious the pandemic hit minority homes, specifically those of the working class. The survey found that a large percentage of minority households with children faced financial issues and struggled with a balance between taking care of their children and keeping them educated through online remote learning. [This looks like a solid source for your project, but the summary you’ve written is a little thin. Could you provide more details about the researcher’s methods in this work?]

Response/Analysis

Ethnic minorities were highlighted in the survey which helps me use for my topic. Similar to to the first entry it talks about how financial struggles in minority households cause a lot of problems. This survey targets issues found for those with children. As a working class adult during the pandemic, you have to struggle with figuring out how you’ll get enough money for food, rent, bills etc. Having to worry about a child getting the proper education or taking care of them is another problem that piles up and leads to stress and worry.

You are off to a really good start so far. You have a solid topic and these two sources will definitely help you construct an argument for the essay.

 

Topic: Our group is researching on screen time as technology has quickly become one of our daily necessities. Definitely, screen time has many pros and cons but we decided to focus more on the positive effects.

Research Question: What are the positive effects technology has on schools in the U.S? [Think about how this question will set you up to make an argument in your essay. It might be that you need to expand this idea. For example, you might want to consider how schools without access to new technology are at a disadvantage and how this impacts students.]

Reference Entry #1: International, S. (n.d.). Effects of technology on classrooms and students. https://www2.ed.gov/pubs/EdReformStudies/EdTech/effectsstudents.html 

Interesting Quotes and Paraphrases of Key Points:

“Experiences in developing the kinds of rich, multimedia products that can be produced with technology, particularly when the design is done collaboratively so that students experience their peers’ reactions to their presentations, appear to support a greater awareness of audience needs and perspectives.” 

I chose this quote because it was a point that I never thought of. When I create presentations, I focus a lot on the aesthetics. For example, I would take 2 whole minutes to find a perfect font for a specific slide or I would bold a certain word to make it stand out.

“Another effect of technology cited by a great majority of teachers is an increased inclination on the part of students to work cooperatively and to provide peer tutoring. While many of the classrooms we observed assigned technology-based projects to small groups of students, as discussed above, there was also considerable tutoring going on around the use of technology itself. Collaboration is fostered for obvious reasons when students are assigned to work in pairs or small groups for work at a limited number of computers. But even when each student has a computer, teachers note an increased frequency of students helping each other.”

Paraphrase: Teachers have noticed the increasing amount of tutoring online with the use of technology. It provides a more convenient way for students to ask questions and help each other on schoolwork. [This is a good paraphrase of the passage. Nice job.]

Summary of Main Ideas:

The author highlights several positive effects of technology on school. He brings up the active role of students in classrooms. Students become more motivated as they take initiative and improve on their technical skills. With the help of technology, they are able to complete more complex tasks and are open to the internet any time, whether it’s homework help or socializing. Bringing up the topic of aesthetics in projects again from above, the author talks about how teachers are often worried students spend more time on looking for fonts or images rather than focusing on the actual assignment. The author then explains how this isn’t much of a problem as teachers can “limit the number of fonts and the font size”. [Is this a research experiment or is the author just sharing their opinions about technology in the classroom?]

Analysis: I feel like the author brings up several good benefits of technology, especially the aesthetics part and change in roles; which I never thought of. He gives a thorough explanation to each of them but there weren’t many cons that I was expecting. [Your analysis is too short and it’s missing information about how this source will connect to your research question(s).]

Reference Entry #2: How important is technology in education? Benefits, challenges, and impact on students. (2020, June 25).  https://soeonline.american.edu/blog/technology-in-education 

Interesting Quotes and Paraphrases of Key Points:

“Access is an added concern — for example, not every school district has resources to provide students with a laptop, and internet connectivity can be unreliable in homes.”

I chose this quote because lack of resources are a major setback towards making technology accessible for everyone.

“the use of technology to tailor learning plans for each student is possible. Teachers can create lessons based on student interests and strengths. An added benefit is that students can learn at their own pace. When they need to review class material to get a better understanding of essential concepts, students can review videos in the lesson plan. The data generated through these online activities enable teachers to see which students struggled with certain subjects and offer additional assistance and support.”

Paraphrase: Being able to access technology 24/7 gives students a more flexible schedule. Students are able to watch recordings to review class material and get a personalized learning opportunity.

Summary of Main Ideas:

Technology has been a really important factor in education. As Covid-19 swept the U.S, it once again proved the importance of technology for school. Virtual classrooms, recorded meetings and other digital learning tools have fostered student learning. However, there are many challenges that are involved too. “despite growing interest in the use of AR, artificial intelligence, and other emerging technology, less than 10 percent of schools report having these tools in their classrooms, according to Project Tomorrow. Additional concerns include excessive screen time, the effectiveness of teachers using the technology, and worries about technology equity.” [As a general rule, we try to avoid using direct quotes in a summary. Instead, you should use your own words to explain the main ideas and some key details] As Covid came so suddenly, schools weren’t prepared to hand out resources(laptops/hotspots, etc) or make sure students were able to handle online courses. However studies showed how students felt more confident online as information was more accessible. Students are able to collaborate more with each other as communication becomes easier. Not only can teachers answer questions during class, but also provide one-on-one feedback. The author believes it’s important for teachers to familiarize themselves with technology and take advantage of learning opportunities.

Analysis: The author has a strong argument on how educators should take advantage of technology to better support student needs. He also showed both the pros and cons of technology, which I liked. There are many statistics from studies which I can include in my essay. 

I think you are off to a good start with your sources. We’ll need to work on narrowing your focus a little bit so that you are able to write an argumentative essay later in the semester. You should also work on expanding your analysis for each entry. 

Topic: My topic is about how quarantine affects our physical health. I chose this topic because I went to the doctor one time and they told me that staying at home in a constant environment makes your body adapt to the environment making your body get used to the environment as a result your body will generally become weakened and relax. It sorta the same thing as exercising, when you exercise generally your skin might have damage and new skin is formed that is hard but if you don’t your skin is soft and easy to be damaged.

Research Question:

1.how does no exercise affect your health [Be careful about research questions like this one. There are some pretty obvious answers to this question. Remember, a good research question shouldn’t have obvious answers]

2.how does quarantine affect physical health

Source 1

Mattioli, A., Puviani, M., Nasi, M., & Farinetti, A. (2020, May 05). COVID-19 Pandemic: The effects of quarantine on cardiovascular risk. Retrieved March 12, 2021, from https://www.nature.com/articles/s41430-020-0646-z

Summary

Covid-19 being a global pandemic brought the whole world into chaos, and the government issued a quarantine to prevent any further spread of the disease and many manufacturers are in some trouble as well. As a result, the consequence of being quarantined is the lack of physical activity and an unhealthy diet. Research has shown that an adult needs to be engaged in about 75-150 minutes of exercise per week to avoid any risk of physical failure. This promotes more home-based physical activity and a healthy diet along it. Quarantine might be a safe option to avoid Covid-19, but it also brought along a different kind of danger that includes cardiovascular disease that is mainly related to unhealthy lifestyle and stress. That being said without physical activity there is also weight gain and during this time of crisis unhealthy diet is much more common cause many manufacturers are being limited in this time of need. [What is the connection between manufacturers being closed/limited and the health effects of quarantine? Are people who worked for manufacturers a higher risk?]

Reflection

The type of article is hard to find and I would say this article is qualified and does meet my needs. [If you are having a hard time finding sources about the impact of quarantine on physical health, you might want to consider narrowing your focus or looking for sources that explore similar topics and then using your analysis skills to show the connections.] Physical effect by the quarantine is not often to be seen as so very little information could be found, I would say that the article is quite reliable since it has many citations. The format of the article is very scholarly, making it a reliable article to be chosen. I would say the lack of exercise is very dangerous since I would say I am a victim of it too, quarantine really brought a lot of physical strain on me and I would say the article explains quite well the aspect that there is a lack of home-based activity to be done and I would say the diet I am having right now is the same which does not comply with the situation we are in. Not being able to go out strains our body even though we are not moving and relaxing indoors. Constantly being quarantined really needs to make us think about what is there to do to help maintain a healthy lifestyle. [It might be a good idea to research how to maintain a healthy, active lifestyle even though we are stuck inside most of the time.]

Quote

“During quarantine, we must promote physical activity at home. Little information is available on the effects of home-based physical activity on chronic disease.”

I chose this quote because this is true, with this whole pandemic going not a whole lot of people initially thought that being contained at home was a bad thing. Many disregard the lack of physical activity aspect since I was a student never had a problem with that when I was going to school. The walking process has always been my way of trying to exercise and to stay healthy but in an enclosed environment in our home, we don’t really think about it.

Source 2

Lack of physical activity. (2019, September 25). Retrieved March 12, 2021, from https://www.cdc.gov/chronicdisease/resources/publications/factsheets/physical-activity.htm

Summary

Not getting enough physical activity contributes to heart disease, type 2 diabetes, several cancers, and obesity. Also, these health problems lead to paid medical treatment that has reached 117 billion. People in any age range can benefit from more physical activity, including aerobic and muscle-strengthening exercises. Physical activity contributes to growth and development in children and reduces the risk of several chronic diseases, and helps us function better throughout the day and sleep better at night. Many people want to get regular physical activity but there is a lack of places to do these exercises for some communities. There are no places for people of all ages and disabilities to be active in. There are many programs out there that want to help us reach the amount of exercise we need to stay healthy, these include the Workplace Health Promotion Program and Whole School, Whole Community, Whole Child (WSCC) model. [Since this source is a fact sheet, it would probably give you some useful background information for your essay’s introduction section.]

Reflection

Physical activity might not be for everyone since there are cases that some do not have a place to work out or are capable of doing physical activity. I would say that as a person that doesn’t like exercise I should start someday since it will improve our daily life. Getting exercise into our life will later generally become a habit and there are programs out there that can help us achieve this goal of keeping ourselves healthy and make a habit of it. In time as this pandemic, we are in it even more important to keep up with the exercise to help stay in shape and to have a better day. As mentioned in this text that many health problems contribute to lack of exercise which many should know the risk they are taking to not do any form of physical activity to keep themself in healthy condition. [You make some good points here, but I think most people are aware of the importance of exercising. Remember, we will use our research to write an argument essay in the next unit. Make sure you are thinking about how your sources can help you make an argument about your topic. Also, take into consideration the current time and place in which you are writing (rhetorical situation). As the pandemic begins to end, how important will it be for people to think about exercising at home? Or, are you going to make the case that people’s exercise habits will change as a result of the pandemic? Do you think more people will exercise at home even after gyms reopen?]

Quote

“These lifestyle changes can cut their risk of developing type 2 diabetes by as much as 58% (71% for those over 60).”

The statistical data this quote provides for me shows how impactful being physically active is and to keep us in shape to live longer or giving us a better immune system.

Why I choose this topic: The reason why I choose this topic is that it’s a topic that everyone will have some connection to. As playing video games becomes more and more popular people should understand its effects on us. We should educate ourselves to understand the problems and the benefits that come with our decision.

Group Topic: The effects of screen time use on humans.

My Topic: The positive effects of playing video games on mental health.

Question: 

1. How have video games improved mental health for gamers?
2. How has playing video games had an impact on psychological development in children and teens? 
3. Do internet games and video games vary in the ability to improve the mental health of their players? 
4. Does the advancement in gaming change the effects gaming has on their mental health? [I’m not sure I understand what this question is asking. Maybe try to rephrase it.]

Source #1: 

Title: The benefits of playing Video Games

Granic, I., Lobel, A., & M. E. Engels, R. C. (2014). The Benefits of Playing Video Games. American Psychologist, 69(1), 66–78. https://doi-org.remote.baruch.cuny.edu/10.1037/a0034857

Summary:  

As video games become more popular in society today, there are many benefits associated with them. Playing video games has allowed benefits in four categories cognitive, motivational, emotional, and socially. The cognitive benefits of playing video games included the improvement of spatial skills, developing problem-solving skills, and increasing creativity. Gaming improves motivation by making children believe that intelligence can be obtained through hard work, and that failure is part of life and should be faced with optimism. Emotional benefits of gaming included allowing the gamer to experience positive feelings, and allow people to develop skills to help them adjust to changes around them and to negative emotions. The social benefits associated with gaming are they allow the individual to learn skills like cooperation, teamwork, leadership skills, and helping behavior. Video games have been found to be beneficial in mental health and education because video games create fun, making health treatments and learning fun.  [This is a clear and concise summary. Nice work.]

Reflection: 

This journal article gave an overview of how video games are beneficial to the mental health and psychological development of children and teens. Many of the benefits stated in the article are key skills people value in society to become successful. In this source, it does not have a lot of information about the mental health effects video games have on individuals. Since it focuses on the psychological effects it has on individuals playing games. There is a connection between psychological effects and mental health effects. Since psychological thought is the key component in understanding mental health in humans. The psychological effects allow individuals to develop skills that will affect the mental health of the person, which is one factor I needed to understand, in order, to understand the mental effects gaming has on us. [I think you could include a more specific example of this so that your readers understand exactly how the psychological effects are connected to mental health.] Also, as a project idea, we could see if we can use video games as a treatment to improve the mental health of individuals. 

Paraphrases/Quotes: “For example, in his qualitative research on children’s play conversations, Gottman (1986) showed how children use play for emotional mastery in their real lives. Whereas adolescents and adults often use self-disclosure and direct discussion with close friends to resolve emotional issues, children use play to work them out through pretend-based narratives enacted either alone or with others” (Granic et al, 2014, p 67). 

Paraphrases This Quote: Playing is important to children because it allows them to learn emotional and social skills. Adults and teens express their emotions through socialization and are more direct. [Great paraphrase!]

 Reason: The reason why I choose to paraphrase this section is because the authors brought up a very interesting point about playing. It allows for a better understanding of the topics and reasons brought up after this section. I found that playing is a key component in understanding the mental effects of gaming. Since essentially gaming is a form of playing. 

Quote: “For example, two large-scale survey studies have found that 3% of Dutch (van Rooij, Schoenmakers, Vermulst, van den Eijnden, & van de Mheen, 2011) and about 8% of U.S. youth (Gentile, 2009) who play video games exhibit pathological symptoms of addiction (i.e., damage to family, school, or psychological functioning)”(Granic et al, 2014, p.74). 

Reason: I quoted this section because it brought up the opposing end of the argument. It shows data on the negative effects of playing video games. This section can be used as statistical evidence to make my counterclaim strong.  

Source #2:

Title: Video gaming can benefit mental health, find Oxford academics

Alex Hern Technology editor. (November 16, 2020, Monday). Video gaming can benefit mental health, find Oxford academics. The Guardian (London). https://advance-lexis-com.remote.baruch.cuny.edu/api/document?collection=news&id=urn:contentItem:619H-27N1-DY4H-K1FW-00000-00&context=1516831.

Summary: 

In an Oxford study, it was found that playing video games was good for mental health. The study focuses on two games, Nintendo’s springtime craze Animal Crossing and Plant vs. Zombies: Battle of Neighborville. The Oxford study was one of the very few studies done on play-time data. The leading researcher Andrew Przybylski found that even the video game companies had very little data about their users. In his study, he found that if people play Animal Crossing, four hours a day will allow the player to be happier. [How did the researcher reach this conclusion?] Przybylski did mention that as the study continues they will find information about the negative side effects of games. Some limitations to this study included it only focused on two games that were suitable to all age groups, people’s views on gaming are different, and the intrinsic and extrinsic enjoyment. Researchers hope to bring more attention to this topic since there is not a lot of data on it, and it is a very common problem in society today. 

Reflection: 

The researchers do bring up a good point, there really was not that much research that has gone into looking into video game effects on mental health. Since video games have been so popular in the past decade and there are still effects we don’t understand. The study provides a good source of scientific data to support my claim. The study can connect with the research found in “The benefits of playing video games,” they both agree that playing video games can bring happiness to the player creating a better mental state. It’s surprising that even game companies don’t have a lot of data on their users. Since many would believe game companies have a lot of data on their users because data from their users are a really good source of information to analyze their markets, to create new games, understand what trends there are, and many more things the data is useful for. [This is interesting, especially since gaming has been around since the 1970s. I wonder if companies/researchers are getting more data now that most games are online?]

Paraphrase/ Quotes:

Quote: “The study, which focused on players of Nintendo’s springtime craze Animal Crossing, as well as EA’s shooter Plants vs. Zombies: Battle for Neighborville, found that people who played more games tended to report greater “wellbeing”, casting further doubt on reports that video gaming can harm mental health”(Hern, November 2020).

Reason: The reason why I quote this section is because it states the outcome of the study done by Oxford. It also acknowledges the other side of the argument, which makes the statement it’s making stronger. 

Quote: 

“Crucially, the study was one of the first to be done using actual play-time data. Thanks to the internet-connected nature of the games, the Oxford University team was able to link up psychological questionnaires with true records of time spent playing games. Previous studies had tended to focus on self-reported time playing, which is, the study found, only weakly correlated with reality” (Hern, November 2020).

Paraphrase: The study uses play-time data because the games used were internet connectable games. The researchers used surveys to collect the actual time the individual played the game. Studies done before were using self-reported play times, which was not close to reality (Hern, November 2020).

Reason: The reason why I paraphrase this section is because this section describes the method the researcher used in this study. Including the methods of collecting, data makes the data and conclusion of the study more reliable and believable. I would include this with the previous section to make my point stronger and supported. [Great! It would be a good idea to also mention the methods/results in your summary or analysis too.]

It looks like you have found two sources that will help you with your topic. Both of them appear to address your first research question so it might be a good idea to focus on that and forget about the other questions for now. You don’t want to risk including topics that are only loosely related. Also, in your summaries, make sure you are explaining how the researchers are getting to their results. Did they observe gamers and then ask questions? Did they play games with a group of people and then have an interview? Explaining these details will give your readers a clear understanding of where these conclusions are coming from. 

Research Topic 

• I wanted to research something about video games as it is something I am really fond about. Usually the common stereotype is that people who play video games are typically really unhealthy and I wanna look into that. Why is this happening and maybe there will be a way to fix it.

 

Research Questions

• How has video games affected the physical health of video game addiction?

 

Entry 1

Zamani, E., Chashmi, M., & Hedayati, N. (2009). Effect of addiction to computer games on physical and mental health of female and male students of guidance school in city of isfahan. Retrieved March 12, 2021, from https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3905489/

Summary

This was a study that sampled 564 students in Iran about how video games might correlate with abilities of a normal human being. They collected data based on their “physical health, anxiety and sleeplessness and impaired social functioning” using a questionnaire. They selected one random girl and boy from each school from 3 of the 5 districts within Isfahan Board of Education. The mean age of participants ended up to be 13. Through this they discovered that there was a positive correlation between student computer games and their “physical health, anxiety and sleeplessness”, while there was a negative correlation with “social functioning”. This study already enforces what is well known about the common world of gaming with the real world and tells us using statistics. Then they described how big video games were for the boys in Iran in their free time and how they do not notice their life passing. [This seems like a good source for your topic. You’ve also done a nice job summarizing the main ideas and adding some key details.]

Reflection

Even though this is a study within a different part of the world in the middle of Iran, I still think that this is useful to know. I chose this article because it showed statistics of correlations between some of the key points against playing video games. [Good reason to use this source] People who are addicted to video games usually end up being really socially awkward and physically unhealthy. I can relate to this as this has happened to me during my high school year and these statistics really show the correlation. Currently I am still struggling with sleeplessness as it is really common within people who play video games. They lose track of time and stay up longer than they think it is. The depression one is questionable but I still have seen examples of these from streamers who hate what they do streaming the same thing over and over again. [Is the depression questionable because you haven’t experienced it or because the research from your source didn’t do a good job of proving this correlation?] Like for example some numbers brought up is that the correlation is “level P ≤ 0.05” meaning the information is most accurate and making the relationship of the correlation more enforced. [Be careful presenting data out of context. What exactly does level P mean? Can you give a more detailed explanation about this data?]

Paraphrased section

“Most studies show that playing too many computer games cause physical damages and increase anxiety and depression in players. This goes to adults too, who usually have high heart beat and high blood pressure due to stress and excitement. The problem is that they forget time is passing and people forget to eat which causes a bad relationship within your body systems. There are various causes for the correlation between games and physical health. The first one is that addiction can cause disorder and increase anxiety and depression. Second is that a disorder might have caused the correlation. The third one is that they create each other, the addiction and the disorder.” [Is this the original or the paraphrase?]

I chose to paraphrase this section because it talks about where the possibility of gaming addictions come from. They also describe the effects of playing games and how it can affect a person.

Entry 2

Peter Grinspoon, M. (2020, December 22). The health effects of too much gaming. Retrieved March 12, 2021, from https://www.health.harvard.edu/blog/the-health-effects-of-too-much-gaming-2020122221645

Summary

This article tells us about the type of people playing video games and the effects. Contrary to popular beliefs, it isn’t just teens that play as only 21% of gamers are under 18. There are some good effects of gaming aside from being fun and entertaining. It can build a virtual community that helps each other and games can help people improve spatial reasoning. Not only that but it can help people with ADHD with thinking skills. But there can be side effects like inflammation of a nerve on the wrist as gamers use their wrist and arm a lot. Gaming usually also leads to obesity in both teens and adults which has multiple health conditions as people eat way more than they normally should. Another common issue is vision as you can get loads of screen time a day more than a regular person should be getting which can possibly lead to seizures. They have something called “internet gaming disorder (IGD)”, which is gaming addiction to a higher degree. This leads to a lot of social problems like education and job opportunity losses to even gaming withdrawal if they stop. They claim that gaming is associated with sleep deprivation, insomnia, anxiety, etc. They conclude by saying that “video games can be fun and a social activity when integrated into a healthy lifestyle”. [Generally, you should avoid using quotes in summary writing]

Reflection

I completely agree with this article. [Remember, we try to avoid “agree/disagree” when we are writing an analysis because our analysis should be objective] I chose this article because it had the name Harvard under it and Harvard is an extremely well known and powerful college. I found this article really interesting as it also mentions the benefits of gaming which is that it can build a community where you can help others. It also talks about negatives too and even brings up the issue of gaming addiction which is a really serious problem. There was also something called IGD which they bought up and the statistics is that 1-2% of all gamers are just addicted and this cause a lot of social problems within the person. Most of the time people who have video game addiction that are really competitive and play by themself usually end up becoming some of the most aggressive and egocentric people I meet. It also concluded with a really good message at the end saying that video games can be really useful if you integrate it within your lifestyle as it can help you be more fun and social. I agree with all of this as through my 8 years of playing games back to back and some years where I was addicted, I can relate to this article. 

Paraphrased section

Education can help to prevent injury and gamers need to know how to promote their thumbs, elbows and their body. Simply learning how to stretch eat healthier and rest better can address injuries early before they become serious. For the eyes, they can try the 20-20-20 rule where every 20 minutes, look at something 20 feet away for 20 seconds.

I to paraphrase this as this is a really good piece of information to know. Learning to exercise can really help a person and the 20-20-20 rule is just really neat to learn too.

It looks like you are off to a good start. These two sources are clearly connected to your topic. Just make sure you start to think about how you are going to turn your topic into an argument-based essay. Are you going to take the stance that gaming does more harm than good? Or are you going to attempt to persuade your audience that there is much to be gain from playing games? We want to try to avoid an essay that simply presents two sides of the argument and/or your opinions about the issue.  

Annotated Bibliography-

My Topic

The topic I choose is how COVID affects the tourism industry. I choose this topic because I think it’s important to keep this industry moving on even though it’s hard to travel now. Traveling has been one of the most relaxing things for people to do. It is one of those large industries all over the world. I think it’s a good topic to focus on since our group is inventing an app about virtual traveling. 

Research Questions

1.What actions or changes does the tourism industry do in order to keep their business going during a pandemic?

2.What impact COVID-19 brought on the tourism industry? [This question can probably be combined with the first one]

3.How traveling, these types of relaxing activities, help our mood during pandemic?

4.Why is it important to keep this industry going?

 

Reference Entry #1

World tourism organization. (n.d.). Retrieved March 11, 2021, from https://www.unwto.org/tourism-and-covid-19-unprecedented-economic-impacts

Summary

Tourism is a large industry in this globalized world. During the COVID-19 pandemic, it had challenged this industry in several aspects including the economic side and social side. Due to the pandemic, the revenue and GDP for the tourism industry had decreased. Tourism industry provided many job opportunities all over the world. As the research showed, 100 million tourism jobs are at risk now. Traveling got restricted. People who worked in this industry are now facing unemployment. Though it had negative impacts on our economy, it also brought us some positive impacts. The reduction in tourism actually helped protect our environment. The earth is becoming more healthy and green because there are less human activities involved. To maintain the movement of the economic flow, many people are trying different ways to restart tourism. One of the ideas is to move tourism into a digital format. This gave them a new choice to keep their industry moving. [This is a good source for general background information about your topic.]

Reflection

I really like this source because this article provided me different aspects on the impact COVID-19 brought on tourism. They gave us both negative and positive sides. I’m shocked by the data they provided. Before reading the article, I knew that there would be harm to the tourism industry but I never knew that much money was lost during this short period of time. It showed how strong the connection between people and traveling is. Including the workers who work in this industry. Many female and young workers are affected by the pandemic. [This is very interesting and it might be something worth looking at even deeper. Why is it that many of the workers being affected are young females?] Besides the negative effects, I never think that it could help us rebuild our environment. It’s amazing but also sarcaming that our happiness is the painfulness of our environment. To further operate the tourism industry, they had come up with several ways to restart traveling. I’m very impressed that they could find out that many alternative ways. [Which examples were most impressive for you?] It’s a great idea to balance out their advantages and disadvantages.

Paraphrase

“Tourism supports one in 10 jobs and provides livelihoods for many millions more in both developing and developed economies.” [This is another interesting piece of information because it makes me wonder how developing countries have been impacted by the loss of tourism revenue streams.]

• Many people weighed their life and money by being part of the tourism industry. 
• I choose this quote because it feels a little bit confusing and not flowy. I think they need to clarify this statement so that people won’t get too confused. To paraphrase this quote, it gave me a clearer understanding about this statement.

Reference Entry #2

Virtual travel experiences to enjoy now. (n.d.). Retrieved March 12, 2021, from https://www.boatinternational.com/destinations/virtual-travel-tours-trips-vr-experiences–43207

Summary 

Due to the coronavirus, people can not travel as they want to as usual. To rebuild their economy back, the tourism industry needs to find ways to keep their business going. Since the technology developed, there are more options than before. One of the ideas they think of is to combine traveling and technology. The invention of VR(virtual reality) technology helped them achieve their goal during times like pandemic. They added many different scenarios and experiences for people to try at home. Including having a tour in a national park, having a sightseeing tour, taking lessons for scuba diving, experiencing a fancy hotel at home, having a museum tour, and watching theatre performancing. Every fun thing people do can now all do it at home. We can still enjoy ourselves and have fun in pandemic without exposing ourselves out in public. Even though the experience is still different from the real life experience, it’s a way for us to connect ourselves to the world during this pandemic.

Reflection

Since the product for our group is going to be virtual traveling, I think this article really provides us many things we can do through mobile and or technology devices. COVID-19 brought traumatic damages on the economic system and social events. [I wonder how virtual travel experiences can bring money back to the countries where COVID impacted their tourism industries. Will these countries recover or will virtual travel hurt them even more?] Many entertainments are forbidden during this time period. Such as some of the festivals we usually held and the breaks we had during winter and spring. To stop the spread of COVID, it’s better for us to stay at home. However, it’s still important for us to keep our emotions in place so that we could still be positive. In this article, they mention combining technology with traveling experience. Though it’s not real life, the idea is fresh and cool. They bring more possibilities and options for people to have during quarantine time. In other words, we can experience fun activities at home without going out. Virtual reality really brought us into a different world where reality and our dream can be an alliance.

Paraphrase

“One way of getting tourists to travel abroad from the comfort of their own homes is through virtual reality (VR) technology and 360-degree videography. We round up the best virtual travel tours and online travel experiences that can be enjoyed online right now.”

• Virtual reality, as known as VR technology, is a 360-degree videography. During times like the pandemic where people can’t not go out and travel freely like usual, it’s a win-win that people can stay home and travel at the same time. We collected many different programs where you can enjoy various activities online right now.
• I choose this paragraph to paraphrase because this is supposed to be the major “topic sentence” for this entire article. I think they can be more attractive and clearly stated their benefits so that people would be more interested in it.

You’re off to a good start with your sources. It seems to me like you are focusing on the impact that COVID has had on tourism economies and how certain companies have tried to adapt by using virtual reality. This definitely leaves you open to form a strong argument later, when we write the essay.

Why I Choose my Topic:

Because of how accessible technology is nowadays. 86% of American households have access to the internet. I decided to research how technology affects the way people socialize online and their ability to socialize.

Researching Questions: 

Main Questions: How does the internet affect our social abilities? [I think we need to take this a little deeper. Right now, this question is pretty easy to answer without doing much research. Are you thinking more about how our interactions online might affect the way we socialize with people offline?]

Sub – Questions: 

1. How does the internet let us connect with others? [I think this question is easily answered; and therefore, shouldn’t be something you focus for this project]
2. Is it easier to make new friends through the internet? [I also think this question is too subjective. Some people will say “yes” and others will say “no”. I don’t think there is a scientific way to prove one answer over the other.]
3. Does the internet strengthen our community as a whole?
   
4. How does it vary based on heavy internet users and average users?

Article 1: Wellman, Berry, et al. Does the Internet Increase, Decrease or Supplement Social Capital. 

https://www.mysocialnetwork.net/downloads/offprint/Does%20the%20Internet%20Increase,%20Decrease,%20or%20Supplement%20Social%20Capital%202001.pdf  

Summary: The internet does serve as an alternative to both face-to-face and telephone communication enhancing relationships both online and offline. [How does it do this?] It also allows people with similar interests to communicate regardless of the distance and time. This allows a stronger community. The Internet also promotes democracy by providing an easier way to spread and voice out their beliefs. [This is true in some places but not everywhere] The internet enhances face-to-face interactions as members are more aware of the others’ needs and likes (music, picture, organizations, etc). [Do you mean it enhances face-to-face interactions among strangers? Or among friends, co-workers, family, etc?]

Paraphrase: To see the effect of the internet we need to first understand what it was like without the internet. With a spatially dispersed community the internet serves as an additional way to communicate besides face-to-face and telephone. And during the period of decline in organization participation we see the internet serve as a solution to increase involvement. [Is this the original passage or the paraphrased version?]

Analysis: This article helps answer the third question regarding how the internet strengthens the community. We see how the internet allows others to broadcast their views and form or join organizations that share the same opinion. [This analysis section is very short and does not give specific examples of how this source will help you connect your ideas and strengthen your argument.]

Article 2:Nancy K. Baym, Yan Bing Zhang, Mei-Chen Lin. Social Interaction across Media: interpersonal communication on the internet, face-to-face and the telephone. [What year was this written?]

Summary: Based on a study on college students and the three forms of communion: online interaction, face-to-face, and telephone. While it concluded that while the internet plays an important role in their social lives, face-to-face and telephone still serves as the main way of communicating. [Interesting. Are these people communicating on the phone without using the internet?]We also see internet users more likely than non-users to spend time with friends or clubs outside. There are often misconceptions that the internet affects the ability of young adults to communicate in person which is not true as on average consistent users, while enjoying online social communication, still prefer face-to-face interaction.

Paraphrase: When determining how the internet affects someone’s social ability we also need to take into account how often they spend on the internet. There are heavy users, average users, and light users. Heavy users often spend less time with their family and prefer online interactions without seeing the other person. Average users and light users prefer face-to-face interactions or telephone. 

Analysis: This article is important because while it provides evidence to my research topic it also provides counter arguments. It also splits the internet users into three categories and this is important because it does affect their preference. 

You sources seem to point towards the notion that people who interact in online communities will have an easier time socializing in face-to-face settings. Is this the direction you want to go with your essay? If so, I think it can be an interesting project. You do need to review the assignment page though. Your entries are missing important information and your analysis sections are much too vague for me to understand how these sources will help you with your research project and essay.