While doing research on what does it mean to be an “unfit mother”, I came upon an article on the New York Times, called “Losing Custody of My Hope”. I always thought this term to be quite subjective, but at the same time I believe there are some highly indisputable reasons you might think someone is “unfit”. For example, a mother who is a drug addict, or physically or sexually abuses their children would be considered in most people’s eyes as unfit.
This article is written by a woman who tells her story as a divorce woman force into a custodial battle for her 3 children by her ex-husband. According to the ex-husband, she was unfit and sued her for full custody of their children. As you read more into the case, you realize that they ex-husband’s grounds for such allegations are unfounded. Both were subjected to various exams/license procedures to try to prove who can be the better parent. I was very surprised to see that he was able to make such accusations and still tell her that he didn’t feel like she was a “bad mother per se” but feels like he can be a better “primary caregiver”. It is stated in the article that he didn’t spend enough time with his children when they were still together due to his career as a civil engineer. I’m a little taken aback because although it is not stated I feel like what evidence he had to support this claim when he went to the courts. What made him underestimate her motherhood and overestimate his job as a father? How do courts evaluate “unfit”? Part of my problem is that in a country with a myriad of cultures, can one prevent favoring one set of qualities provided by one culture, over the others.