So you’re asking how I’m doing? Wow. Everything’s just wow-worthy and so overwhelming. You know. Coming from the Philippines to ‘the’ New York. That’s got to be something, right? There’s got to be something. I just feel like I’m basically back to zero. It’s weird to think that I walked through 4 years of High School and made tons of friends and connections just for me to leave behind eventually for college. Isn’t that sad? I know it is. I guess I’m just not used to not knowing everyone around me and not have someone in an instant whenever I wanna go out. I guess it’s just really tough to start anew… alone.
Well, Baruch is cool. Except those revolving doors and elevators. Everything’s okay I guess. I just feel like being a freshman sucks bigtime. You know. I hate pretending that I know everything when I honestly know nothing. I hate acting matured when all I wanna do is sing out loud and maybe dance a little bit. I hate awkward eye-to-eye contacts with awkward people. I hate that I always forget the fact that you have to use the first floor elevator in the library to get to the 6th and up. I mean, the list goes on and on and you probably don’t wanna hear them all out. Don’t worry ’cause I know in the end, everything will be better anyway.
That’s a thing. You have to be optimistic or else one day you’ll find yourself in a dumpster crying. Yup, that’s just an exageration. I mean, everything’s just a state of mind. The more you think positive, the more positive favors you. I know it’s not easy but it’s totally worth a try. Actually, I wanna major in Optimism if such thing exists. You know I’m kidding right? Because I wanna be… I don’t know. I don’t know yet. All I know is that I wanna be someone someday somehow. That simple.
I don’t know where I’m heading at with this letter but I wanna be the person to tell you that there would be a lot of times in your life when you’d be overwhelemed. Don’t fret because that’s just how life works. That’s just how it should be. “Be yourself” for me is a very overrated advice. I think that you better know how to be not yourself especially during overwhelming times because who knows who you really are? You don’t even know who you really are, do you? Those times might push you to do things undone and step towards a different direction but have faith because those overwhelming times get you to know yourself better, if not your entire self. Life goes on as they say but don’t be afraid to stop it for a second and fail. You will, in the end, reach your dreams maybe through life-threatening revolving doors, broken escalators, packed elevators, and rude guards, but I’m sure you’ll get there. Because I know I will. Oh, I love New York. Everything’s just wow-worthy. I don’t know why they call it Big Apple though. Because for me it’s a Big Watermelon. You know I love Watermelon right?
Before I end this and be like “regards to everybody out there because I care”, I wanna share a quote from a movie I’ve seen recently. It says, “You can’t choose where you come from but you can choose where you go from there.” Goosebumps. That’s just my life. Satrapi-ish. So yes, have fun. Be overwhelmed. Think positive. Don’t be afraid to be a wallflower. And stay disorganized… like this letter. Till next time!
Back to zero,
CJ <-Here’s a picture! 🙂