Fruit salads are the weirdest thing ever. Seriously, who in their right mind thought that a fruit salad was a good idea. Now, I’m not saying that fruit is gross or anything. I love fruit, but there are just some fruit that don’t go together. Take citrus fruit, like oranges. If the orange in your salad is too bitter it will completely through off the salad. And even if the orange isn’t bitter, there’s the whole dressing thing. Some people like lemon or honey or even condensed milk on their fruit salad. Not all fruit tastes good with all that stuff on top. Everything’s just going to taste weird. Or even bananas. Bananas dry out your mouth. Who in the hell wants a dry mouth? People don’t walk around with paper towels in their mouths to keep it dry, do they? No. So why in the hell would you want to eat bananas?
Then there’s the whole thing with the name. Why would you call it a salad? A salad consists of vegetables, like lettuce, with the exception of tomatoes, of course, and even then I don’t even like tomatoes.
For something so good for you, fruit salads are pretty damn complicated.
