When you grow up as a first generation American, you have a different perspective of the world. You see people murmuring racist slurs and imitating your parents’ accent. You see the surprised face expressions when you speak fluent English. You see your parents fight and shed tears to earn money to support you. You feel useless as you try to translate things you don’t understand to your parents. You feel angry seeing the way people treat and undermine your parents. You feel sorry for not living up to their expectations and not achieving their American Dream. You feel frustration when they apologize and say, “I’m sorry for not being able to support you 100%.” That sentence always makes me feel like shit. “No, don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault.” I want to say, but those words mean nothing at that point. We just stare at the floor, desperate and wondering what lies ahead of us. What type of struggle we’re going to face next. But I have hope. I know that we can make it through, because we have each other. As long as we stick as a family, we can achieve anything, maybe one day we can even achieve the American Dream.
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