- 439: Book X, Lines 53-60
“The winds rushed out and bore them far out to sea, weeping
As their native land faded on the horizon.
When I woke up and saw what had happened
I thought long and hard about whether I should
Just go over the side and end it all in the sea
Or endure in silence and remain among the living.
In the end I decided to bear it and live.”
At this point in Odysseus’ tale, he’s semi-humorously questioning whether or not committing suicide is the best route to take given his current situation. For a long time now, Odysseus has been travelling from place to place, out at sea with a disappearing crew, and unsure of his ultimate fate. He had been fighting his hardest to get back home, warding off all of the immortal-sent obstacles that were in his way, but his efforts just didn’t seem to substantiate. “Sleep” got the best of him in the end, and caused the ship to be pushed off of its path. This passage is a perfect combination of comedic relief through hyperbolized anger and a serious look into the prospect of the life or death binary.
The passage is striking not only because of its poetic nature, but also because of its presentation of an internal existential argument, contemplation about such a grandiose subject. Odysseus, in a comedic context, considers the most polarized and seemingly concrete binary – being alive, or not being alive – and what side he should chose to align with. Paradoxically, though, it’s at this moment that the reader is given the opportunity to realize how accessible either one of those sides is, and how being alive is also being dead, because of the ability to do the latter at any time.
This is not like other binaries that are based on a scale, that have a gradual change from one end of the spectrum to another, or that allow the option of floating in the middle. It’s a fact that you are only alive, or you are only dead. The destruction of this binary, however, comes with the inevitability of each outcome; by being alive, you are destined for death. This whole scene complicates the spectrum of existing by introducing the idea of literal “sudden death” coupled with bodily autonomy. It almost suggests that the gray space in the black and white is the realization of one’s presence in the middle – the mental state of being aware of the life/death choice.
It also incorporates the role of the Fates and the humans on a larger scale. When looking at a scene like this in Greek mythology, its hard not to wonder if the Fates plan such a change in the inter-weavings, or if the human makes the spontaneous decision to snip their string then and there.