(1) In Feng Menglong’s narrative, “Du Tenth Sinks the Jewel Box in Anger”, tension between those value systems such as money and power were the cause of Du Tenth’s demise.
(2) In Feng Menglong’s narrative, “Du Tenth Sinks the Jewel Box in Anger”, Du Tenth and Li Jia’s conflicting beliefs regarding the importance that money holds in society proves that even love has a price as seen by Du Tenth’s demise.
3 responses so far ↓
v.barreras // Oct 2nd 2015 at 1:36 pm
In the first thesis, you write “those value systems.” You need to be more specific on what you are referring to when you say ‘those.’ The phrasing sounds a little weird. Maybe you could’ve said: In Feng Menglong’s narrative, “Du Tenth Sinks the Jewel Box in Anger”, the reader sees tension between value systems of money and power which caused of the demise of Du Tenth.
Just look that one over and try to rephrase it. I like the idea you have though.
The second thesis I think it is perfect. You will definitely be able to develop that into 4-5 pages and there are a lot of quotes you’ll be able to use. Overall good work.
k.vataj // Oct 2nd 2015 at 8:20 pm
I agree in the first statement that you should be more clear about the value systems. Instead of your first thesis I would’ve written, ” In FengMenlong’s narrative, “Du Tenth Sinks the Jewel Box in Anger” there are different views on money, power, and love, because of these differences in values it creates the demise of Du Tenth and Li Jia’s relationship. I like the second thesis, and it indeed shows that love in that time period and maybe even in today societal terms does come with a price tag. I think the price tag is referring to how families view social classes and marriages to be very important. Good work, I see where your thought process is headed.
JMERLE // Oct 3rd 2015 at 3:10 pm
Erika,
Of the two statements, the second is your most effective, I think, because you’ve included the beginning of an interpretation as well as an analysis (love has a price, and that you could then connect to why, in fact, the author is writing this). They would both need to be more focused, as well. In the first, what are the value systems you’d be discussing (no more than two, hopefully) and in the second, what is, exactly, the price?
Grade: 8/10