Meditation: Exhausting

I chose to do the Guided Meditation: Confidence and Breathing by Gil Fondal.

In the 24 hours before I did the meditation I was extremely stressed and frustrated because I had four papers due for different classes on the same day. However, I wouldn’t say that I was particularly worried and my anxiety level was probably a 5. There was no tension in my body and so I would rate tension as perhaps a 3. Overall, I was just really energized and working hard to finish all my assignments on time.

I felt exhausted after completing the meditation. Since I had constantly been working for the past two days, I hadn’t really stopped to consider the strain on my body that all the hard work was causing. But in the 30-odd minutes that I had to sit still and alone with my thoughts during the meditation, I became acutely aware of all the exhaustion and pain in my body. I would say that my anxiety level dropped down to a 2 but, this could have simply been because of the fact that I am done with all my assignments and am looking forward to the long weekend. The tension in my body has definitely gone up to an 8 because I performed the meditation sitting on the floor in the traditional cross-legged posture. I haven’t done this in a long time and as a result, I felt a lot of pressure in my legs and lower back.

I chose the Confidence and Breathing meditation because I was expecting to have a relaxing session to help me clear out all the tension of the past few weeks. However I became extremely tired after realizing that I hadn’t taken a substantial break or slept for more than a few hours in the past 2 days. I had no trouble focusing on my breathing and the meditation for the full time period but it wasn’t a pleasant experience because of my mental exhaustion and the physical tension in my body due to the posture. I am not sure if I would try this again since I usually am in a better frame of mind when I am working and actively thinking about things. I find it unsettling to sit still trying to empty my mind of all thoughts.