I honestly did not know what to expect of this class and what we could do within the perimeters of our subject. When reading O, Earth, to be completely transparent, I wasn’t sure if I felt comfortable with the way it was written. It turns out that I just needed to hear those words spoken by a group of talented actors to awaken the need of working on this play in me. As the only person who identifies as QPOC in the class (and a passing one on all grounds at that) and a director passionate about bending the rules and creating spaces without boundaries I thought this would be a great challenge to take on.
At first I was afraid we wouldn’t be able to cast the play true to its ethical form, true to its nature of creating a space for those who aren’t necessarily heard in the performing arts world. I theoretically knew that these people existed, somewhere out there in the universe, but how would we find them? Dana did a terrific job of setting up our backstage and making sure people are seeing and responding to our ads and before we knew it our audition rooms filled up with so many personalities of so many different backgrounds. I panicked looking at the vast amount of headshots in front of me as I had to make a choice of casting. As life goes, some of these decisions were easily and the rest extremely hard. I don’t know if I could’ve made decisions that were any better, but somehow this bunch of people were able to click well and have the conversations this play requires its team to have.
I wanted the characters of the play to be created through the actors, using their personal experiences in the real world that we could then bring into the worlds of these characters. This meant many conversations, trust exercises, and attempts to bond over snacks. By a couple of weeks into rehearsal, most actors seemed extremely comfortable in their characters and they knew what direction we would take them. This was harder with others, finding the aesthetic of Marsha and Sylvia while staying true to themselves was a challenge for both actresses. It was an effort to find the balance between what they thought was caricature, and what “camp aesthetic” was as well as who they are and who Marsha and Sylvia were. I am so extremely grateful for these actresses who took on the ridiculous challenge of acting out extremely important figures who meant a lot to them. Their final performance was so beautiful and campy yet understated that I could not be happier for the work they put into it.
I think that handling most by myself throughout a large portion of the rehearsal process, although overwhelming was a great opportunity to figure out the lengths I personally would go to, to make sure my work is translated on to a stage. Including spending weeks trying to find an actor and recasting a part after losing an actor to an injury two rehearsals before the performance. (Shoutout to Danny Marin for learning the path in two run-throughs, could not have been a full production without him). This was a challenge coming from an environment working with three other extremely talented people on putting together shows, as I had never had to carry whole rehearsals by myself. But I think this process helped me find my directorial voice, my version of performance ethics, and my vision as to what impact my art should have on the world.
One of the actors, after one of our last rehearsals told me, “I am very thankful that you cast me, I was looking for a place that would accept me as who I am and let me explore myself through my acting. And I hope that I can show someone one day that people like me can take up space on stage”. This was a queer man, who wanted to find his place in the world, and answer the question “am I gay enough for the community”, which is something I struggle with as a bisexual/queer woman. And just like my actors, I felt like I had a space to find myself, explore how my personality, and how my unique quirks can help a space become something that is different, something that touches someone, and gives them the idea that they too can be a part of this and no matter what they are enough. Because I am enough.
I don’t think I will ever forget the first time a playwright of a play said “This gave me a lot to think about, and I will rewrite a bunch. Thank you”. This was Casey, the night of May 11th. Applause and praise by audiences and peers is amazing but I don’t think anything can beat a playwright liking my work with their play in terms of fulfillment. I am grateful for the process, hardships, people, and experience.