The Parting at Ch’ang Kan has a completely different writing style compared to other translations of the poem. While all other versions boast modern day prose, this poem is written with language used in Shakespeare’s plays. With such language, the poem has a heightened romance story as the words flow seamlessly, giving the reader the ambience of the love shared between the two. By using an old language the words seem to have more weight behind them as they depict a broad picture using a minimal amount of words. Each line has the ability to stand on its own while painting a detailed picture for the reader. Compared to other translations some lines rely on previous lines as they build upon each other. This compacted poem has the ability to read more clearly and passionately compared to the other translations.
Another difference used in the translations are the grouping of words in stanzas. Each poem has a variety of stanzas, each containing different words giving the poem a different read. While reading through the poems, the translators placed certain lines in different stanzas depending on whether they felt certain sentences belong with or separated from certain paragraphs. In Two Letters From Chang Kan- 1 “At fourteen I became your wife” is part of its own stanza. The translator did the same for ages 15 and 16, giving each age a different paragraph. This could signal the different time periods within the poem or the changes that occurred between the two lovers that occurred. However in A Song of Ch’ and Kan, the translator pairs the age groups all within one stanza. The translator may have felt that the age groups were part of the story and needed to flow one after the next. Each line may build of the other providing the need to keep everything together, adding to the creation of one entire picture instead of 4-5 small pictures that tell a similar story. With different placings of the text, each poem can be read differently shaping a similar yet different story of the original poem.
Lastly and the most obvious is the actual words used in each translation. Each translation varies as the words used can either have more meaning, sound simpler, or flow better in each paragraph. In That Parting at Ch’ang Kan, the protagonist hides his face as he is shy to be in the presence of his wife. It states “My shamefaced head I in a corner hung.” In contrast in Two Letters From Chang- Kang- 1 it states “But hung my head, and turned to the dark wall.” In the first translation the meaning has such a stronger feel. The sentence is crafted with a dense definition, highlighting the embarrassment displayed by the character, all the while using simple terms. The second sentence isn’t as vivid as the first as it sounds very plain and boring. As a whole, the entire paragraph lacks detail and cannot compare to the single line from the translation. The use of words is a powerful tool in displaying how something will sound and how it will flow as depicted by the translations.
My favorite translation is by W.J.B Fletcher. In my opinion I felt his poem read with the most fluidity while displaying the compassion between the two characters. The use of the old language made me read the poem as a love story similar to Shakespeare’s writing style. I was able to follow the poem with ease as the simplicity and straightforward words shaped the life of the characters.
2 responses so far ↓
r.beregovich // Mar 31st 2015 at 10:35 pm
I’m really truly impressed by your ability to not only get through Fletcher’s poem, but to actually have read it fluidly. It was the most stilted reading for me, so kudos on that. Personally I didn’t find Fletcher’s poem to be conducive to imagery, probably the way it was written, so again, Kudos on that. I felt the writing was too dated for me to clearly get a sense of the images and emotions the translator was trying to convey.
ms153581 // Apr 2nd 2015 at 9:32 am
I am impressed that you picked up that one translation would depict the different ages over time with different paragraphs and stanzas. This is something that i had overlooked as a difference to notice while i was reading the different translations of the single poem.