S. was a women held captive during the time of war. A guard invaded her home and brought her along with a group of women into a bus without informing them of where they were going. Before they left, they rounded up a group of men and led them outside to kill them all leaving the women helpless and afraid.
Upon arriving at the camp site, they were put into a room where they slept on the concrete floor not knowing what were to happen to them next.
Finally, they were all giving tasks to perform. “At last, she has some sort of task…She feared idleness, feared she would be spending her days sitting on the concrete floor of the warehouse, waiting to be exchange. That is the easiest way to lose your mind.” This helped time pass by quicker inside of waiting fearfully of what were to become of them which could drive somone to insanity.
Although this is definitely not a life they would choose, eventually they realize that there was nothing they could do. No matter what they would either choose death or to adjust to the situation they were in. They had sleep, a toilet, food and nobody beat them. She had accepted it and knew that was her life right now.
“S. can feel herself adapting. Every day she wakes up to something she now recognises…Before she gets up S. repeats to herself: just let this be a good day. She does not know exactly what good means, perhaps to her at that moment it means not to be exposed to humiliation by the guards. nShe learns quickly to ignore what does not directly concern her, not to think about tomorrow. She has learned that she can cope only with the problems of the here and now.”
While observing the people around her, S. believes that in order to survive, she had to be selfish and invisible. Also, she learns that living in a small environment meant that word got around.
“Everything got around, but the news was unreliable, unconfirmed. Even though it is happening right next to you, you don’t believe it. And even if you do believe it, you cannot swell on it, it would be the end of you. You believe it only if you yourself see it. Perhaps this deliberate blindness is a form of self preservation”
Being in such an isolated place, many people talk and everyone hears about it sooner or later. S. hear about the most outrageous cruelties but it is hard to believe something like this actually happens unless you see it for yourself.
During war, people were forced into lives that they didn’t choose. Men were drafted or killed while women were taken away to work in a unknown place. Since they had no power and couldn’t escape, the only thing they could do is make the best out of the situation and try their best to adapt to the only lifestyle they could at that moment. They constantly live in fear, so once there is a daily routine set up for them, they know what to expect and becomes content.
