Monthly Archives: March 2014

Monologue

About 2 years ago, i had the pleasure of spending 2 weeks in a psychiatric facility after a severe depressive episode. While there I encountered many characters. There was the pervy old guy who farted in my face, sweet kid named Malik who liked to frighten the nurses and a bipolar pothead named Charles who was severely in denial about his diagnosis. My favorite, however was a guy called Lil Nate. Lil Nate was this homeless guy who looked like a tiny , black, toothless Santa Claus. He was about 5’2″ and spoke like a tornado. He never bathed and always had this little wet spot on the front of his pants like he’d wet himself, which judging by the smell, he had. You never knew what you were going to get when you spoke to him. It could be really unnerving at times. Everyday he had a new identity for himself. My favorite was Sweetback. Sweetbackwas a badass who taught me how to disarm a gunman, then 2 minutes later Lil Nate was back, telling me that only the devil smiled all the time and that I should stop smiling at him. Then he told me he was father, Elijah Mohammed and things got a little weird. The next day he’d be back to normal, well as normal as he could be. Sometimes Nate was so lucid I wondered if the rest of it was an act. Maybe he just go off on making people squirm.Either way I grew to like the man a lot and apparently he liked me too. He got all misty eyed when he found out I was leaving, and told me I was a good kid and that I should be happy. It was pretty sound advice that I am trying to put into action. About 2 months ago I ran into Lil Nate outside of a store, he was pretty wasted and didn’t remember me, which bummed me out but whatever at least i still have my memories.

Monologue

Everything was about to change

This was my first time about to do something like this

I was scared

What if I tear something what if does hurt like everybody says

Im about to be exposed like never before

Will this be such a pleasurable experience like everyone says

It was all so new, so different

Was I even ready for this?

Well it doesn’t matter now, its too late too back out

My heart was pumping

The air was hot

Anxiety at the max, all my emotions stirring at once

It was now my time to show that I can handle this

My time to prove to people who I am as a person

Finally, they called on the Brooklyn Tech Lady Dragons

I stepped out and lined up with my girls

And we stepped our hearts out that day

It was such an exhilarating experience

And that was the day we took home first place at our step competition

We won first ever since and eventually went to Nationals

The Brooklyn Tech Lady Dragons 2013 Competition Squad was 4th nationally

this picture above is a picture of how i see myself. In this picture i am the little ducky in the middle. i have always been an outcast, not that much always but I’ve always been the quiet one in a group of loud people. Until recently, i have became more bold and more of the loud person in a group of quiet people, but that doesn’t happen often. it’s only when i have the courage to do it. In elementary school and junior high school, i was always really smart. in high school i was the only one or one of at most two in a class. i wasn’t even always the prettiest so that’s why i am a duck and not a swan. I’m just an ordinary 18 year old, African American girl.