It’s too bad not everyone likes dark humor.

Maybe some people just don’t enjoy it, some find it offensive.

We all have to be backwards sometimes,

Life’s too short to be normal.

Some would say the jokes you tell reflect who you are,

but I think characters we employ in our creative works can show our true fears.

Shortly following my cruel joke the other day,

Dave passed away suffering from a zoonotic strain of MRSA.

Coincidentally it was the same week his license was revoked.

May you rest in peace Dave.

After reading my free writings, I saw that I wrote I consider myself lucky, and my family is the biggest reason for that. I really admire three men of my family, my grandfathers and my father, who a learned a lot from. My grandfather, father of my mother, was part of the army, and he taught me a lot a bout discipline and commitment to everything I do. My other grandfather, who I only got to know based on stories I’ve been told, was a hardworking man who provided for the family, thinking about the others before thinking about himself. Like my father, who always put others before him, always giving and never asking anything in return. I believe they are role models and I am lucky to have them in my life.

Waiting on the edge of the bridge, looking for someone to help me on my journey. My feet are tied tight by the rope, with nowhere to go but down. My heart is racing and I can feel the nerves running through me faster than my blood flow. I begin to wonder the reality of my existence, and the affect I want to have on the world. I want to live a long life, have a big family and be able to love and support them unconditionally. My thoughts however are disrupted by the instructor telling me to move towards the edge of the plank. I waddle over with my Siamese legs trying not to take an extra step, and preemptively meet my doom. As the tall strong man counts down, I think about my life up until this point. My parents and siblings who I love so much, the friendships that I cherish, the laughs that I’ve had, and all of the great experiences and accomplishments in my life this far. But before I can begin to think of what my future holds for me, I spread my hands without hesitation, and soar like an eagle into the empty sky.

Sleep is a lovely thing, but when you just cannot your in a new kind of hell. For their is no substitute, you can try to fiend on caffeine but you’ll end up with a stomach ache and a migraine so bad that you swear your brain is saying “fuck you”. The worst part of it all is the diminishment your cognitive capability, a mid term you may have aced falls by at least twenty per cent, your reading slows to a crawl, and you really just want to sleep; even more so then the previous night when you spent 6 hours lying in the dark trying to sleep only to watch the sun rise before you have knotted off.

Now for all those whom read this, let me sleep. Good night

About two months back, I was walking home from work; I was helping a friend at an after school. I saw these kids running around making a lot of noise. I didn’t really pay attention to it until i walked closer and saw what they were doing. The six kids were harassing two children and their mother. The kids made fun of the family’s accent and threw ice chunks at the mother. I was not used to seeing such small children disrespecting an adult. Not sure how to respond, I moved closer to the family and the children backed off a bit. They followed along as I walked with the family back to their home. I still do not know what i should have done, but I have gotten over it.

This image shows how I see myself. I am not sure what kind of person I am and have never really thought about it. Even now after 18 years of life I am not sure how to describe my personality. These random scribbles represent my inability to explain to others who I am and how I am like.

Most people question whether ghosts are real or not. Throughout my life, I have had some interesting run-ins that I assumed were some type of ghost being. When I was 6 I had a jewelry box from my great grandmother who died a few years earlier. The jewelry box was heavy and large and it was never moved off my desk. One day I had a friend over and /i noticed my jewelry box was missing. I asked everyone in my family and everyone said they hadn’t touched it. Later that day I found the box under a bunch of clothes in my closet. Deciding it was a ghost who moved it  I began to question the existence of ghosts. A few years later I heard my mother having a conversation on the phone about how some weird things were happening to her and she blamed it on ghosts as well which furthered my belief.

Ain’t that the way it always starts! (Hail to the amazing Dave Grohl) Friends part after being together for years. People miss each other. It’s sad to leave but you have to go. The plane landed. Oh no, it’s cold… It’s zero degree…

I come to New York for college so how does my school like? Let’s go to class. The first lesson is the History lesson. I still don’t how to pronounce her last name today. Anyway, History is quite easy. Let’s go to the German lesson. Opps! I mean music lesson. Then, it’s the math class! Wait! Where is the professor? Hey, you mean that skater boy is my professor? I know it’s the season for snowboarding, but… Whatever. Everything is going well until afternoon. First, it’s the damn English lesson taught by a crazy cat lady. You know, sitting in such a hot and boring atmosphere makes me feel sleepy after having lunch. But sometimes, the best is yet to come. That accent and that handwriting, that is the sociology professor! Please kill me. In conclusion, male professors are way better than female! ALWAYS!

Let’s talk about the campus. Actually, it’s awesome to go to school at the middle of the city. At least you don’t need to get drunk everyday like the students in upstate. You have fun around you. Do you know what’s great about having a small campus? You don’t need to use 15 minutes to walk and locate your classroom. Um… Maybe! Baruch’s room numbering system is dumb and so wrong.

After all, everything is settled. Everything is nice and done. Let’s think of what am I going to be! Everyone urged me! You little dumbass! Go to study accounting! You have to be an accountant. For what? Why? That’s what they can’t answer me. Anyway, in the whole world, I only give a shit to my parents. Because it’s my parent assigning me this honorable missionary, I have to get it done! I will shut their mouth!

However, you know what? I don’t want to trap myself in a cage for my entire life! Yes! Let’s laugh at me! It’s childish. It’s naïve. College helps us to find our path. At the same time, it helps us to get lost too. We need dedications to find our way. Your time will come if you work hard! Be responsible to yourself. Do all the things you don’t feel like to do. Do that homework. Go revision. Wake up early. Bear that pain. Because sometimes it’s not about you want to do it or not! It’s about you had to do it and how to do it! You must get he job done so one day you can do whatever you want to do after these sorrows.

This is not a picture representing myself but I love this picture. The drummer of Avenged Sevenfold died at 28. (R.I.P. the Rev) You will never know when will you die so seize the day. It is your responsibility to live your life without regrets. There are tons of people want a chance to live like you. Also, I remind myself to stay calm a lot since there are so many times I screw things up because of anger. So keep calm and seize the day.

monologue

I have been in this school for 2 months. and attended this course for many many times.

to be honest, it is a very nice and sweet program especially to me. As it is my first time to go to school in America and everything is still kind of new and strange to me. So I always feel confused about something thing like school policies. And at this point, when I have some questions, I can email to friends or tutors or professors.

And also, I really appreciate that this class dosen’t have homework and it is great.

And, actually, I think if we can watch some movies in class, that will be perfect.

I have been here for almost one year. But until now I am still suffering kind of culture shock.

My English is still not very good, but much better than when I just came here. Now and i can understand general conversation, but still confused about the slangs. It is pleasant to go to college because you guys do help me with some pronunciations like dead and dad. and my favorite now is “ i am cool with it.”

When I came here, I found that i had a new hobby that is to listen to others. and i like repeat some interesting things to me. When i talk to Chinese, i just talk and don’t really listen to the charming part of the language, but now i feel i am a 4 years old baby again and learn something from the beginning again. That’s so nice.

And also some cultural difference like, god bless you. I am still confused about when to say it. i have seen people sneeze, 啊欠，then people say god bless you. but i mean if the people choked can i also say god bless you.

When I came here, i was so surprised that people are very different from what i think.

Before i came here, i tried to watch some American series to get used to here.

I have been to many places in new york and outside since I came here. I have been to many museums, restaurants and bala bala. I think my favorite museum is the cloister museum. And it is awesome.

thank you. xie xie.

I was born in Soviet Union and grew up in Russia. At the age of 17, I’ve visited 14 countries, so I saw the world a little bit. I finished a high school when I was 17 in the small city of Kirov in Central part of Russia. It was a time for me to decide who I wanted to become. When my relative invited me to study in US, I thought it could be a great opportunity for me.

When I moved to the US, I had some problems with my visa, so I couldn’t study for 5 years. Also, I couldn’t go back to Russia and didn’t see my family and friends, but I got through this. So here I am right now at Baruch trying to achieve my goals.