In Pride and Prejudice, there is a moment when Elizabeth is asking Darcy why someone of his breeding/ status in life, is so rude to strangers. The quote below is Darcy’s response to that question. It goes:
“I certainly have not the talent which some people possess,” said Mr. Darcy, “of conversing easily with those I have never seen before. I cannot catch their tone of conversation, or appear interested in their concerns, as I often see done.”
Darcy saying that he can’t talk to new people because he can’t catch their “tone of conversation” might be looked at by most as a quick dismissal of the question at hand. So many people are able to converse with people that they are not familiar with with ease but for Darcy, it is a source of difficulty. The “tone” of a conversation will vary from person to person and group to group. Misreading the tone of a conversation can and usually does, result in awkwardness, misunderstandings and other uncomfortable things. More importantly, Darcy doesn’t say that he doesn’t want to engage in conversations with strangers, he says that he cannot as if he has tried and failed before. His silence around new people is not practiced, it was learned from previous missteps.
Since Darcy is of nobility, he likely had to deal with other nobles and wealthy people who could ruin him if he offend them enough to that sort of action. For him, it is better to appear to be rude. Rudeness is somewhat expected with people of the noble class; Darcy could hide behind that curtain and not speak to strangers. On the other hand, he could not fake interests in the concerns of those he did not know, because he would not be acting as his real self. Moments like this one just add to the extreme complexity and confusion of what we are supposed to think of Darcy.