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Parents Give Permission to Toke Up

July 28, 2011 by bb-pawprint

The hallway outside of Greg Newton’s Harlem loft smells like a jungle of exotic plants. Inside the fourth-floor apartment, the 18-year-old is lying on the floor smoking marijuana from a bong. His eyes are barely open. Awkwardly, Newton’s father sits next to him, seemingly higher than his son.

According to the research, marijuana is the most widely used illegal drug used by American teens today. Approximately 60 percent of teen drug users, smoke marijuana exclusively. Since many teens are using the illegally controlled substance, the question arises whether parents should give them permission to use the drug.

Single mom Beverly White says it is okay. White allows her 17-year-old son Joseph to smoke marijuana in her own home.

White, who first experimented with pot as a teen, said, “My friends were smoking so it seemed like the cool thing to do and I’ve been smoking ever since.”

White viewed her decision of allowing her son to smoke marijuana as a blessing in disguise.

“It actually helped our relationship rather than having a contentious one,” White said.

In fact, she said the decision brought them closer together because her son was honest with her.

While some people, may question White’s parenting skills, she insists that she runs a tight ship at home.

“If he wasn’t taking care of school it would be different,” White said.

There are boundaries to Whites permissiveness. She will not tolerate Joseph drinking. “I have a problem with the drinking because the drinking can lead to alcoholism,” she said.

It was about four month after Joseph started smoking pot that his mother found out about his habit.

“It came time to where I got caught so I told her,” Joseph said.

Joseph said his mother agreed to let him smoke in her house after they had   a long discussion.

He also sees the side effects of his mother’s actions.

“I look at her more as a best friend type than a mother. I can speak to her about anything,” he said.
Others, however, opposed White’s decision to allow her teen child to smoke marijuana.

Jonson Ortiz, a father of two children ages 18 and 25, said that he would not allow his children to smoke pot, calling it “a level of respect.”

“It’s settings up boundaries as to what’s the right thing and how do you want your family being remembered,” Ortiz said.

After being questioned about how a parent’s role would be altered if they allowed their children to smoke pot, adult therapist Cesia Morillo said that the parent becomes less an authority figure and will continue to play it safe.

“I think that the compromising makes it difficult for the child to understand why smoking marijuana is unhealthy in the first place,” Morillo said.

“Some parents sit down, have a conversation, set limits in terms of consequences, but they should never stoop down to their kid’s level just to ease a situation,” said an anonymous volunteer who works for Parent Stress Line, a helpline.

White argues that in her role as a parent, she will always have the upper hand. And while she does allow the pot smoking, she doesn’t condone it.

“I do hope that he stops,” White said.

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