by Arielle LeJarde

Listen to my playlist here.

Being raised in California, I always felt the pressure to be a certain way and look a certain way (“90210” by Wale). My whole life I felt like I wouldn’t be valued unless I fit this stereotypical California girl who was always happy, pretty, and positive. This made me feel alone all the time (“Jesus Christ” by Brand New) and no matter how many friends I had, I didn’t feel like I really belonged.

I decided I needed a change of pace  (“Cough Syrup” by Young the Giant) and four days after I turned 18, I moved back to where I was born (“New York City” by Among Savages) because although I didn’t remember a thing about the place, I felt like that’s where I needed to be. I knew it was going to be hard and I was going to feel alone again, but at least it was going to be on my terms and my decisions.

It was a tough transition because my family and friends weren’t there for me to fall back on (“Empty Space” by The Story So Far) and I had no other choice, but to grow up and be independent. The move here and supporting myself (“Creator” by Santogold) made me realize those materialistic things I valued back in California didn’t matter in the real world. Living in New York for the past year made me come to terms that I can’t change the way I am (“The Real Slim Shady” by Eminem) so I might as well accept it and own it (Power by Kanye West). If there is negativity that comes with finally being myself (Don’t Kill My Vibe by Kendrick Lamar) then so be it, but for now I guess I can just enjoy being young and doing me. (The Good Life feat. T Pain by Kanye West)

“Don’t look back, you’re not going that way.”

http://grooveshark.com/#!/playlist/Baruch+FRO+Playlist/90556282

(Here’s an accurate translation of “Damaged Lady” by KARA, for those who cannot understand Korean: Damaged Lady)

While going through the music I enjoy listening to, I noticed I had music that would describe me well. Recently, I learned on how well they relate to my life, as well as my past with the progression of my character up to this point. Starting with Adam Young’s remix on his song “Fireflies”, it introduces the imaginative and innovative character I can have. I tend to be a creative thinker in an artistic form. As Professor Layton’s theme song plays, it signifies much classy potential and how I do enjoy a more luxurious, proper life. It’s not my lifestyle, per say, but I would be able to handle such a lifestyle if I am to engage in one in the future. Wonder Girls’ “2 Different Tears” through Taylor Swift’s “Mean” brings about a period of my life where I have dealt with some meaningful hardships.

As a middle school student, I was quite teased for my size. The school I went to at the beginning of middle school brought about constant drama for me, as well as a dramatic decrease in my academic performance. I eventually had to transfer schools and slowly work up a new character in a new environment, while close to home. KARA’s “Damaged Lady” and “2 Different Tears” focuses more on no longer being friends with a person who’s drastically changed my life for the better. For years, that friend made changes that I never thought could happen for a person like me, but they happened and I couldn’t have been more grateful. It was painful letting that person go, but I had to accept the fact and move on, in order to progress and improve my well-being.

Rachel Platten’s “Work Of Art” speaks of my revelation of the position in life I was in. I realized that I am just as special and gifted as the next person and that I should take the masterpiece that I am and use it to its full potential. With newly grown confidence, I picked myself and took myself to new heights. It also co-exists with Paramore “Ignorance”, where I’ve begun to push any and all hatred to the side and progressed with my life outside of the unnecessary things.

Michael Bublé’s “Cold December Night” points out the more romantic side of me, while suggesting my great passion for the winter season. Winter and the holidays always warm my heart, as I become more hopeful than usual to find someone that will make me happy. I know; it’s pretty cliché, but everyone has their fantasies and wishes, right? As the playlist ends at “Born This Way” by Lady Gaga & Christina Aguilera’s “Beautiful”, they state a fact that I will never forget: I am born the way I am and no one can take that away from me. I am to accept myself for who I am and be happy with myself.

Thanks for reading about me!