Go outside for thirty minutes, and take a walk in any direction. Notice what you observe, what you feel, what you think. Imagine that you are going to turn that thirty minutes into a chapter in a novel and try to notice as much as possible about your experience as you can.
When you get back, take fifteen minutes to write down what you have observed. Submit at least one paragraph from what you’ve written in the comments.
Walking through the busy streets of early morning Queens on my way to work. A tree hangs over the bridge that I cross dropping berries on the ground that have dried up by the sun. My usual morning walk to the train station, swealtered by the sun. Busy streets, having to look both ways at every street acknowledging the ways and dangers of the cars passing by. After the train ride walking to my store, city workers have a giant hose spraying gallons of water almost flooding the streets. Having to hop over a giant puddle to avoid wetting my shoes. This new neighborhood in Long Island is quieter and with less car blocks away from a busy major roadway. Hours later walking back home times are dark and weather is cool. Streets quieter than earlier, no adventure at night but just an easy stroll home.
Some very nice details here. Did your experience feel difference because you knew you had to document what you observed?
I’m walking to the only supermarket in my neighborhood that has oat milk with a baseball cap that fails to protect my eyes from the sun. It’s Friday afternoon, a few hours before my work shift, and the streets are emptier than usual. The sound of birds chirping surrounds me, and it all feels like it’s coming from somewhere else, like the sky. The birds are not on the tree branches. When I face them, only after the sound of their branches moving to the beat of the wind consumes me, I notice the gaps between the branches and how the light tries fitting between the cracks like a hand held up to the sun with all five fingers spread apart. The sun is strong, so I can only look up every now and then, and when it’s finally time to look down, not out of choice but out of necessity for my own eyes, I notice houses that I wish were mine: a real home, with a porch, a front lawn, and two floors that don’t seem divided by tenants, and there’s a kiddie pool in front of the parking garage. The water looks extra refreshing today. I see lines of cars parked, four consecutive ones in different shades of red, and it makes me think about my mother, how growing up she was always faithful to specific shades of lipstick, all of them different shades of red. There are still no people around me, except for the two people who walk towards me once I make it to a block overtaken by an elementary school, and I continue to think about my mom, how she would take me to school every morning and I would cry every time she left me until I leveled up to second grade. I think about this until I arrive at the supermarket, one block over, and then I cross my fingers and hope they have the milk I like.
Really powerful variety of thoughts and impressions here: combining immediate sensory perceptions and memories. It feels very Woolfian. Nicely done.
Heading out into the bright suns of the beautiful day; I hear my mother chatting away like an ebullient little girl; that is incapable of keeping her mouth shut. I was sauntering outside of my apartment; remembering her scathing words from the day before; “You look so nasty with that hair of yours! You look like a beast! Aren’t you ever going to get a haircut?” A curmudgeon face on her part. And I tried to maintain a face of composure, there wasn’t anything else for me to utter back to her; for Mother knew that it was necessary for me to acquire a haircut; I cannot stand the jollity in her voice, it is similar to an incontinent child. I walked out of my apartment, encountering the blazing sun, even the pavements right in front of my walk were shining from the radiant sun that was above. My back was beginning to sweat enormously, and soon it looked like I had gone through a fountain of water when I walked right into the cold barbershop. My barber looked right at me, I was rather tear-stained, and looked at me with a rather sympathetic face. He said something in Spanish, and he pointed to the chair that I would sit in for the next thirty minutes of my life. I couldn’t understand what he was saying but I knew that he wanted to cut my hair. When my session was over, I walked right back out into the oppressive and humid atmosphere of Webster Avenue. There was the incessant noise of honking horns from various cars that were rapidly moving past me on my back to my apartment. Still the temperature is the same. Rather oppressive, becoming similar to the temperature of a sauna. Once again I am perspiring as I am going through the heat, and preparing myself for praise, and then hours later mordant words from my mother.
You do an excellent job of capturing your relationship to your mother, but I’d like some more details about what you saw, felt, heard, thought about in your walk to and from the barbershop.
The first two things I noticed as I am walking out of my building is the sound of the 7 train making its way above me as well as the scorching heat. With my headphones attached to me, I began trotting my way down the block. Despite always feeling safe in my neighborhood, I over analyze my surroundings. Why are there a group of guys standing outside the bodega? I crossed the street and decided to play it safe. As I entered the gym, I scanned my card and made my way upstairs to do some benchpresses. Despite the heat, there are plenty of people inside the gym working out. The guy to my right doing deadlifts… just wow. I strive to be able to lift just as much as him one day. I glance at my arms – very puny, may I add. As I was waiting for a group of friends to finish their sets, I noticed a couple of familiar faces. What are the odds? I haven’t seen this person since we graduated from middle school and I only live three blocks away from the gym. This world is oddly small. My memories of middle school halts the moment a girl, around my age, walked past me with a gallon of iced cold water. Now I can’t wait to get home and drink some cold water. I should have let my water bottle chill in the fridge for an hour before I had gone to the gym today… Oh, well. I’ll survive, I thought to myself as the bench press was finally free and began with my workout routine for the day.
You do a nice job of demonstrating how the past intrudes into the present, how running into a rando person triggers memories of your middle school. But what memories specifically did it trigger? How did those memories affect your mood?
When I opened the door and was about to go out, a car downstairs just pulled into the driveway. A Jewish ‘’grandfather’’ dressed in traditional clothes just came home, he waved to me and implied to say hello, because he had just opened the door of his car, and I just stayed in the balcony. We just looked at each other for that moment, which startled me and made me feel very happy. I get the impression that traditionally dressed Jews aren’t too enthusiastic. One of my friends always said I look like a Jewish girl, I don’t get how ridiculous he is, I am an Asian it did was born and raised in China. The air-conditioner on the third floor was roaring. I was going down to the first floor, across the street, the second-floor balcony a big dog that was carefully guarding its master and that newborn baby, I often see them from the window of home, they often enjoy the sunshine there. The dog and I kept looking each other for a while, a game feeling that whoever looked away would lose. Ginkgo trees on both sides of roads are lush, I always feel the leaves of ginkgo tree especially artistically beautiful. One tree near home there was a balloon stuck inside and it had been stuck there for many days. It was a pink one with the letters of Happy Birthday Girl, I have a strong feeling that it is a gift from God. After passing a small church, crossing the main road, I come to a park nearby, there are so many people here seem not affected by the heat wave anymore. Anyway, I was feeling happy, a little bit hot, listening to the songs of AKB48. The park was so big that it took me almost an hour to walk around it, and I was used to it. This moment with such heat wave I was suddenly feeling so familiar with, one very hot summer, I traveled to Japan. Travel, the word. A few years ago, I came to The United States with my family. At that time, I was deeply attracted by Japanese culture, the animation, the fashion and my AKB48. At that time, I was still young, even naïve, and full of passion. My parents do not agree my plan that I directly go to Japan to my education, then live there. America, New York, Manhattan, and upper East Side, Central Park… Some of my high classmates were so crazy about it because of Gossip Girl, a popular “Toxic” American drama, full of fantasy. About Japan, so do I, full of fantasy, the cartoon, fashion, and J-pop. I tried to figure out why Japan makes my heart be beating so faster, faster, and faster. Then I took a journey to explore it. I went to Japan twice, every time was a week, one time was with a local Japanese friend, he took me to experience very traditional Japanese culture, the other one I went to visit one of my high school classmates, my good friend, he is sincere love with Japan. I changed my perspective of this country, this peaceful and beautiful country is only suitable for travel, not suitable for life, at least I think so. Awkward atmosphere (repression), patriarchy, status of women, Shiori Ito…I’m a little disappointed. This is pretty place, don’t judge, nothing is perfect, I try to persuade myself. I don’t feel that excited of listening the AKB48’smusic …Gradually I am falling in love the place I am living right now, I like discovering something “weirdo” I think I am the kind as well, I can accept all if they are legal. I wouldn’t understand why people can eat BBQ at such a hot day, I inhaled the smoke by accident, not that delicious. the school, thinking of my major, accounting, finally I finished my accounting major under this ridiculous policy, I did it, tired, no soul. The music of At My Worst was playing, I love this music… facing the uncertain future, I am growing up, growing old…I am so scared, and so excited, I am going insane. A huge husky was coming to me, we got eye contact accidently, its eyes are beautiful, such a silly cutie pie. I was melting, I saw Dunkin not far away, I was feeling better suddenly.
Nice job offering a stream-of-consciousness narrative! You really offer a compelling evocation of the way your mind free-associates. Did knowing you were going to write it all down change the way you experienced the afternoon?
I walk out of the building and instantly feel the heat that I had been avoiding all day. How could it possibly be this hot? I wonder. I hate the heat. If were to go to hell and it was just eternity in today’s weather, that would be enough to torture me. No other punishment necessary. Did Satan’s Pandaemonium have air conditioning? Maybe that’s why he left. Or maybe that’s the ultimate punishment, sitting in the heat of hell knowing that one block over Satan and his friends sat in a big castle with air conditioning, TV and wifi. Should I call someone for a ride? I am only a few blocks from my house, but the last thing I want to do is walk. Birdie is going to be around at some point today. Maybe she’s in her car now and wants to come and get me. I dial her number. Straight to voicemail. No dice.
I guess I’m walking.
I walk down the building driveway and onto the sidewalk and see someone jogging on the other side of the street. Why would anyone leave their house voluntarily on a day like today? This is horrible. I’ve walked twenty feet and already I’m exhausted. Well at least if I collapse on the side of the road the ambulance that would come to transport me to the hospital should have air conditioning. Ok, maybe that’s a bit much. Also, I’m pretty hungry and if I needed to be transported I probably wouldn’t get to eat anything for a while. Best to try to avoid that. Maybe some music will help the walk to go faster. I look at my phone and open Spotify. Who am I feeling today? Grateful Dead? No that’s definitely not going to up my energy level. Ramones? I’m not sure I can handle that. Just thinking about someone yelling “I don’t wanna walk around with you” in my ear right now makes me wince. Another time. Maybe I want to listen to an album? I’m kind of thinking Aqualung or Bat Out of Hell. Energetic enough to keep me moving through the stifling humidity, but not frenetic enough to make me forget where I am going. Rock, but more theatrical and cohesive. I’m thinking Aqualung. If I time it right I will get the strange but intriguing mix of gritty and classical to carry me through the rest of my walk and then I will be able to enjoy the simple beauty of Wond’ring Aloud and the awesomeness that is My God and Hymn 43 from the comfort of my couch. Sun streaking cold/ an old man wandering lonely. Ok, yeah that’s definitely better. I feel my shoulders relax slightly and my walk gets a little more enjoyable.
This is really funny and compelling. You have a smart, down-to-earth, authentic voice. In a few places, it sounds more like the kind of riffing writers do when they sit down and think back on their experiences rather than the thoughts and perceptions one might have in the moment. But this does a great job of capturing your mood.
Walking outside my building my first thought looking outside the windows “what beautiful sunny afternoon” what an honest misconception. One step outside and I can already feel It’s hotter than I expected. You can feel the dry temperature rise from the ground and vapor hitting your face instead of winds. And as I start walking, heading to the train station I was instantly regretting I had wished for the summer when it was winter. I can feel my sweat and I haven’t walked a full block. As I continued walking I thought, is winter better than summer or is this extreme weather making everyone uncomfortable? The flowers are burnt from the sun, but we still have flowers. My neighbors have a towel in hand, drying their face while others are using papers to fan themselves under the tree. “Thank you” I said to the lady that held the door for me as I quickly stopped at the corner store to get a beverage. I stepped back outside and realized, the weather is extremely hot but there’s still people outside. But one thing that’s consistent during any extreme weather, is that one jogger on your block. I can complain a lot about any extreme temperature but one thing is for sure the winter is not better than the summer.
All these posts are making me glad I’m in Vermont right now! You offer some really vivid details here about what you saw and how you felt. Did this exercise change the way you perceived your surroundings at all?
I live in the in-between. I always had two views; the fast-paced city views with the busy roads and loud music; and on the other hand, we had the suburbs where the sunbeams illuminated the magnolia grandiflora, which had a pearlescent tint. The ambient music in the dawn chorus was melodious and I took it all in; it was so tranquil. My mind was flooding with thoughts of life ahead, and I decided to live for that moment and bathe in this glorious scenery. Ever so often, my life just feels so chaotic, and just at this very moment, I feel at peace. The thought of being able to control which path I choose makes me feel in control, and every day I wake up I tell myself that in life you have choices and to choose wisely because I am the one living with these choices.
I love the opening. But how exactly do you live in the in-between? Do you mean you can see the city in the distance but you’re surrounded by the suburbs? You could specify your location a bit more precisely here.
Walking through Central Park in the afternoon as I walk my dog. There’s people jogging, ridding there bikes, and other people walking their dog. The sun is out and there is not a cloud in sight. The birds are flying through the sky and I can hear someone walking by as they speak loudly into there phone. My dog gives me a tug he must’ve seen another dog and got excited. As expected it was another dog and they began to smell each other and shortly after we continue to walk. As we continue to walk people stop me and ask if they can pet my dog, I say yes but as always my dog is shy around other people. We continue to walk home and as we are walking we see our neighbor. We both greet each other and continue on our separate ways. As I get in my apartment I feel the nice cold ac hit me and immediately after I clean my dogs paws and put some cold water in his bowl. I slowly make my way in to the room as I see my cat going to her bed. As soon as I lay down on my bed I get a little sleepy and by the time I know it I’m awake. I look at the time and a hour passed by I must have fallen asleep.
You offer some vivid details about your walk. But if Woolf were describing it, she would also indicate how you were feeling and what you were thinking from moment to moment.
Today I took a long walk around my neighborhood, and it turned out to be very interesting. As I was walking, I experience a range of emotions. I felt relaxed and anxious. I also notice a few peculiar things regarding people’s behavior. Since it was a hot day, I wore adequate clothing. I put on green shorts, blue shirt and I decide to go with converse as choice of footwear. I live across the street of a decent size park. So, as soon as I walked out of my apartment building, I see the park full of people and I immediately knew I was going to encounter a lot of people on the streets. Which I found it to be unusual on a day where the temperature was around 95 degrees. Hence, I told myself here we go let’s see what I encounter in the next 30 minutes.
What did you encounter in the next 30 minutes? You offer a clear and description of the first couple moments of the walk, but you haven’t said quite enough about the rest of it.
I just wanted to write enough to make the beginning of my story interesting. If this was a real novel/story, I want the reader to have the desire to keep wanting to read more.
I walk out of the building watching all the kids play out in front our complex in the evening reminding me of all the times me and my friends with play out in the front entrance in the hot summer evening. Living in the area for the past 17 years everything is very familiar. All these little kids have grown up in front of our eyes reminding me of how old I have become. For some reason, I feel like taking a stroll near my schools. I say schools because my elementary school and high school are nearby. My first stop was to my elementary school. It had been a long time since I’ve been there, and I’ve seen how much it changed. I saw that there was now a playground there. This reminded me of the time when we were not allowed to go outside because there was construction to create the playground, but we have never been able to play at it because by the time it will be complete, I have graduated. Now there was current construction to create a smaller building where the trailers were that used to be our classrooms. As I walk a few blocks forward was my high school. For some reason my high school had always been a placed I visited the most even when I was a kid because that was the park that had swings. I remember begging my mom to take me there all the time and having to stand in line just to use the swings because all the kids were on the line for the swings as well. For some reason the walk this week was reminding me of all the time they have passed but this time there was no one near the swings.
I walk out of the building watching all the kids play out in front of our complex in the evening, reminding me of all the times me and my friends had played out in the front entrance in the hot summer evening. Living in the area for the past 17 years everything is very familiar. All these little kids have grown up in front of our eyes reminding me of how old I have become. For some reason, I feel like taking a stroll near my school. I say schools because my elementary school and high school are nearby. My first stop was to my elementary school. It had been a long time since I’ve been there, and I’ve seen how much it has changed. I saw that there was now a playground there. This reminded me of the time when we were not allowed to go outside because there was construction to create the playground, but we have never been able to play at it because by the time it will be complete, I have graduated. Now there is current construction to create a smaller building where the trailers were that used to be our classrooms. As I walked a few blocks forward was my high school. For some reason my high school had always been a place I visited the most even when I was a kid because that was the park that had swings. I remember begging my mom to take me there all the time and having to stand in line just to use the swings because all the kids were on the line for the swings as well. For some reason the walk this week was reminding me of all the time they have passed but this time there was no one near the swings.
* A revised version.
Interesting details. As in Mrs. Dalloway, what you observes continually takes you into your past. Your description demonstrates how our minds are continuously moving out of the present moment.