Summary

"Why don't you participate often?" asked my teacher in elementary school. I answered, "I don't know," when in reality, I knew exactly why. I was shy, not extremely shy, not very shy, just shy. Like most boys my age, I still had a group of friends with whom I was close. I just disliked going out of my comfort zone. In class, I would feel nervous when being called on to read anything, whether it be a play, poem, or book. Dread filled me whenever I was unluckily called on. Even outside of school, I wouldn't say I liked meeting new people. I recall being at a wedding with my parents and following them while hiding behind their backs.
I started participating more in middle school but still got that nervous tingle when called on to read. Doing a ton of group projects and presenting them was very helpful in reducing my stage fright. Overall, middle school helped me come out of my shell little by little but never entirely. That would only happen in high school. Going into high school, I was, of course, nervous but also excited for a new beginning. I vividly recall my first day meeting my new classmates. We were split into groups of five or six to discuss amongst ourselves anything that came to mind. It helped break down some barriers between my new classmates and me. I was still hesitant to participate consistently, and I even recall my face heating up a bit mid-discussion. Everyone in the group was friendly, so it went well. My first year in that class was fun, to say the least; I was in a class full of troublemakers. While I had many good laughs, I didn't quite fit in well since I wasn't a troublemaker and never could be since I disliked being the center of attention. I also wasn't using my full potential academically. I didn't care about school partially because of my environment, and I was upset when I saw my first report card. I was friendly with everyone in the class but never became super close with any of them. Instead, my closest friends happened to be in a different class. One of my close friends, Reuben, suggested that I should switch to his class. At first, I dismissed the idea; I was having fun, right? Then I thought about how even though I was having fun, I wasn't close to anyone in my class.
So, in my sophomore year of high school, I was plopped into a semi-new environment: new people and mindsets. Everyone warmly welcomed me, and having friends in my new class considerably eased my nerves. In this class, I truly broke out of my shell. I participated regularly and even enjoyed contributing. Contrarily, my new peers cared about their academics and were studious. This new environment that stimulated me to participate more also made me start caring more about my grades. My grades vastly increased, which made me incredibly proud of myself. The second semester was going very well; I made new friends, improved my grades, and was all around happier. Then COVID struck. At first, like many others, I thought COVID was a joke. It's just a type of flu; how bad could it be? Welp, I was very wrong. When it was getting bad in NY, I remember being in the car with my mom, who said she didn't want me to go to school the next day due to Covid. At the time, I was ecstatic to have a day off; little did I know that I would not return to school for a year. Zoom classes were exciting initially; seeing all my friends again, albeit through a screen, made me happy. Waking up a minute before class was typical for me, and I sometimes skipped class. School just didn't feel real; life did not even feel real. The lack of physical interaction between friends and teachers further emphasized this feeling. When my school finally opened up again, seeing all my friends made me ecstatic. Unfortunately, social distancing, barriers, and face masks were the new norm. This made interacting with others challenging, but I was happy to be back.
I came back with a drive to succeed in school. Academically, that was probably my best year ever. As restrictions eased a little, everyone felt more comfortable in class. I fully felt like I was part of the class at that point. The following year of school, senior year came quickly. All of a sudden, college was thrown onto us. I kept up my grades, wrote essays, and submitted my applications. Changing my mindset when switching classes was one of the deciding factors in getting into Baruch. When graduation rolled around, I was sad that I wouldn't be seeing my classmates all the time. After graduation, we met up once again in school to receive our diplomas and yearbooks. Signing everyone's yearbook brought back many memories. It was a bittersweet moment and the start of a new beginning.
Looking back on this journey, I realize that branching out and meeting new people is one of life's greatest joys. Every single person has a story waiting to be told. The worst that can happen is you don't click with them. I wish I had known that sooner. My whole experience was fruitful, and I am incredibly grateful for all my friends.