iLand Getaway

A Satirical Utopia by: Cate Larsen, Anjelica Mantikas, and Kai-Cong Fam

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We the pixels… in order to form a civil society amongst the chaos and confusion do ordain and establish this Constitution for iLand Getaway.

Section 1.

All legislative power shall be given to the five Founding Fathers and no other persons will take any place amongst them as long as they are living.

Mark Zuckerburg, Bill Gates, Tim Cook, Larry Page, and Dick Costolo

Section 2.

A priority must always be given to anti-social members of the world and their acceptance into iLand Getaway should be expedited. All other applicants must wait for available spots.

Section 3.

Members will not be allowed to leave their cubical complexes once they enter into the society. All activities – sleeping, eating, using the bathroom and entering the virtual world must be done in each individual member’s complex. They must trust that the founding fathers have their best interest in mind with every action they take.

Section 4.

If a member of iLand Getaway does not follow any instruction given to him or her by the founding fathers, they will be separated from their Internet connection to suffer from severe boredom, or asked to leave the society altogether. The founding fathers will punish accordingly depending on the severity of the crime and repetition of offenses.

Section 5.

If a member is caught hacking any part of the system or cyber-bullying, they will be punished accordingly or asked to leave. Additionally, any person may leave if they do so choose. Any exit is permanent.

Section 6.

Each citizen of iLand Getaway has the right to free speech as long as it does not interfere with the rules of cyber-bullying. Debate is encouraged for entertainment. Caps lock is discouraged.




As ISIS militants advanced to the United States and Ebola began infecting millions more throughout the world, a group of tech company founders and CEOs decided to create their own utopian experiment: iLand Getaway. Since the real world had become a dystopia, this new society became a way for people to escape the realities that surrounded them. The five Founding Fathers of our society are Bill Gates (Co-founder, Microsoft), Tim Cook (CEO, Apple), Larry Page (CEO, Google), Mark Zuckerberg (CEO, Facebook), and Dick Costolo (CEO, Twitter).

The government is run by the five Founding Fathers and their primary role is to make sure the virtual world is always working. Perhaps the most important task the Founding Fathers have is to make sure the Wifi connection never drops. They also assign jobs and watch over what society members are doing in the virtual world. While each founding father is respected highly, it is Mark Zuckerberg that is idolized most by the society. Therefore, he often addresses the society members and secretly is behind god’s Facebook page.

Each member of this utopia has willingly joined this society through an application and interview process. The Founding Fathers read each application of those who wish to enter into the society, and decide what role each will play based on his or her skills. Those who are accepted must pay a fee of $1,000 to the Founding Fathers. There is an ongoing affirmative action initiative for anti-social nerds since this is a lifestyle that they have always desired. There is no oppression or attempt to create a divide between the people. Those who have worthy applications but are lacking appropriate funds are permitted to work their way in by manning some of the aspects of life within the buildings where iLanders reside.

The Relationship between the sexes:     

When a member is accepted into iLand Getaway, he or she will never again be face to face with any human being. Thus, he or she is able to choose their gender when they enter into the society. Once their gender has been chosen, they cannot change it because it is not just an image but their very being. All relationships – and subsequently all dates – are online. When two members are dating, they engage in private chat messaging for an hour or so depending on how great their “date” is going. They may surf the web together, play games, and match their avatars. They can also send gifts such as new clothes or 3D printed food they coded. Since a majority of the members are anti-social nerds, they prefer these types of relationships. There is no physical contact between two people in a relationship. This is satisfying enough to the members of the society.

Members are attracted to each other based on personal profiles in the virtual world. Each member has a personal profile and an image of their virtual avatars. This allows a fifty-year-old woman to become young and beautiful again in this new society. It does not matter if this is a lie, because no one will ever meet! When a person is not happy with how their virtual avatar looks, they are able to get surgery to make them more attractive. By adding pixels to their body and taking away some pixels from their nose, the virtual person can look brand new!

Men and women in the virtual world are also friends. Unlike the chaotic dystopia outside their society in which women are seen as unequal to men, this society treats everyone the same. Virtual men are respectful towards virtual women in this society and both can hold the same types of member roles which they receive the same amount of virtual pay for (game creators, coders, etc.).


There is a god of iLand Getaway, and he indirectly communicates with society members through the Facebook page of the technological visionary Steve Jobs, who has passed away and now is an intercessor. Citizens post questions on his wall and Jobs is presumed to place the request before god and promptly respond from the afterlife. While people believe it is really god answering them back through the medium of Steve Jobs, it is actually Mark Zuckerberg. He programmed the same automatic responses to people’s Facebook posts since many of the questions are silly and repetitive. By analyzing wall posts that are requesting something (prayers), Mark Zuckerberg is able to take this information and deliver the virtual services that people want such as new avenues of social media or faster WiFi. His response is proof enough to the people that god exists.

The members’ interest in speaking to god has more to do with curiosity than dedication to religion. Other than the occasional Facebook post, religion is not highly regarded in the society. Most members left the dystopia in hopes that they would forget their pain and sorrow from that world. Thus, religion does not play a major part in their lives unless they really need something.

Science and Technology:

iLand Getaway would not be a possibility without the existence of certain technologies, as every waking moment is lived in the cyber world. Citizens experience this world via a contact lens they put in their eyes called an iLens, courtesy of Google CEO and founding father Larry Page, with an Apple-inspired name from Apple CEO Tim Cook. This contact lens takes minimal experience to operate. Once worthy applicants are admitted into the community, they insert a lens into each eye and have instant access to the Internet directly in their field of vision! In the cubicles they call home, citizens use their iLens to perform basic keyboard and mouse functions. They are therefore able to scroll, select, and type using their eyes. Certain blinking patterns “click” on things. These efficient technologies make for a limited use of electricity. As a matter of fact, the compounds in which citizens live use up little to no energy at all, as no lights need to be on for a person who is not living in the real world. All light and life comes from the iLens; that is reality. The human body has been replaced by a virtual graphic avatar, which can be modified via Photoshop at any time. Another important piece of technology is the 3D food printer, a food source on special occasions. Citizens customize a food design online and print it, the greatest effort they will ever need to take when it comes to their meals.

Health and Wellness:

In order to keep the eyes functioning well, users must insert eye drops to charge and moisturize their lenses every single day. A few additional health concerns arise with this world of virtual reality. Clearly there is the essential component of exercise missing from this virtual life. Fortunately, the technological innovation of the founding fathers provided for this: citizens have a comfortable chair in which they sit all day and live the majority of the rest of their lives. The chair has a footrest, which is set on a timer to automatically push up and down, leading the citizen’s resting legs to stretch and move with it. Windows are built into each room, allowing the sun’s rays to provide sufficient amounts of nutrients like vitamin D, crucial for wellbeing and survival.

As for essential liquid consumption, it must be revealed that this living chair is nothing but a glorified toilet, the only source of electricity in the community, and powered by the outside workers who labor for their admittance into the community due to a lack of funds. When a citizen needs to drink, they pull a tube that extends from one of two small holes in the top of the chair. All they need to do for a gulp of fresh and purified water is a quick sip from the tube. The second tube emerging from the adjacent hole in the “chair” has the other end surgically placed inside of the citizen before their entrance into the society. In this way, inhabitants of iLand Getaway are literally attached to the chair. When excretory needs occur, citizens can therefore release themselves without ever having to get up or leave their world and press a lever located on the back right of the chair to get rid of waste.

Inside of a flap on the right armrest of the chair is a compartment filled with approximately 100 small pills called Foodamins which are promptly refilled by the outside workers. These mass-produced pills are a source of essential nutrients created by the Founding Fathers and their teams of scientists so that citizens no longer have to eat food, which is both expensive to produce and buy, and takes too much time to cook and consume. Each pill is compacted with all essential nutrients, is ingested three times a day, and is refilled once a month by the previously mentioned workforce. On special holiday occasions, a 3D printer installed in the room uses a design program and electricity reserves to print out steaming artificial meals that at least taste like the real thing.

When diseases arise and worsen to an unbearable degree, the afflicted citizen can appeal to the god profile page for help. God then Direct Messages the patient a link to an online chat with a medical doctor in the outside world. A technology in the iLens is able to monitor the citizen’s vital aspects such as breathing pattern, heart rate, and blood pressure. After the doctor peruses this information, the two text back and forth about the symptoms in question, and the doctor assigns pills which are readily brought by the workers and inserted into a flap on the left armrest. Sometimes the doctor will suggest that the citizen drinks more out of their water tube. If a life threatening illness arises and a pill cannot help the citizen, he or she is unfortunately deemed inadequate to function in iLand Getaway, and is deported back to the outside world.

Human Rights:

Every person in this virtual reality world has sacrificed his or her right to privacy. They are never truly alone, despite the fact that they live on a chair in a small, empty hole. All Internet activity is made public on their many social profiles and monitored by the Founding Fathers’ staff made up of the outside workers. Hourly updates must be posted daily (though it is not uncommon to see much more) on what is going on in one’s life: “Had a great chat-date with John280 tonight!” “Just took a refreshing sip of water from the tube!” Though they are not allowed to hack into and manipulate each other’s accounts, the Founding Fathers are permitted to hack into theirs if a rule has been violated that needs to be erased. This widespread publicity makes any dissension easily apparent.

All citizens are given full, unrestricted rights to free speech. On forums and in discussions they are entitled to hold, and even fight over, their own opinions as long as no rule is violated in the process. Any of the members are able to leave the society if they feel it is not for them. However, once they leave, they are not welcomed back.


The rules governing this society are adhered to and violations are quickly prevented, spotted and corrected due to the public nature of daily life. There is absolutely no hacking or viruses of any kind allowed. This type of hacking is not merely changing somebody’s Internet presence, but violating their very existence, in essence their virtual entity. On a similar note, cyber-bullying is a punishable offense. Because every action on the Internet leaves a record, there is no private space in which demeaning bullying can be secretly done. Finally, nobody is allowed to access any information from the outside world. This is a readily followed law, as members want absolutely nothing to do with the real, destructive, and painful world. Such a law is never rebelled against, as existence in iLand comes about by voluntary admission and in order to escape from that dystopian world. The Founding Fathers and their employees may hack into anybody’s profile not adhering to the rules and delete inappropriate posts, temporarily deactivate the account as a form of punishment (leading to severe boredom), or even permanently delete it as the most severe form of punishment. Since this is a mostly virtual society, a hacker is endangering the members of the society and must be dealt with accordingly. The only way a member is forced out of the society by the five Founding Fathers is if he or she hacks the system repeatedly. Repeat offenders are returned back into the real world where they will have to deal with disease, terrorists and daily interactions with other human beings.

The Founding Fathers also have access to everybody’s online history, which cannot be erased from their records. Certain red flags in one’s Internet history alerts the CEOs to inappropriate activity, which is then quickly dealt with according to the degree and quantity of the violation.



In iLand Getaway everyone receives an education because the Founding Fathers believe that every one of their members deserved a great education. However, everyone receives an individualized education based on his or her aptitudes and interests. Upon his or her first day in iLand, each person is given recommended subjects to study, with the exception of basic computer programming. Basic computer programming is taught to every member because it allows them to appreciate the virtual world built by the Founding Fathers, and it is also necessary for most members to develop their own careers and sense of purpose in the virtual world.

The founding fathers created one school which is mandatory for every member to attend. The school exists as a virtual campus where avatars gather and learn in virtual classrooms. The school offers classes that could be taken within the campus and also purely online. Pure online classes are classes that are already prerecorded, and could be taken at any point of time. An outside teacher records himself/herself explaining a subject, and he/she uploads this recording on the class portal for students to learn. Hybrid classes are classes that combine online learning and conference learning. In addition to pre-recorded videos, students (in the form of their avatars) have to meet with their teachers on campus for discussions.

Work and Economics:

            There are two spheres of work in iLand Getaway: one that takes place within the community, and another from the outside. Plumbing, Foodamin deliveries, WiFi maintenance, and resolving of 3D printing issues, for example, must be manned by outside workers. As previously mentioned, these are people who did not get into iLand immediately upon application, but were selected to have the opportunity to buy their admittance in via work. They must gather five years of good work before admittance is allowed.

In iLand Getaway, most members code for a living. Upon application review, citizens are assigned to aid in the functioning of certain types of websites, whether it is gaming, dating websites, advertisements, or Photoshop. Members code to make the virtual world a better place. Coding is instrumental in making iLand a more enjoyable residence. From the construction of new user-friendly websites to new applications, coding gives members the great satisfaction of literally creating their own utopia, as opposed to their previous lives over which they had no control. The owners of certain websites and apps are continuously running maintenance, creating updates to fix any bugs, and keeping up with current technological trends.

Citizens do not have a strict 9-5 work day. Rather, they work for as long as it takes per day to update their respective websites. They are paid in the form of a virtual currency called BitCoins each time they make an update, promoting creativity and technological advances. They also receive revenues from the apps and websites they have created. Since the members live in the virtual world as their avatars, they don’t need much because they can simply code what ever they wish to have such as avatar appearance and clothing. However, all applications and some website services cost money, as does the 3D printer food. The rest of their earnings mostly go to the government in the form of tax, in which their BitCoins provide for all that the members need to live as a human being in the physical world (for example, Foodamins and toilet plumbing).

Above all, the members are motivated to work for fame. In this world, fame is highly esteemed by every member. When a member codes something remarkable, the whole population of iLand Getaway will know them, allowing him or her to have more social interactions in the virtual world.

Many members also become famous through their electronic musical talents, intellect, and other forms of creativity. When one becomes famous, he or she becomes a public commodity, known as a Socialite, which other members bid on via “likes”. When a member gives a Socialite a “like”, he or she is essentially investing in the Socialite. If the Socialite does something remarkable and becomes even more “likable”, then all investors earn a small sum of BitCoins and vice versa. The generated BitCoin currency in iLand Getaway contributes nothing productive to the outside world or helps it to be a better place. Everything exists solely for iLand citizens and their virtual pleasure, which is why fame is worth so much more than the BitCoins.


Family & Reproduction:

Since iLand Getaway recruits members based on application, there is no need for reproduction. There are members that are related by blood, but they no longer interact. The majority of citizens form their own family after living in iLand for some time, including the adoption of pseudo-children.

When a group of members decide to commit to marriage or become a family, they have to file an application with the Department of Kin, attend an interview, and go through a period of probation and observation before they are officially family members. Once they become official family members, then their family status on Facebook and other social media will be updated accordingly.


In the virtual world, there are no plants at all. However, plants exist in the physical world to provide oxygen for the members through their one window.

5 thoughts on “iLand Getaway

  1. I got to say, I wouldn’t mind living in iLand Getaway. I’m an introvert and I strongly prefer interaction via computer over interaction in person. I can spend hours on the internet and it feels like minutes whereas if I’ve accidently gotten into a conversation with a boring person a minute will feel like an hour.

    The only aspect that seems kind of funky is the no-getting-out-of-the-chairs thing. Health-wise that can do damage to your body, for instance, there have been cases of people’s bodies getting stuck to and melding with the surfaces they never moved from. The other possibility is bed sores that can be fatal that are caused from being on one position for a very long time and not hygienic.

    However on the whole, iLand is one of the very very few places I wouldn’t mind spending a lot of time in.

    Also, love the picture of the Apple icon as iris.

  2. I love the iLand Getaway! Sign me up! I’m not huge on social media, and my number of followers on Twitter is somewhat embarrassing, but wasting time on the internet is my specialty! The whole ISIS/Ebola apocalypse, The Five Founding Fathers, Steve Jobs the archangel, programmers being the celerities of the world… it’s all brilliantly on point! That being said, I do have some questions on the organizational structure of iLand and what life is like for the average pixel.
    How exactly does iLand Getaway support itself economically? I see that every citizen will pay a $1,000 fee upon entry and gain BitCoins throughout their careers, but these seem to be different from the real life BitCoins (which also don’t have any real value but are still traded on a market and can be used to make purchases or be exchanged for cash). Since every pixel is a talented programmer, another wonderful thing about your society that I could get behind, would you entertain the idea of having them sell software or web design services to the outside “real” world in exchange for real currency, of which the Founding Fathers could take a cut? Those guys likely have a combined net worth large enough to fund this whole society either way, but this is a way for iLand Getaway to actually turn a profit.
    Since Mark Zuckerberg is the most prominent founding father and is secretly behind God’s Facebook page, I keep imagining him becoming totally power hungry and turning on all the rest of the leaders and becoming a virtual dictator of iLand. This may be because I’ve seen his possibility for evil in Anjelica’s story.
    The whole idea of no physical relations in iLand is a killer. There are some urges that can’t be satisfied purely virtually, unfortunately. Could there be virtual sex, with each pixel attending to his or her own needs in the privacy of their cubicle? This is an issue of vital importance.
    “Thus, religion does not play a major part in their lives unless they really need something.” This is interesting, because isn’t it really how religion works for most people today?
    If there’s anything we could take from iLand Getaway and easily apply it to our own society it’s for everybody to learn programming and have access to speedy wifi services, the world would truly be a better and more interesting place!

  3. I like how iLand Getaway was created almost as a necessary safe haven for people “since the real world has become a dystopia.” When first opened to the public, membership must have been so sought out for. But then why is membership for a new life so cheap at only $1,000? If members plan to live in iLand Getaway for the rest of their lives, the Internet connection is entirely covered by just one thousand dollars? …Unless, if their virtual money then continues to cover this expense, how does the virtual currency carry over to the real world? Their currencies seem to exist in literally different worlds. Also, what happens to the rest of their money in their real-life bank accounts?

    Advancing technologies actually encourage hacking and cyber-bullying, so it is really interesting to see that iLand Getaway prohibits this. What makes these rules more likely to be followed is that players risk being removed from this society permanently. These rules, along with gender equality make this society seem like a great place to live. However, I’m not sure how I would personally be able to survive being apart from my family members!

    To a degree, iLand Getaway does exist today– through virtual reality games like Second Life, Onverse, Active Worlds, and PlayStation 3 Home (I had to look up a list online). I’ve read articles that players have gotten so invested in these multiplayer games that they consider their best friends inside a game (whom they’ve never met in reality) to be their best friends in real life. They even consider their virtual boy/girlfriends to be serious partners in real life. In many cases, people who are dissatisfied with their real lives become fully invested in their virtual lives– much like the people accepted into iLand Getaway.

    Although I have never participated in these multiplayer virtual reality games, I spent a good chunk of my childhood playing The Sims game on the computer—oh, memories! The Sims is a different world where players can create their own Sims—give them personalities and dress them, get them jobs, make them have affairs, have children or adopt, and drown in the pool. What I liked about this game was that by turning off “free will” in the game settings, I had complete control over these Sims. They couldn’t go to the bathroom, take a shower, or eat a meal when they wanted/needed to. My control gave them successful, happy lives or miserable, deadly ones. However, whenever I made a Sim with my name, I tried my very best to keep her as happy and successful as possible! I guess, in a way, I wanted to guarantee a better life for myself.

  4. I really liked reading about this utopia and think that iLand Getaway is a utopia quite a few people would readily go to now if given a chance. especially with how much people depend on the internet and the interactions they have online as their source of lifeline in the “real” world. The most interesting concept in iLand Getaway is religion and how Steve Jobs is thought to be communicating with God as an intercessor. I think this is a great way to gather information from the pixels and how they are truly dealing with and handling life in iLand Getaway, yet this makes the utopia seem more dystopian with a hidden agenda unknown to the pixels who live there. This great lie of religion and of a God is something that could make iLand Getaway more dystopian than utopian but I think that this is the great thing about all utopias- there is something very dystopian about them.

  5. The iLens you discuss reminds me of the Google Glass but even closer to your face than the pair of glasses would be. With technology advances growing at the rate it is now I wouldn’t be surprised if this society actually came to life. I do agree with Peace that the price of $1000 does seem pretty cheap to live in a self efficient chair for the rest of a person’s life. One thing I dislike is that you are forced to sit in a chair all day for the rest of your life. Since I am a avid gym goer I would be upset at the lack of physical activity in this place. Other than that it does seem like an interesting place to live.

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