I have many concerns with Paper #2. My revising is going well, but at times I feel like my ideas are too similar to Cathy Davidson’s ideas. For example, she thinks crowdsourcing and iPods can be very valuable to a classroom, and I happen to agree with her. I would like to talk about crowdsourcing and iPods in my own paper, and so I guess my question is: are we allowed to use Davidson’s ideas for a 21st Century classroom in our own papers? I don’t want to repeat what Davidson writes, but her book does contain many innovative concepts that would complement my own vision for a 21st Century classroom.
Another concern I have is about my thesis, and I feel like I’m struggling to come up with a great opening paragraph. Right now, my thesis is “A 21st Century classroom should be completely virtual and embrace technology. By marrying the world of iPads, Kindles, SmartBoards, etc. with the world of learning, society can manufacture more geniuses than ever. If the modern classroom prepares individuals for the future by hinging on an outmoded way of thinking, then it will soon become impossible for society to advance as a whole.” I tried to make my current thesis as specific as possible, but I’m still not sure if it’s good enough. I’m also struggling with finding quotes to use from Davidson’s book, because there are so many good ones that bring up many good points. However, all the good quotes are very long, and I’m not sure if I can manage analyzing them well enough.
My final concern with Paper #2 is that it’s too long because as of now, I have a total of 6.5 pages. I’ll definitely need to omit a few paragraphs to make my paper shorter. If I can somehow come up with a better thesis, find a balance between my ideas and Davidson’s, and make my paper shorter, I think I will eventually be able to reach a point where I’m satisfied with my work.