After looking at my rough draft along with the comments made, I found that my essay is lacking in a few parts. My thesis is weak but is fairly clear, just not right at the beginning of my essay. However, my content distribution is not that bad. While it seems a bit too anecdotal for a research essay, the material I used was really good and relevant to my main point.
Using the MEAL method, I analyzed my paragraph about Rylan Hefner, and found that it could use polishing. Starting with M, I did state a main point, but it followed with the end of my previous paragraph so on its own, it seems too vague. Next for E, I found that my evidence was excellent in that I backed up my claim using his article. A stands for analyzing evidence, which I did good as well. Although, I didn’t differentiate enough that this was a personal blog as opposed to a formal article. Finally, L. L stands for linking back to the main point, which I did vaguely since I didn’t properly form my main point until later.
Overall, I didn’t do as good as I hoped