Being born and raised in an Asian country, I was surrounded by kids whose parents expected so much from them to the point that they felt like they had no freedom in their lives. From being forced to play a classical instrument to having a pre-decided college major, some kids I knew who have “Tiger parents” were suppressed from having their own choice in life and felt depressed about their situation. But although their childhoods were tough, now when I talk to them they think it was necessary for their parents to push them hard earlier in their lives instead of learning the important lessons that their parents taught them now that they are already college students. The overall idea that kids with Tiger parents are unhappy and should be freed from their totalitarian governors is misleading because most people don’t understand the culture within the way some ethnicities treat their children.
Asian culture does indeed push for a more authoritarian style of parenting because ever since the 1800’s there have been massive amounts of Asian immigrants moving to North America to start a new life and earn “American money.” The thought of success and prosperity has made Asian parents stricter on their children in hope that they will get a good job and achieve success in a new prosperous country
When looking at this issue you have to see through unbiased eyes. It is just a cultural fact that to a lot of Asian parents, pushing their children is completely acceptable. Maybe to Asian parents the way that most American parents treat their kids is too lenient and “weak.” So it is not just to judge how someone educated their children if you do not completely understand the culture that comes with it. To them it is considered a norm of their society.
I think parental education in western and eastern have some advantages and disadvantages. In eastern, school and parents teaches student study hard and assiduously. Asian always said “no pain no gain”. They always think that if you want a better life in the future, you have to study hard when you are kids. You have to work hard after you get into the society. That’s what asian parent teaching their children. That’s why asian parents give so much pressure when they are young. Also, asian parents explained their children that take the chance when America offers the best and free education.
I agree some of the point from fp149346. Some of the american parents are too soft and “too lenient” to their kids. I also understand that some parents are just overly protect their children. In western education, school and parents teaches children to think freely and be creative. Parents and school teaches the right thing of being “creative”, but children may be lazy when parents are too soft to them.
As you can see, both parental education have some advantage. I suggest some parents should push their children little bit hard up to the point that their children are able to handle it. Too soft to children is also bad. Children won’t listen to parents and become lazy when parents manage carefully. Now teenages and children can play computer games , watch television and chat with friends over the Internet every and they they spent more than 4 hours every day which is bad habit. I am not saying stopping them watching tv and play games. Entertainment should be under controlled. Children should study enough hours everyday. what’s what i suggest.
The debate on different styles of parenting can be remedied by examination from a cultural relativsit point of view rather than an ethnocentric point of view. In Asian countries, this so called style of parenting called “tiger parents” is seen as the norm and completely acceptable. However, as normal as this parenting style may appear to the random inhabitant of an Asian country, it may be frowned upon by the average western parent. This is because western parents are examining the eastern style of parenting from an ethnocentric point of view.
Western parents do not understand the eastern style of parenting because it is not what they are used to. Western parents often emphasize the importance of children having fun and doing the best they can, while it is arguable that eastern parents encourage solely perfection and will not accept anything less. It is not to say that one style of parenting is more or less successful or one is right or wrong, they are simply different styles induced by different cultural norms.
If western parents were to examine eastern styles of parenting from a cultural relativist point of view, eastern styles would appear less scandalous. The same goes for eastern parents viewing western styles. Each style has its advantages and disadvantages, but just because one style is not what one may be used to does not mean that it should be frowned upon. Each style works within the norms of that culture.
-Jackie Kaplan