Tag Archives: Suffering

Sadness and Pablo Neruda

When I was reading Pablo Neruda I couldn’t help but feel that he was not a happy man. All three of the poems I read by him tend to have negative and sad feelings. In “Walking Around” he talks about how he is tired of being a man and everything that comes with living. He wants so much to be wild and alive and not be a regular man and maybe he feels he has to do this by being crazy and out of his mind, “It would be beautiful / to go through the streets with a green knife / shouting until I died of cold” (lines 14-16). He further states that he does not want to be a “root in the dark” kind of person, “I do not want to go on being a root in the dark, / hesitating, stretched out, shivering with dreams, / downwards, in the wet tripe of the earth, / soaking it up and thinking, eating everyday”(lines 18-21). These lines show how he doesn’t even want to go on living life regularly, with dreams that wont come to life, and overthinking as regular humans do. He wants to be free and stretched out and not just be a root that stays in one place and is stuck there helplessly till someone rips him out.

I thought his poem “Tonight I Can Write…” was also very interesting. He chooses to write “…the saddest lines”(line 1). He can choose to write about anything he does not need to write about sadness, however he chooses to which I found odd. He mourns a relationship he lost with a woman who simply couldn’t love him as he loved her. He repeats the line, “Tonight I can write the saddest lines”, I think to remind the reader constantly that he is sad and to ensure the reader that this poem is not to be read lightly, that it should give off a sad feeling. When you lose a love it is so hard to explain how you feel to anyone, I think this was his way of trying to explain. He also uses the word “saddest”, not just sad, as though there is absolutely nothing sadder than what he went through when losing his loved one. Perhaps he had to put this all down as a form of therapy to finally let go of this pain. “Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer / and these the last verses that I write for her” (lines 11-12). He notes that this will be the last time he writes of her, almost like he is giving himself this last moment to remember her and that after this, she will be gone to him forever, both physically and mentally. Not in a bad way but in a healthy way, that he needs to move on from her.

The Misunderstood

“It’s not a question of appendix or kidney but of life and death. Yes, life was there and now it is going, going and I cannot stop it. Yes. Why deceive myself? Isn’t it obvious to everyone but me that I’m dying, and that it’s only a question of weeks, days” (762). I think this quote portrays a lot of the central themes in “The Death of Ivan Ilyich”; morality, suffering, and family are all represented in this one quote.

Before becoming sick Ivan ignored his own morality, just like his friends around him. He slept around, and did whatever he wanted; he thought that nothing could hurt him. However, death changes everything for him, and there is nothing he can do now. It makes him reevaluate his whole life, everything that mattered before, now doesn’t. After he realizes that he is dying he doesn’t care what people think of him. “Life was there and now it is going, going and I cannot stop it.” This shows how his past actions, are the reasons that he is going through this. His morality plays a big role in the story.

The theme of suffering is apparent as soon as Ivan figures out that he is dying. He suffers from fear, hopelessness and loss of dignity. Ivan is forced to suffer in the story because of the actions he committed while he was healthy. He never appreciated his life, he only cared about what others thought of him. “And that it’s only a question of weeks, days.” Ivan is terrified of dying, but he has to accept it. However, at the end of the story suffering is what ultimately leads Ivan realize that his whole life was false. He only thought that his life was good because others did. His career, his family, his marriage were all false; he only cared about showing off.

The idea of family is extremely dysfunctional throughout the story. No one seems to understand what Ivan is actually going though, and how he can die at any moment. “Isn’t obvious to everyone but me that I’m dying.” His relationship with his wife is extremely superficial, he seems to hate her more and more as he gets closer to dying. “While she was kissing him he hated her from the bottom of his soul” (763). However, we as the reader have to wonder how much of the alienation from his family is caused by them, and how much is caused by his own dislike of them. We can’t blame one person for the dysfunctional family. Earlier in the story we knew that Ivan didn’t really want to marry his wife, he just did it. Did Ivan ever really love his family? Or was it all a show for people around him to see? We also know that he hates his son who he regards as a “failure.” The concept of family is extremely important throughout the story, but who is to blame for the hatred?