My stomach was in knots. I was more nervous than when I took the SAT’s. My body would never be the same after this but I didn’t have any doubt in my mind. I was just nervous about the pain. It was finally time to begin. I sat down in the chair and braced myself. I heard the buzzing of the needle and closed my eyes as tightly as I could. I took a deep breath and prepared myself for the next two and a half hours of the pain of getting my first tattoo.

This wasn’t just any tattoo. It wasn’t a butterfly, a tramp stamp, or some quote. It was my family’s coat of arms. I had wanted this tattoo for three years. I proudly show of the strength of my family on my thigh every day. It reminds me of my family history and how strong of a unit we are.

Having this tattoo doesn’t define me, it helps to tell my story. It doesn’t make me a bad person, a party animal, or a rebel. It just turned my body into a canvas.

Baruch, One of the most significant business schools in the tristate area. After all that is the reason why I decided to come here. Sure the work load is quite heavy but I already knew what I was getting myself into.

Making it to Wall street is every mathematicians dream which is why the competitive rate is extremely high. This school has the necessities I require in order to be taken seriously out there in the real world. Employers can tell a lot about you from the school you go to. Baruch college ring bells whether you want to believe it or not. Many people in the working environment view this school as a top priority which makes us (the students) have a better chance of succeeding throughout life.

Come on Sydney wake up for kindergarten, you're gonna learn about your ABC's...
Ok, but can I bring my teddy bear?
Come on Sydney wake up for 2nd grade you're gonna learn your multiplication tables...
Ok, but can I watch just 10 more mins of spongebob?
Come on Sydney wake up for 5th grade, today you're gonna learn about common denominators in fractions...
Ok, but can I wear my black and pink heelys?
Come on Sydney wake up for 8th grade today you're gonna learn about fossil fuels...
Ok, but can I cut bangs and dye my hair blonde?
Come on Sydney wake up for 10th grade today you're gonna learn the whole periodic table of elements...
Ok, but can I go to this party this weekend, everyone's gonna be there?
Come on Sydney wake up for 12th grade today you're gonna learn 
about the Freudian view of psychology...
Ok, but who really cares, I don't even know why you wake me up anymore?
Come on Sydney wake up for college, today you're gonna learn about your long term and short term goals, who you are as a person, what 
career path you want to take in life, who your real and fake friends are, basically what is gonna happen for the rest of your life, today you set the path for your future..
Okay but can I just be 5 again ?

Baruch was my top college choice and getting that acceptance was a turning point for me. I realized that I was finally going into the real world, not having anyone by my side to tell me what to do and when to do it. Everything was up to me. Being in high school with all the drama and stress made me want to get out and just have freedom.

My transition from high school to college was not what I expected. Yes the freedom was there but that didn’t matter because if you’re on top of yourself you wont get work done. The workload is much more than what I was used to. Seeing my grade the first time I got them back made me realize this is no joke.  Study study study was all I seemed to be doing but if it meant getting good grades then that was what I was going to do.

Ugh why am I always here so early?

I hope the Bookstore still has the raisinets on sale, just to make my day.

Then ill have to go print out the primary sources for Global.

Ehh that’s not so bad , It’s a good thing I finished all of my homework.

Let me take a selfie and send it to my boyfriend tehehe.

OH SNAP! I forgot to make an appointment with SACC and The Writing Center.

Dag and all the appointments are filled until next week ohhhhh myyy goooooooosssssh!

Whatever I’ll go to the library and try to figure it out on my own.

Let me find Sydney, Chad and Karalene see if they did anything useful.

It’s a good thing the last day of the week is on Thursday

Smt. I still have work all weekend; I guess sleep broke up with me.

Ahh Baruch the place where the smell of questionable halal food infiltrates my nostril

Ahh Baruch the place where every goddam elevator is overflowed by rude ass students

Well, its time to study for my midterm tomorrow.

Lets flip open these books, and study for the next several hours. After all, that what college is. Seclusion at its finest, if I keep doing my academic work, maybe ill make it someday.

Thats what we all tell ourselves, or at least we’ve been taught to believe.

But all this studying and devotion to excellence, where does it take us? Does it help us reach our goals, or numb our brains over the course of the next couple of years until we get to the point where we work as mindless minions benefitting the institution and those who run it; the elite.

What a profound inquiry I just made about our educational system. Is there truth in it, or nah?

All this philosophical thinking is extraordinary, maybe academia is is the inspiration for this, maybe the system works.

What great philosophical knowledge, too bad my midterm tomorrow is in history.

If I could be a super hero, I think my super hero name would be “procrastinator”. My powers would be the abilities to procrastinate anything, anywhere, and anytime. For example this Monologue for Freshman Seminar I told myself I was going to do it the day I got it. But that obviously didn’t happen, I’m currently writing this at 10:30pm Tuesday night. I think it’s due 12:00am but oh wells. I procrastinate everything and always manage to hand in everything on time. I’d have the ability to leave all my clothes on the floor and clean up everything before my mom sees it. The ability  to study for my History test that’s tomorrow and leaving it till now. But most importantly if the cop needed me to help stop a robbery, I would tell him to leave me alone because I need to catch up on my beauty sleep. Yup I am the Procrastinator.

“So how many of you are scarred for life after hearing that?”

Come on, I thought college was all about being accepting and not judging other people for their interests.

But here I was again, in front of a room, where the teacher is scrutinizing me about something I love to do, and asking others to openly judge me (just saying! It hurts).

I mean sure, I’m not like those girls who wear tight clothes and go to parties. I don’t wear makeup and I choose to wear my glasses over my contacts. How plain and boring, I know.

That’s only when it comes to school. Over the years, I’ve realized it was better to fit in than stick out in academic areas.

Enter: Comic-Con.

It’s like a safe haven for me -nobody judges me when I’m there. People praise me for my intricate details on my costumes and the textures of my wigs. Oh yeah, cosplaying is a big deal for me.

Everyone is so friendly and nobody judges you if you don’t wear a costume. At the same time, you’ll receive praise if you do try.

What I’m trying to get at here is that college is no different than high school. Everyone’s judgmental. Everyone sees that weird girl who likes to dress up and tags her as “one of those.”

Well, I guess I’m going back to being random Asian girl #2 again. But when I go to my photoshoot, I’ll be – eh you don’t need to know.

Uh… Shit. I would like to say before starting that I’m glad that this isn’t another essay but… an expressional piece to showcase myself.

In all honesty, I’ve forgotten all of my lines… so what would you like me to talk about in place of my original piece?

I can be blunt and satisfy this urge to vent out what I might have bottled up over my short and developing life. But that might bore and surely annoy the you guys.

Any Suggestions? Please. Say something… anything? God dammit, this is completely my fault. I’m sorry guys. Well, if you’ve got absolutely nothing to throw at me then I guess I’ma just wait until my five-minutes is up.

Gosh, you’re making me nervous. I hate this feeling. I get these pessimistic, hypothetical situations where I leave in the middle of a sentence and the next thing you know the nervousness goes away but it’s too late to go back. Regret, I think we would all call that. I’m actually contemplating about leaving during a particular segment of this… whatever you wanna call it.

The person who went before me was one tough act to follow. Whoever is coming off of my forgettable performance  is definitely in luck.

This was actually planned out. If you guys were cooperative, then I would’ve ended up with the most original improv performance of my career. It seems that you guys don’t care, which is totally respectable because I would be doing the same thing if I were in your position.

But if there is one thing I learned living this life, it’s that we’re all another somebody.