Writing II KMWF

Blog 11: Remix proposal

For my remix project, I am planning on making a Powerpoint. I plan on remixing my Argumentative Research paper on “Donor Organs.” Currently, I’m gathering more visual statistics to help reinforce what I mentioned throughout my research paper. I feel like graphics will help keep my audience focused. Additionally, the statistics I provide in my presentation will allow them to see it for themselves and decide how they feel about organ donations.

Remaking my work into a multimedia piece will help the people who have not made up their minds about organ donations decide the details I provide in the Powerpoint slides. Additionally, graphs and other images I use can certainly make it more engaging for different groups of audiences that prefer looking at visuals other than text. Overall, this project can make it easier for my audience to look through as it would be looking through different slides and visuals rather than going through the 10-page research paper. I feel that these slides would allow the audience to make their very own conclusions based on my presentation. This project will also allow me to express my research in other ways rather than through text.

I’m currently facing a challenge in deciding the graphics I want to use in my presentation. I feel that in my research, I have come up with many pieces and that I should cut down on how many graphics I use overall. Some of my personal motivations for this project is that I know of someone who has gotten a kidney transplant. However, he had certain advantages as he had access to more money when compared to an ordinary citizen. Additionally, his wealth and connections put him ahead of thousands of individuals that wait for organ transplants.

Blog #10

I took this photo over the weekend. This is a part of the Berlin Wall which was dismantled and placed in Battery Park in 2004. I did not edit a lot of the things. I only changed the filter to “Noir” and decreased the exposure to give it the black and white look it has. I edited this picture to help add to the gloominess of the photo and help others who never knew about the Berlin Wall see that it brought nothing but division. I believe the target audience is New Yorkers and other tourists because this is placed in a tourist hot spot in New York, near the 9/11 memorial. Overall, the changes I made to the original image will only add to the meaning behind the wall, which was once used to divide West Berlin from East German territory. I want the audience viewing my image to know that this wall only brought more pain and division to the world, and these edits help amplify the message.

Blog #9

I choose strategy #3, which addresses my readers’ concerns. My readers’ comments helped me understand what an outsider, who knows nothing about the topic, would think reading my paper. Reading my writing doesn’t always help because I don’t think from a reader’s perspective. When I usually write, I may not notice a common mistake compared to someone else writing. Another set of eyes reading over my essay helps me improve my grammar and sentence structures. Overall, Addressing my reader’s concerns has helped me reinforce my thesis and argument.


Blog # 8

  1. Tomas Reed connects the “retrenchment period” at CUNY, which lasted from 1978-1992, to the Covid-19 pandemic by showing how both greatly affected students and faculty. During the retrenchment period in 1976, CUNY began to charge tuition from its students, which remarkably hurt the studies of those who could not afford it. During this time, the city was also cut the CUNY budget drastically. As a result, there were over 5000 faculty layoffs. Likewise, during the Covid-19 pandemic, the state once again cut its budget, and as a result, about 3000 adjuncts were laid off.
    In both times, faculty lost their jobs. Although students might not have lost their jobs during the Covid-19, they still faced extra expenses due to budget cuts. Many students had their educations disrupted as they may have struggled to pay these additional costs.
  2.  Reed uses the term “death cult” in his writing to show readers how drastically an increase in tuition in CUNY impacted students. CUNY, which was free to attend before 1976, let many people, especially minorities who could not afford education elsewhere, get a degree to make a decent education. However, after 1976 as tuitions increased, those who could not afford it lost their education and lost many other opportunities that would have been open if they finished their studies.
  3. . After reading the campaign to decolonize the Lehman College English, I noticed that Lehman College focused on British literature. However, the students did not understand the reasoning behind this curriculum because Lehman College has a substantial Latinx student population. The student requested the curriculum have more Latinx and African American literature as it would be more reflective on the students.


Blog #7

After reading “Joe Biden, Kamala Harris, and the Limits of Representation” by Keeanga-Yamahatta Taylor, “limits of representation” can be defined as not everyone is equally represented by just placing people of color or race in positions of power. This is reflected in much of President Joe Biden’s presidential race. For years, Senator Joe Biden has accused Black communities of a place where crime happens for political gain in his career. As he continued to gain political power, he has never been apologetic to the community he once accused and built his career off of. Rather Biden would say he has not always been right in things he has said. The 2020 presidential race shed light on “limits of representation.” Black voters have been on a decline since 2016, when Donald Trump took office. The Democrats were also aware of Biden and Clinton’s lack of attraction among black voters. As a result, Biden has strategically nominated Kamala Harris as running mate to defeat his political rival, Donald Trump. Biden has chosen Kamala Harris as a running mate to pick up black voters. Although Harris was an African American Female, she couldn’t serve the needs of other African American females that continue to live well under the poverty line today. This representation limit comes from her lack of understanding of where her supporters come from. Kamala Harris, who has wealth and power, can’t understand someone who lives below their mean and is misrepresented because she has never been in that situation herself as an African American female. 

For my art piece, I chose an article titled “Kidneys for sale: poor Iranians compete to sell their organs” written by Saeed Kamali Dehghan. This article describes how easy it is for people in Iran to receive kidneys. Since organ trade is legal in Iran, there isn’t an extensive waiting line for donor organs. I believe this article is trying to point out that legalizing organ trade can lower mortality. Dehghan explains how many Americans die from kidney failure while waiting for a donor. However, this isn’t the case in Iran. Many Iranians can receive an organ when they need it because there is a legalized market.

I chose this artwork to figure out how many lives can be saved if we legalize organ trade in other countries. I intend to use this article to expose the dangers of having organs traded in the black market and how we can make it safer for donors and patients through legalization. 

Link: https://www.theguardian.com/world/2012/may/27/iran-legal-trade-kidney

Blog 5

I decided to focus on Adrian Piper’s “Decide Who You Are, Anita Hill” because the words in red all over the artwork captured my attention. In the beginning, I didn’t think much of it, just thought of it as some of the girl’s thoughts she had. Upon research, I figured this artwork was created in 1992 during the #MeToo movement. Then my thoughts of the painting deepened in a way. I felt that the artist used red text to symbolize the pain and how hard it might have been to speak up against their abuser. The words “You’re overreacting,” “You’re just tired,” “You’ll get over it” made me think of how this sounds like as if you are not trying to listen to what the other person might have to say instead, you are just trying to shut them down and avoid the situation that can hurt you or someone. By silencing a victim of sexual abuse, you are isolating them physically and mentally to a point where they might blame themselves in some cases. This resonates today as some women are still afraid to speak up against some of their abusers due to fear of what might happen afterward. This artwork might bring light to this situation, giving courage to other young women who might have been abused to share their stories knowing that other people like them share similar thoughts—sometimes, knowing that someone like you with a similar story can give a sense of comfort and safety.

Blog 4

After choosing my two paragraphs and completing my sentence analysis, I noticed that I mostly used compound and simple sentences. However, these results did not seem to surprise me. Usually, I use simple sentences, so the reader doesn’t get confused reading my writings. While making this analysis, I also noticed that it sounded like I was writing using multiple tones. This deep analysis of my draft made me think about how I can introduce different sentence structures to improve the quality of my writing overall. I can use complex sentences to improve clarity in my writing.
Additionally, complex sentences can make my writing concise for the reader. I believe making my writing straightforward can allow me to add additional ideas. These new changes in my writing would also allow me to improve how I write overall in all my classes, making my sentences sound smooth and sophisticated. Adding more complex sentences in my writing would also build on whatever I had written in my draft and display my thoughts smoothly on the paper. Adding more complex sentences would also allow me to combine some of the simple sentences I used, drastically improving the flow in my writing and improving the clarity overall. These revisions can take me onto another level of improved writing that I can take advantage of in my other courses. I must also overlook how many times I repeated the same sentence structures since using too many simple sentences can make my writing sound weak, and using too many complex sentences can complicate my writing for the reader.


Blog 3

Your race primarily determines the conditions in the community you live in. Often black communities lack city and federal funding. Consequently, they are either forced to pick up the government’s slack or be driven out of their neighborhood. The article “New Yorks Invisible Climate Migrants” by Sophie Kasakove mentions how many black people in Canarsie and other flood-prone communities in New York are being forced out due to housing affordability. Following Hurricane Sandy, Flood insurance rates have skyrocketed, making it harder for homeowners to keep up with these payments. Lack of funding has also played a role in delaying the restorations of the damages brought by Hurricane Sandy. Many homeowners have given up or moved out, leaving these homes for developers to restore. She mentions, “The flight of working-class homeowners from these neighborhoods has accelerated gentrification, as deep-pocketed investors and developers were best equipped to take on the financial risk after the storm.” The actions of many developers have also made it worse for those who choose to stay in Canarsie as it becomes more gentrified and rent continues to increase. Likewise, In the article “Racial Capitalocene” by Francoise Verges, she states, “It showed that race was the single most important factor in determining where toxic waste facilities were sited in the United States and that the siting of these facilities in communities of color … the Reagan administration’s practice of cutting the budgets of federal environmental agencies had aggravated racist decisions.” This quote reveals how toxic waste facilities are more common in black communities bringing attention to the disparities minorities face. The shared theme in both articles is, Black and Hispanic communities are mistreated due to a substantial lack of funding from the government. This funding from the federal government is essential as it prevents many developers and big companies from taking advantage of minorities when they’re looking for assistance.