Monthly Archives: November 2012

to most people writing about oneself is probably the funnest topic that one can have. In this particular subject i am not like most people. To me writing about myself is annoying. I hate having to explain myself and the way i act. I feel that when you write a monologue that is exactly what you are trying to do. I identify myself as a human being. I dislike talking about myself because i feel that is a way for people to get inside your head. A person does not describe who they are through their words but through their actions. If you want to find out if a person is good you do not ask them that, you determine that through the things they do throughout their life. A person that writes about themselves cannot truly explain who they are because there are things that we do that even we do not know about. I can only describe my identity as me being me. There is no other way to do so other then that. In every situation i am a different version of me, as is everyone else because we learn to adapt to the situation we are in and behave in a certain way. There is no such thing as truly summing up the identity of a person, because every person has multiple identities. It is something that happens automatically without us having to do so. As i am sitting here writing this monologue I am a completely different person then when i am doing something else. I cannot talk about any single experience that changed my life because life is full of life changing experiences. Everything that i have done led me to this point of my life that i am in now, both what i consider significant and insignificant.

Oh boy a monologue well guess ill start with my name as most people know its Felix. Do not meet many people with it so I hope it makes me memorable if not then sorry I couldn’t be more influential. I like to think of my self as fairly social I think I have had a conversation with most of you at one point or another wether by force in class or just bumming around in free time and if I have not then feel free I like to think of my self as fairly well rounded and surely am not shy. Its strange if any of you knew me just a short year ago I would not be able to talk to any of you or anyone for that matter I was one those people that went to and from class and did not try to make friends figured id change before college bit more fulfilling that way. Well what is is there left to say schools going alright I mean about as well as I expected being as lazy as I naturally am sad as it is most of you can find me doing things last minute I work better under pressure. The food is good I honestly did not think I would be able to buy a whole pizza for 8 bucks that kinda amazing in so many ways. How about that hurricane that was kinda nuts did not have power for a few days not fun had to spend time with family, gross I know. Im kidding it could have been worse. What else can I say I hope not to change to much I think I like the way I am. I don’t drink I don’t smoke yah boring life .J peg. I don’t like to think of my self as being obsessed with technology even though that pretty much is the case. Broke my phone for a day felt lost its sad really. I hate reading and I cant write to save my life yah I have heard it before perfect qualities of a student but just how I am. I will be the first to admit I have no idea what I am talking about but I do not like asking for help. My qualities seem to be getting worse with every sentence oh well I do not mind being real I am not perfect do not try to be way to much to live up to not that I know from experience. Im addicted to sleep but not at the right times go to sleep late wake up early then sleep during the day worst way to live but its how I do it. Alright now I am just rambling I wonder if this was long enough ha -insert the easy joke I know most of you are thinking here- you said it not me but alright take care.

It’s cold.  Furled inside a ball of protective blankets, I sit on my giant suede couch and prepare for battle.  The two sides of my mind are armed and ready at the front.  I think about which side will win; will it be the underdog, vulnerability or will stubbornness prevail once again?  A flux of sardonic and apprehensive thoughts, flood into my mind.  The first fire has struck and the war begins.  The offensive starts tryingly strong, leading my compliant mouth to say: “Hey, my name is Reina and this is who I am, five-foot-four, and donned in black.”  Except that I wouldn’t really be clothed.  I’d be naked, stripped through my skin and thick layers of flesh until all that’s left would be my likes and dislikes, my childhood memories, my family history, and my integrity.  Maybe they’ll be told in story-form like, “I remember that day when he left us for good…” or through allusions like “I wear this gold necklace everywhere I go…” The defensive side laughs.  It’s all too clever to be duped.  A master at diversion and swerving carefully around fragile obstructions, it starts to chant: “You open one door and it leads to another!  You start a sentence with ‘I’ and you’re done for!”  With deflection as its shield, walls shoot up, and resistance strengthens.  The war between being honest and being ambiguous escalates into a bloody uproar leaving a slew of carnage, a slew of questions.  Should I talk about my heritage?  Should I tell them that I’m an older sister or confess that I’m a smoker?  Do these things make me who I am?  What makes me who I am?  What makes anyone who they are and why would anyone else even care?  My mind is in anarchy as the battle cries ring.  I put on my headphones, hit play, and continue to sit.  Like an eddy the sounds pulsate and assuage the chaos.  It’s a mental dialysis; tunes pump in and thoughts pump out.  The battle is over.  With a beat and a melody, nothing really matters.

For those who do not know my name is Kelvin. I could be consider an average Asian. For those who do not know the definition of an average Asian, YouTube Bobby Lee. My favorite color is black and red. My favorite form of past time are handball and biking although currently I am playing a lot of ping pong. I love to sleep and eat and since i went to Baruch every week I would eat Halal food. The Halal cart on the same block of VC is in my opinion the best, chicken with lots of BBQ sauce is the best. I had a nice time being in class with you all  and wish everyone the best of luck.