You always constantly repeat yourself whether I should do this and that. Will you let me do what I want even if it is only for once? I feel like you want me to be how you want me to be. I don’t want to grow to be a person you want me to be, I want to grow as a person I would like to see myself in the future. You often accused me and tell me not to do certain things that I have never even done, like when you told me not to sing benna. “I don’t sing benna on Sundays at all and never in Sunday school.” Instead of telling me what can and cannot do, why you never tell me what is the reason I cannot do that. Is it for other people to see the way I behave so it will not embarrass you? or Is it for me? I cannot seem to find the answer without you telling me its wrong.

You are the person I look up to, the person I would like to ask advice from. All you can tell me is the thing that I must and mustn’t do. I am confused on how I should live my life. If I do whatever I want to do, you will tell me not to. But I want to. I want to figure out something without you telling me it’s not right, I want to learn from my mistake so i will not repeat the same mistake twice. I do not want to live on anybody’s expectation and high standard because I am just a girl.