Translation
Text 8
Francisco Guzman, Jilmar Avausto Morales Castillo
Translation by William Chimborazo and Karen Cannan
Karla, your husband Jilmar is dead. His body was found in the San Fernando ranch, beside the body of your little brother, Lizardo, and Hermelindo, your brother-in-law, all three of them killed, three amongst the 72 that died. How many more died with them? Your life in shambles, would you die as well, though I expect that you will not die totally, not forever, because your children need you, and life, though in shambles, is life. You are some where in California, with your children. Perhaps you hide the pain in the same way you hide yourself, undocumented perhaps, and with just reason, it is not the time to bring attention to your family. Is it not strange to think of Jilmar in California, and probably you as well, have and have had much more fear of the ICE (Immigration and Customs Enforcement) agents and the United States authority than that of the of the Mexican authorities, who killed Jilmar? Finally, what are the Zetas? The night has fallen, it fills up the desert, within this entire universe across the horizon are the Zetas and ICE, both are simply the Lord of Darkness’ most viable weapons.
Fortunately Jilmar’s brothers are with you, Jilmar was an accomplished cook in a successful restaurant in California, I am not sure about Jilmars brothers, and perhaps this is best all kept in silence.
Were you well off in California? Jilmar must have told Lizardo and Hermelindo something quite promising, that made both of them go along with him and gather the courage to withstand the dangerous trip to California, and with barely two hundred and fifty dollars to share between the three of them. There was the forty two inch flatscreen television on the wall of Jilmar’s father’s wall in Agua Caliente, a gift from his kids residing in the U.S. the fruits of his hard work. To much is not necessary for Guatemala to look more promising than California. But, which employer would not be content hiring Jilmar? A handsome fellow, with large biceps, and a contagious smile, he crossed frontiers prepelled by love. The first time, five years ago, after you left to Califonia, before he did, when you were only 16 and you were pregnant. Jilmar wente for you, and he got arrested, he spent one year in jail, and he accomplished his goal on the second attempt. In May, he decided to come back to Guatemala to visit with his parents. Because he wanted to see alive not in death, this is how his father explained. Only a person who is valiant and has a pure heart makes a trip for such a reason. His father said he returned very different, very loving. Which means he was not like this before, Karla, but rather after he had gone with you to California, when you both were practically kids. Now you cling on to the dream in the same way that before you cherish Jilmars embrace so as to sleep, because it is in your dreams that you manage to him again, and your little brother as well. Even the nightmare are welcomed, since at least he is there still alive, and the horror is not worse than the one you feel when are awake.
What advice can I give you? I, who has also lost my beloved wife. Let people be generous with you, even when at first it might not seem to make any difference. It will be a long trip. Take the love you have now in the future, in such a way that it will help your children grow, and in a way that will help yourself. Look for beauty wherever you can find it, think of it as a way in which he can give you a sense of relief, just as in the same way a father lifts an infant from the tired arms of his wife.