Who am I? I ask myself the same question all the time. Some people spend their whole lives searching for who they are; well, as of now I might just be one of them soul-searchers. But of course, there’s always the none-the-less obvious facts of who I am. I am a female, a daughter, a sister, a friend. A student at Baruch College who doesn’t know what she’s majoring in just yet – I guess that’s part of my biggest concerns this year.
I fear wasting valuable time searching for a field I’d like to indulge in, I fear not being able to catch up on now college level courses, I fear just not getting used to college life. Simply the word “college” is appalling enough. Most likely I am just thinking too much about this whole college thing, pretty sure 4 years later when I look back at this post I will wonder why I ever overreacted. So far, I think the fact that there are a million (fine, maybe ½ million) students in this school will be what differs the most than from high school. It’s not that I hate people, it’s just the fact that the school gets a bit crowded sometimes, from packed elevators to lining up to get to the escalator, it really becomes a pain in the ass.
In a sense, college reminds me of middle school; an era where we all had set classes and homerooms and see the same people every day, except now we have “blocks.” I don’t hate the people in my block, but because we have the same schedule and travel at the same time to our classes, it makes it harder to meet other people outside of our block. I only have 1 class this semester that has more than just the people in my block – a lecture hall with 400+ students. But since it is a lecture hall where we have assigned seats, it doesn’t make it any better. That’s the biggest difference; in high school everything just comes naturally when meeting others, but now we have to actually try hard to make friends. I feel that people are not exactly social unless you take initiative (which isn’t always a bad thing nor am i implying that). Just my opinion, but isn’t the whole point of college to meet new people (and to learn of course)?
And as for change, I hope I don’t change much, I like the way I am now. Well, maybe become a bit more educated, a bit more knowledgeable, a bit less of a procrastinator, a bit less lazy, and maybe a bit more mature, BUT other than that, nothing else. Actually yea, I hope this first year at college will change my bad habits.
