Sometimes I wonder which side of me is the real me. I guess I’m like mercury. My personality would change often depending on the environment or the people. But then, I guess, other people are like that, too. What’s really weird is, I feel that everyone gets a specific type of “Irene”. Most people at first would get the quiet and shy Irene but that would soon develop into a more defined Irene. Confusing? Weird? I don’t know…I’m just different towards different people. I could be dominating, funny, submissive, loud, grumpy, outgoing, whatever.
Anyhow, at least my identity isn’t that complex. I feel so repetitive, but it’s who I am. The basic summary of my background is: I was born in New York, raised in Egypt, and moved back to New York with only my brother when I was 12. Whenever, I mention Egypt, people think “WOW!” and go like “Is it a desert?” What used to irritate me is when people say I’m Egyptian but I take it as a joke now, so it’s okay. I’m Chinese and I’m born in New York. I don’t think that makes me Egyptian even though I lived there for about eight years. Some people say it does. I’ll just leave that up to you.
I don’t really like change especially starting over when it comes to school. It makes me uncomfortable. I just moved to New York and had to get used to the new system, living with people that I’ve never met before, and just living without the help of my parents. That’s when I became a really good daughter because I started to appreciate them more. Anyways, just when I made some friends, I had to start over again for high school. At least that lasted longer. Now, I have to start over again in Baruch. I can’t really say much about my experience so far here besides the fact that there’s a lot of work! I hope that I would become less lazy and stop procrastinating. Maybe that’ll help with having more time to spend with my friends and just socialize or even just relax.
I’m scared of many things. I blame it on my mom. For sure, I’m scared of bugs because of her. Every time she sees a cockroach or whatever she screams and jumps on the couch or anywhere off the ground. She would yell for my dad to come and kill it. I was conditioned to be scared of bugs but I also think they’re just so nasty with their crawling legs and antennae or whatever. EW. Another thing I’m scared of is needles. Don’t worry, I got my shots. I kind of have to or else I could kiss a good future goodbye for not going to college.
