I have a thing for Ikea. Maybe it’s because they sell every possible furniture you could ever want. Ikea sets out the dream room that you never even imagined before, and it’s only better that they tell you how much every single item in your future dream room costs put together. Ikea even tries to give you a homey feeling to the room by adding fake computer screens and televisions. They even do your dream kitchen and table settings. How kind of them right? They figured out what it took people months to figure out. I like their free pencils and rulers! The pencils they give you may be a little too short, and probably only useful for writing two words, but who does not like free things! I have to give it to them for the rulers though. They are great indicators of the circumference of my head and the size of my waist. And how about those large yellow bags?
I have not even gotten to my favorite parts of Ikea though. I want the KRABB or the SPOKA, with two dots over the O. That’s just the name of the mirror and the lamp I want from them. I’ve never seen these words before in my life, but when I go to Ikea, it seems to make sense that the mirror is named KRABB. Whoever came up with these names is a genius. Or maybe it’s just in a different language. I don’t really care. Sounds fantastic regardless. Whoever built the Ikea is also a genius. When you enter, you pretty much have to walk around the entire store before you can find the exit. It’s like a maze. The arrows tell you that you’re approaching the exit, but really, you’re not. They are making sure that every single person who goes in there will see something they like by the time they exit the store.
Finally, when you get to the exit, you think your whole Ikea experience is over. But actually, it just begins. Who would have ever thought that after walking miles in Ikea, paying for what you picked up while traveling around the store, that you would end up face to face with a food stand sort of thing. They sell hot dogs for 50 cents, cinnamon buns for $1, ice cream for $1, and pizza for $1. HOW COULD YOU PASS THOSE OFFERS UP. You can’t. Everyone on the line in front of me know the deal. We have exhausted ourselves finding the exit, emptied our wallets paying for all the unnecessary stuff we end up buying, so we will make ourselves feel better by buying some cheap food. :]
