Author Archives: sydney.winnick

Wow…my first semester at college is almost over. The time flew; literally! I feel like it was just yesterday that I was being driven into the city by my parents, my neighborhood looking new and confusing. I also feel like it wasn’t that long ago that my dad and I toured Baruch with one of the security guards, as he tried to show me his alma mater. I remember at that time thinking that it was such a cool looking school, so modern and interesting.

It’s interesting to look back on these past few months and see how I’ve changed. To begin, I’m much more independent. I went from not even doing my own laundry, to doing that, food shopping, time management, planning, and organizing projects. I never thought I’d see the day where I was my own mom! More importantly, I learned how to use the subway, basic street smarts, and the most fun places to go. At school, I saw myself change dramatically. I’m not sure if it has to do with clubs I am a part of or just basic growing into myself, but I am a lot more confident. I remember being nervous when I read my monologue for the class. Now that seems so foreign: I’m okay with speaking my mind, speaking publicly, and expressing myself. I love the friends I’ve made as well. If it weren’t for how busy I am and how much work I get, I’d hang out with them all the time.

As far as Baruch goes, it feels like high school. Overall, other than the independence and the way I have free time randomly throughout the day, I feel as though I’ve just moved. I don’t feel really any older than high school, or that I’m in a different place. I only feel like I’ve moved schools and houses.

Wow…my first semester at college is almost over. The time flew; literally! I feel like it was just yesterday that I was being driven into the city by my parents, my neighborhood looking new and confusing. I also feel like it wasn’t that long ago that my dad and I toured Baruch with one of the security guards, as he tried to show me his alma mater. I remember at that time thinking that it was such a cool looking school, so modern and interesting.

It’s interesting to look back on these past few months and see how I’ve changed. To begin, I’m much more independent. I went from not even doing my own laundry, to doing that, food shopping, time management, planning, and organizing projects. I never thought I’d see the day where I was my own mom! More importantly, I learned how to use the subway, basic street smarts, and the most fun places to go. At school, I saw myself change dramatically. I’m not sure if it has to do with clubs I am a part of or just basic growing into myself, but I am a lot more confident. I remember being nervous when I read my monologue for the class. Now that seems so foreign: I’m okay with speaking my mind, speaking publicly, and expressing myself. I love the friends I’ve made as well. If it weren’t for how busy I am and how much work I get, I’d hang out with them all the time.

As far as Baruch goes, it feels like high school. Overall, other than the independence and the way I have free time randomly throughout the day, I feel as though I’ve just moved. I don’t feel really any older than high school, or that I’m in a different place. I only feel like I’ve moved schools and houses.

Apparently, I’m not as “out-there” or strange as I had thought.

Here, there are so many people, that there are statically more people like myself.

I like that.

I’m used to being different, in the sense that I don’t share the same beliefs or am brought up the same way as others

Like, I grew up in New Jersey, right? Only an hour a way, tri-state area, typical.

People were always confused by me.

I wasn’t an athlete, or Italian, or Irish, or rich.

I liked art, and worked really hard in school, and my family was a big part of my life.

That really wasn’t common.

I also, apparently, looked different.

I dressed slightly more avant-garde, and my mom, being from the city, always wore a lot of black.

So, even when I was younger, I never saw anything weird about wearing at least something black.

That WAS weird, apparently.

And my favorite thing, or not favorite, but something I always found secretly humourous, was when the Abercrombie Barbie phase died out around junior year in high school.

And all the cool Jersey kids wore urban outfitters, like vitage-esque dresses, with their Uggs.

So hot, I really can’t.

Then it became all, “Oh Sydney, I really love your outfit.”

Because apparently I was more with it than everyone else thought.

If only this had been the comment in middle school.

 

But beyond the typical annoyance, I still had really close friends.

And I miss them a lot.

They are at schools all over the place, and I’m in Manhattan, by myself.

I’m the only person from my high school who goes to Baruch.

When I first moved here, it was a relief.

I could be myself, and that was it. No one knew me otherwise.

But what I quickly learned, is that even being a huge city, the island is surprisingly small.

Everyone knows someone, and the odds are good that you have multiple connections to people.

So it turned into, I know a ton of people now and they know me as well, even though we’ve barely talked.

I don’t feel so new anymore.

And as much as I like knowing all of these people, and all of the great friends I’ve made, occasionally I’ll feel kind of lonely.

I don’t have my best friends, or my mom, around to help me

because I haven’t known anyone here as long, I sometimes don’t know if they’ll truly care or be able to help me the way my old best friends did.

It’s a weird feeling.

More positively though, I love it here.

I love all of my new experiences,

& I actually really like Baruch

I’m slowly learning to be independent,

And at the same time

I’m glad I get to spend some of my last teenage years living in a city.

Not many people get to do that.

And because I’ve moved on, sometimes I get a melancholic feeling when I visit my home.

Some people there, never left, and to them apparently I’m this cool story because “oh my god you live in the city? That’s so cool! I’m so jealous!”

And as I say this, I also think about the people I’ve met here who would roll their eyes at me.

Because I’m Sydney from New Jersey

Even though I was born in Portland, Maine

And I can say I live in NY, but it really isn’t my home

And I’ ll never be from here

And it’s funny I act like I am

Because I’ll always be from New Jersey.

 

So this is me, I have nothing to hide.

I’ve become super open since living here, and a lot of people think that’s strange.

But also a good thing.

I like it so I don’t have to waste my time.

I’d rather have people know me for who I am

Than get rid of me once they realize what I’m all about.

Like I said, I don’t like to waste my time

And that’s why I’m glad I’m living

Or I guess quote “dorming”

In a fast-paced city.

I honestly don’t have time for bullshit.

 

My name is Sydney Winnick. I am a freshman at Baruch college. But who am I? Hmm…I guess I can say that I am my own person. No one is truly unique, but I am true to myself. I am an artsy, outgoing, giggly, and caring individual. I always let people open up to me, because I like listening and giving advice. Being this type of person, I was not sure how I would fit into Baruch. So far, I love it. My greatest concerns though are my grades, getting accepted into selective clubs, and being able to handle my social and academic life. Even with all of this though, Baruch is a lot different from my high school. I went to high school in central New Jersey, and was not a fan of many of my peers. The people in NYC seem to be a lot more like me, so I have a ton of fun with my new classmates. This experience will definitely change me. I’ve become a city girl, and have a new found appreciation for for enjoying my surroundings and my new opportunities. By the end of this year, I feel that I will be a more confident, strong, and savvy individual.