Author Archives: Susanna Chen

Our LC and I went to the Rubin Museum as an out of class experience. There, we appreciated the artwork displayed to us.

One work that caught my attention was the Wheel of Dharma and Deer. It was a wheel with two deer on each side. It is said that this piece was displayed at the gates of all Buddhist temples and monasteries, so it became the most well-known icon of Buddhism as an institution. The piece belonged to the Alice S. Kandell Collection.

The entire piece was painted in a gold shade of color; the material was gilt copper alloy. However, it was not the color that attracted my attention the most, it was the wheel. It reminded me of a ferris wheel as well as the “wheel of fortune”—not the game show—the tarot card. Interpretations of the card include, but are not limited to: turning points, opportunities, fate, surprises, life cycles, etc.

Perhaps, it was fate that it caught my attention?

Sometimes I wonder what I really want to do in life.

I see people hustling.

Volunteering, working, and spending every moment of their free time doing something productive. At times, I’d think, I want to be like that… But is it all worth it in the end? I wonder when his or her life comes to an end, what would it be that he or she will remember?

I see people being content.

Even if the world is about to end tomorrow, they would shrug and go on about what they were doing and they’re okay with that. At times, I think I’d want to be like that—so carefree and happy. But then I would ask myself, then what am I working so hard for right now?

I admit it.

I confess to being indecisive and swaying easily. It took a long time for me to establish some goals in my life and still, I’m unclear about what I want in the long run…

In high school, I just wanted to graduate and get out of there.

Now I want to graduate from college.

Yes, graduate. I’m a freshman and I’m already hoping to reach the finish line. Let’s skip all the majors discussion and what career I’m going to have for the rest of my life for now because that seems to be all that people want to push onto me.

“You should become a dentist. My dentist is crappy and unreliable; I’d love to have a trustworthy dentist.”

“You should become a pediatrician. Then we could take our children to go see you instead.”

No.

Don’t do this to me.

Don’t try to project your shattered dreams onto me.

Don’t try to make my decisions for me.

What happened to, “You’re eighteen now. Make your own decisions”?

Because that line seems to be used only when I’m sincerely asking for your input and you just don’t want to give me any.

Yet, when I finally decide that to hell with asking for your advice, you try to project your thoughts into my reality.

It sickens me to the core.

I am simply a young girl trying to live my life to the best of my ability. I love sweets, especially chocolate, but I refrain from devouring chocolate only because I do not wish to get fat. I love sleeping in my warm and snuggly bed. My adoration goes to my family and friends. I hate being bounded by many rules, but that is beyond my control, so I try to accept them. Homework and exams aren’t my cup of tea either. I severely dislike paper cuts; they are so small, but so damn painful. I also hate complicated things. We make life so complicated, even though, if you really think about it, life can be really simple.

I am bored a lot, but can be amused fairly easily. Furthermore, I am a little shy on the side, but I can talk for a long time if I really like a topic. Lazy is another word that describes me. However, I will work to the bone if whatever I have to do, is something that motivates me or very meaningful to me. I have yet to find a career that I would love to have for the rest of my life, but I’m not going to rush it because I have a lifetime to find it.

I live by: “Success is achieving what you what, but happiness is being content with what you already have.”

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Regarding Baruch College… currently, my top three concerns for my freshman year are:

• how to survive all my classes in one piece. I highly doubt it would be a good idea to ruin my GPA so soon… (or ever for that matter)
• how to finish reading all the readings I’m supposed to do in a reasonable and timely manner. People were not joking when they said college was reading intensive. I suppose I would not mind the time flying as much if I actually enjoyed said readings. If anyone got some speed-reading tips, please share. Thanks in advance.
• how to choose classes & professors/schedule classes in the future. Let’s face it; who doesn’t want easy A’s? Who actually wants 7 hour gaps?

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Differences from high school…

I expect my future classes to possibly be more reading intensive as well, which is much more different compared to a few pages of reading daily. Starting next semester, I will probably see different people more frequently because we will not be grouped in blocks anymore. I do not know whether this will be a good thing or bad thing as of yet, but I will just have to find out in the future.

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How will my first year of college possibly change me?

I will definitely learn to be responsible for my actions and the consequences they lead me to. This is a time where there is nobody to hover over me and make sure I do this or do that. Professionally, I hope that college will prepare me enough to face the work field. Socially, I hope to find people who I can keep in contact with for a lifetime!